Can anyone critique my essay?

<p>Hey,</p>

<p>I'm considering applying ED to Reed. I decided to have a crack at writing my CommonApp essay and while I'm not too satisfied with the result I got, it's still something. Which is much better than what I had yesterday!</p>

<p>I don't want to post it here on the forums but I'll link it to any Reed student/parent/alum (via PM) who's willing to help out and tell me what they think. Post here or send me a PM and I'll get back to you with the link.</p>

<p>Thanks.</p>