Can someone please harshly judge my essay?

College Essays
1

<p>I'm basically done. I've written so many drafts and like this one the best. Its about 650 words. My teachers like it, I just want some more opinions. It's about my experiences with medicine and why I want to become an orthodontist. PM me if you would like to help and I'll send you my essay.</p>

<p>Thanks</p>

2

<p>I’ll give you feedback. PM!</p>

3

<p>i can help you out, just PM.
i just finished my college essay we well, maybe we can trade!</p>

4

<p>PM it over and I’ll give feedback</p>