Can this be considered as a "hook"?

<p>I know that questions about "hooks" appear very often on this forum, but I'm referring to the term in a broader way - something, anything, that makes you stand out from the general applicant pool at top schools like MIT or Stanford. Now, I myself don't have any definitive hooks like legacy or top athlete or national olympiad winner, but I was wondering if any other parts of my application could be used. First of all, I moved to the US from Russia in 8th grade with very basic knowledge of English and even math (the Russian public education system isn't that strong), and I had to take ESL and algebra 1 in 8th grade. Now I'm a senior, in AP English with a 5 on last year's AP test, taking calc 3 (5 on calc BC), and with a 2370 SAT. I think I can write a very good essay about this transition, but I'm worried that it'd be considered clich</p>

<p>Many hundreds of students emigrate from Russia every year and are in the same situation as you – so no, that’s not a hook.</p>

<p>It’s not exactly a hook but it does show a lot of great qualities about you, definitely write about it in your essays!</p>

<p>Since two responders have given two opposite responses, I will throw out my two cents. I have no idea if hundreds of students who have emigrated from Russia are all writing essays to the same schools as you – but lots of students from different countries HAVE emigrated and have faced the same scenario. But what you have accomplished is impressive … so pick a PART of what you have done; pick learning English for example, and write about it – find humor, or sadness or something that makes the reader FEEL you and what you have gone through. Don’t do the “superficial” crap of “I moved here when I was x years old and it was so hard and blah blah blah.” Start with a hook – something you recall. Maybe your first day in school, or going through customs or something…</p>

<p>Good luck!</p>

<p>Momof2back2back, thanks, this helps a lot! Not that the other two responses didn’t as well. I think it’s a really great idea to focus on one specific experience out of my entire process of assimilation ,and elaborate on it in one of my essays.</p>

<p>I agree with momof…</p>

<p>I’m writing my second UC personal statement about learning Russian but my story is really different from yours. I moved here when I was 5 and I never learned Russian in school. I couldn’t even read azbuka. Plus growing up all the kids would bully me for being russian, call me a communist, etc IDK if you experienced that as well. So I’m writing about how learning russian has affect me as a person, how it helped me get in touch with my culture after years of bullying in school, etc. Just learning the language by itself isn’t very powerful, you need to relate it who you are as a person.</p>

<p>People often equate the euphemism “hook” as anything that helps you stand out from the general applicant population and increases your odds of admissions. </p>

<p>A “hook” is something that can increase your odds of admission, but not all things that can increase your odds of admission are “hooks.” </p>

<p>Traditionally hooks are being an under-represented minority (URM) at the school (Hispanic’s going to help you in New England, not so much in Texas or Florida); legacy; recruited athlete; development (family gives a lot of money) or you’re closely related to someone really, really important … a business figure, celebrity or someone in government.</p>

<p>I think your story is really interesting, though, and you should absolutely do it for your essay as I already started to feel like I was learning about you as a person from your post. Best of luck to you. :)</p>

<p>Interesting - in writing, the “hook” of an essay is what in the beginning is going to grab the reader’s attention. This is why I suggested thinking of a a specific time or place in your life with regards to transitioning to English here in the U.S… I tend to come from a place of “authenticity is ideal” and not “gaming the system per se” (not that either is 100% correct) so I forget about the other type of hooks…</p>

<p>The point of the personal statement essay is to let adcoms glean some of the personal qualities they feel are relevant in their students. Relevant to college, that college and what they seek in students. It’s true that many applicants write about their transitions, of many sorts. So the question isn’t, “Is this interesting?” or even will it make you stand out. The question is: is this the tale that makes you compelling for that college? In this case, “show, not tell” is about more than the stats. Think about it and make your best decision.</p>

<p>lookingforward – awesome answer.</p>