Can you grade my essay? (first attempt)

<p>Prompt:
In some states, legislators have debated whether teenagers should be required to maintain a "C" grade average in school before receiving a driver's license. Some people think this would be a good policy because having passing grades shows that students are responsible enough to be good drivers. Other people think such a policy would not be appropriate because they see no relationship between grades in school and driving skills. In your opinion, should teenagers be required to maintain a "C" average in school before receiving a driver's license?
In your essay, take a position on this question. You may write about either one of the two points of view given, or you may present a different point of view on this question. Use specific reasons and examples to support your position. </p>

<p>Essay: </p>

<pre><code>Teenagers are offered various options which often lead to controversies. Legislators have been debating whether teenagers should have a "C" grade average, in order to obtain a driver's license. Although some states, parents, or teens would disagree, students should be required to maintain a "C" grade average before receiving a driver's license.
People who disagree to this opinion believe that there is no relationship between grades in school and driving skills. Although, these people may be true, students with below average grades tend to be less responsible. A lack of responsibility can easily cause harm to safe drivers on the road.
The opportunity for a teenagers to drive isn't always free. Programs which help students obtain safe driving skills can be very costly. In fact, these programs can be worthless if the students is not willing to put effort and hard work in to them. Students below a "C" grade average are usually not trying their best, and show signs of immaturity.
</code></pre>

<p>Another reason why teens should be required to maintain a "C" grade average in school before receiving a driver's license, is because they have shown that they are willing to be safe and responsible to themselves and other people on the road. "C" average students try whatever they can to maintain their grades, which shows that they are willing to take such an opportunity as driving with great care. </p>

<h2> All in all, Teenagers should be required to maintain a "C" grade average in school before receiving a driver's license. This is because these students are responsible, motivated, and hardworking. Without these skills, there is no guarantee for the safety of passengers, drivers, and walking pedestrians. </h2>

<p>Yup will this is my first time taking a writing test, and I did time it. I will be taking the ACT in September as a sophomore. Thanks so so so much for taking your time and grading my essay. :)</p>

<p>Please guys bump</p>

<p>Bummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmp</p>

<p>Please it would mean a lot!</p>

<p>Bummpppppp</p>

<p>Honestly, a 4 paragraph essay doesnt seem to organized. You need a lot more thoughtful examples that support your thesis. And make the Introduction appealing. Your’s is quite dull. And for your conclusion, make it unique and outstanding. Out of 12, I give this a 6 or 7. </p>

<p>For some help, just read graded essays that are either 5s or 6s and youll understand how to write a well scoring essay. I read like 4 essays and got a 9 (95%). Hopefully I get higher on September’s.</p>

<p>…Depends if this is the ACT or SAT. Your strategy has to adjust based on the exam’s grading method. Keep that mind. It isn’t like submitting a paper to a teacher in your junior English class.</p>

<p>Ok thanks guys, I will try harder</p>