Career vs. Love

<p>Ooh, April 14th. The saga has probably already ended. But I'd like to put my two cents in anyway:</p>

<p>Cent #1) If you go to LA, and your gf follows, both of you will be stressed beyond belief. She will have to adjust to a new lifestyle, you will be constantly buried in work work work. Doesn't bode well. If anything, a long distance relationship for a few years (one or two--as a previous poster said, she can choose to come later) will spare everyone some grief.</p>

<p>Cent #2) Not going to the school of your dreams is not the end of the world. Research is supported by other researchers, not entirely dictated by them. If the school in Denver is as good as you portray it, I see no real problem with staying and accomplishing as much as you would in LA anyway. It's not like you're choosing between Harvard and Community U; you're not going to be rejected for positions later just because you didn't attend that <em>particular</em> school--what you do with your research will be most important. And in today's internetworked society, it's feasible to maintain working relationships with the profs in LA (just like it's feasible to maintain a relationship with your gf, though difficult emotionally) and even carry out projects with them, if your Denver advisers are not adverse to the idea.</p>

<p>If it were me, I'd move to LA. Girls will come and go. If you stay, there is no guarantee that your relationship will last and you may not have 100% control over that. The great thing about academics is that you do have a great deal of control over it. Results positively correlate with your effort much more so than a relationship.
You should choose the path that leads to the greatest economic output. Make her make a decision and don't let her make you make a decision.</p>

<p>What did you decide to do?</p>

<p>This decision is obvious, go to LA. If she loves you and wants you to be happy she'll sacrifice to be with you. You have one life to live, you can always meet other women but you can't always go to grad school. Her reasons to stay are not reasonable consider the oppertunity you are being given.</p>