Last night, I had a few guys over in my dorm at USC before the game and we were quietly drinking a few light beers. I had invited a few other kids in my residence hall to stop by earlier that week and they told a lot of their friends. Before I knew it, 15ish people were in my room drinking beer and playing beer pong. Someone propped the door open though, so my RA came in and made us dump it, took our names, took pictures as evidence, and said we will be contacted soon by the residential college coordinator. My RA said it was an “excessive” amount of alcohol which was honestly ridiculous as all I had was a 12 pack of light beer. It probably looked bad as we had a lot of hardly filled cups because of beer pong. I also had NO hard liquor or marijuana in the room.
I got the beer from my house in San Diego and brought it up. No one else who got caught drinking knows where it came from. As long as I tell them the truth, nothing catastrophic will happen to me, right? I doubt they’ll take away my scholarship, but I’m a little worried about my student government position and my overall relationship with my RA. Any advice for what to tell the residential college coordinator and my RA?
I know a lot of you on this site would say I should be kicked out of the school or I should lose my scholarship but I believe what I did was relatively harmless and the RA overreacted. This is college after all, at least we weren’t binge drinking on frat row.
Well, next time you know that inviting 10+ people into your dorm room to drink while forgetting to close the door is not very discreet. Drinking in the dorms is indeed common in many colleges and most colleges know that no matter what they do students will drink anyways, but you still need to be smart about it.
Just don’t get defensive when you meet with the RA and coordinator (like saying it’s harmless or that the RA overreacted). The RA is just doing what they’re supposed to be doing, and honestly you made your room a very easy target—most RAs won’t go out of their way to investigate unless it’s glaringly obvious someone is drinking.
Apologize, make it clear you’ve learned your lesson, say you won’t do it again, and be overall contrite. Since I’m assuming this is your first offense, I doubt they’ll do much.
@MaineLonghorn@silmaril thanks for the advice. I have already texted back and forth with my RA a little and apologized and he said he’s not mad but it’s not in his hands anymore. I will be super apologetic when the residential coordinator meets with me but also try to help my friends get off easy even if it means a bigger punishment for myself.
We were being very discreet at first but way too many people started showing up and I didn’t want to turn them away as they were my friends. I have a suite and I was in my bedroom but I had no idea someone propped the door open from the hall to the common room. Either way, I should’ve been more cautious.
The RA was doing their job so they did nothing wrong. You were drinking against policy and underage. They didn’t overreact. They are suppose to bust parties and document. Sometimes the staff let people off with a warning and a commitment to watch them more and sometimes the consequences outlined in the housing regulations you agreed to will be implemented. You are in college learning how to be independent. There is a learning curve. The best way to handle things is to be not only as apologetic as you were with the RA more so with the residential counselor. You need to realize that you are responsible for your guests. You bought/brought the alcohol and need to own up to that. Your friends will likely get called in discreetly and tell that you provided it and they just came by. This is a life lesson. Next time walk around your party, close the door, make sure no one is over the top etc. RAs do not go looking for parties and will look the other way on a beer in a cup but an open door with many people drinking no
These days the RA is obligated to shut it down and report it. Too much liability if he doesn’t. A result of the legal blame game that has taken over if something were to happen.
Now that you’ve been caught and reported once, you’ve got to be clean from now on. I would imagine that second chances are ok but not much after that.
First I have to say I’m sorry this happened to you. IMO, it’s ridiculous. We are shutting down social drinking. I happen to believe beer and wine should be legal at age 19 (keeps it out of high school). Personally I’d rather have people your age drinking some beers before a game than sitting around gaming or doing drugs.
But as to your problem…
Where my son goes to college the first offense is just a warning and nothing happens. Hope the same is true for you.
Be apologetic. Keep in mind that you were also providing alcohol to other apparent minors. It’s not like each person brought their own. That or it would look like you and/or your roommate planned to split 12 beers. I can see why it’s a big deal to the people responsible for the dorm. Good luck to you and never do it again. You have too much to lose.
Thanks for the responses. I got a pretty serious sounding email from the RA, here is a small piece:
R.4. Alcohol-Games: Possession of alcohol paraphernalia used for games, such as beer bongs and beer pong tables, or replication of alcohol games are not permitted anywhere in the Premises or Building. Residents violating this policy are subject to immediate eviction from the Premises and Contract cancellation
Do you guys think they’ll actually follow through on this? This would be devastating but I imagine that students get caught doing this kind of stuff all of the time.
I personally disagree with the drinking age. College students drink and have for decades. When I was in college and the drinking age was 21 you were allowed to drink with no fear on campus. Drinking was permitted in the open where it was safe. The result was there was little in the way of binge drinking. So I personally do not think you should lose your scholarship but I am not the school. Best of luck.
Perhaps…they say “are subject to immediate eviction” and not “will be immediately evicted.”
I think I would not suggest to say “it was only beer”…or “I didn’t mean for it to get out of hand” or “it was only light beer” as this is still against the law and the rules of USC.
I think I would be honest, take responsibility (as they saw you)…more like “I thought I was just going to have fun with a few friends but it got out of hand…and I realize that any amount of alcohol at this point is too much and I must take the law seriously and that I should enter into an alcohol education program.”
I would not think that you would kicked out for a first violation (although you may be).
I’m sure it’s not uncommon for students to get caught drinking in their dorm at a large school like USC. Maybe you can ask around and see what kind of punishment typically gets handed out for a first offense.
From wine coolers to vodka, it still contains alcohol, even if you think that drinking light beer is not a big deal. Rules are rules, but honestly, a verbal warning and an alcohol class/essay along with a small fine ($100 or so) should be your minimum punishment, because that’s the policy at my college. Now, if you get caught again, then the consequences may be more serious, but I don’t think that you should get kicked out for one offense IMO.
On an extra note, I don’t like beer at all, but once I turn 21, then we’ll see.
I think you’ve had a good scare and rightly so. They are unlikely to kick you out for a first infraction. Be contrite, apologize, tell them it won’t happen again. Apologize profusely.
My scare was getting caught with alcohol in my dorm room after our spring formal when I was a senior. I was over legal age (it was 18 back then) but our dorm had strict rules. I remember the head of the dorm calling me in and pouring out the bottle in front of me. I was PETRIFIED she was going to call my parents, which would have been a disaster since they were teetotalers and would have been furious with me. I was so thankful she didn’t. I learned my lesson!