<p>Thank you all for the vote of confidence, but for the record – and I’ve never said this before, so you shouldn’t know – I am a “he.” I’m the father of two kids – and yes, I have little patience for chance threads, which may seem why my posts are harsh at times. I lack the warm and fuzzy, but always try to give an honest assessment. Best of luck to everyone!</p>
<p>^^^^^^^^^^lololol I always thought gibby was a “he” until someone said he’s a “she” so I changed to “she.” lesson learned never trust others</p>
<p>Oh geez–did I start this?! Sorry, gibby–I never gave any thought to your gender. I just said “she” in one post because (i) I didn’t think it mattered and (ii) one tires of saying “he/she”, his/her", “him or her”, etc. At least this provided anxious SCEA applicants something else to think about for 5 minutes!</p>
<p>^^ No, you didn’t start it; I’ve been a “she” for over 2,400 posts. For the longest while, I’ve been amused by it, and finally decided to come out of the closet, so to speak. And it doesn’t matter – or at least it shouldn’t.</p>
<p>^^ Haha, glad the record’s been set straight!</p>
<p>Just to clear up some misconceptions (some interesting psychoanalysis going on here). As a rising senior, I can speak for what goes on in my mind as I post a chance thread:
- In truth, what I want is a crystal ball. If I’m going to get rejected, I think I could move on, and move on fast. I’ve basically been rejected with every application I’ve ever sent. But the thought that I just might get accepted is what makes me worry all the time. I have a strange philosophy where I think that if I keep thinking about how much I want something I might get it. Generally, humans worry more at the thought of missing something than after the fact when they realize nothing can be controlled.
- Second, I agree I am egotistic, but not necessarily in the sense lovenerds meant. I am not looking to gloat about my accomplishments on a CC board, or smile in approval as people reassure me that I have a strong chance of getting in. Rather, I am egotistic in the sense that I have an inflated sense of the importance of my own life, and an inflated sense of the importance of which college I go to. If I get rejected, the world will move on. Nor does the world count on me to save it by getting an education. This I realize objectively, but not emotionally. Nor am I sure I want to realize this emotionally just yet. I think maintaining a degree of naive idealism (or even egotism) is fine because it is in large part what motivates us. And I will have plenty of time to be more realistic as I grow older.
- The striving for peer approval remark I think is farthest off the mark (lol rhymes). There is absolutely nothing cool about posting a chance thread. Nor am I looking for reassurance, although I guess I may be subconsciously. Well, actually I am looking for reassurance, but more in terms of the calming effect of knowing my destiny. Which unfortunately will not happen. I am not sure what type of peer approval you are referring to here.</p>
<p>Either way, regardless of whether I am accepted or not, I doubt my life will change significantly. I think I’ll get into one of the colleges I want to. I will still keep trying at what I do, because if I don’t, there will still be the same consequences. But I do want to get accepted, because first, there’s a lot of busy work that I’m being assigned now that I’m doing purely for grades. I want to use this time to do more useful stuff like actually learning material. Second, I don’t want to have to write more essays. Third, I won’t have to ponder the thought of going to a college I don’t like, or even worse, not getting into college.
And fourth, regardless of what people say, if I am not accepted, both peers and parents will think of me as a reject (but luckily, not teachers). Especially because I am Asian and live in a somewhat Asian culture. This is not an illusion; this is fact supported by various conversations. And I agree that this is a bad reason to want to be accepted. Because while college acceptance may be an indication of success, it is not the sole determinant of success. And I should not be wanting a spot at Harvard because I want the prestige, but rather because I want the opportunity. Ultimately success in life comes from oneself, and one’s true ability and character (whatever it may be) will take precedence over any artificial impressions of self that he tries to convey. And one of the scariest parts of human nature is the desire to feel superior to others by trying to use prestige and names and what not. But while I try to avoid doing so, sometimes I am still guilty of this. Either way, I have resolved to myself that I will not abuse the badge of Harvard if I get in, and I will try to avoid disclosing anything about the decision in real life. And if I do not get in, I will ignore the stigma and continue working hard. Because if I deserved to get in, and didn’t, I’ll have another time in life. And if I didn’t deserve to get in, there’s nothing to be upset about. I think it’s important to care about what others think about you to an extent, but like all things in life there is balance. Either way, I’ll admit social approval in real life has something to do with my anxiety, but social approval online is not the motivation for any of my actions.
So what is this whole post? First, some insight into a senior’s mind; second, my opportunity to state a philosophy before I get the actual decision. I think people’s “don’t worry about which college you get into” after they get in carries less weight. And third, it’s another example of egotism, and once again, I’ll admit I have an inflated sense of self. But still, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. Selfishness is bad because it can lead to unhappiness, and it can harm others. I’m pretty happy at the moment although a little stressed out (but generally stress and motivation come hand in hand), and wasting your time with chance threads, at least in my opinion, does not really qualify as hurting you ;).</p>
<p>^^Lol I guess I didn’t make it clear in my previous post. There is absolutely nothing wrong w/ seeking for peer approval. If you are posting a chance thread with such great statistics, you are most likely seeking for peer approval, which precedes and is the foundation of all other factors, such as attempting to calm yourself-you calm yourself down by obtaining reassurances from others. Again, it is not a bad thing. It’s just a way to relieve some of your stresses! and I think most ppl applying to Harvard can understand that feeling. Also, my post wasn’t directed toward you; it was directed toward the person who said things about gibby. </p>
<p>Anyways…hopefully I’m not getting into an argument here haha. Best wishes for you, and I’m pretty sure MIT likes you lol.</p>