<p>I hesitate to ask this, but my child has a chronic illness- it won't go away ever. This has presented significant challenges in her life and daily medications, still I think she has excelled despite the limitations. I feel like bringing this up to potential colleges is borderline ******baggery...sorry can't think of a better term. Yet, this has totally shaped her life in many ways. And without divulging the exact medical condition it is very serious requiring specialists... so how would you handle this if it was your child? Say nothing? Say something? Feeling very torn.</p>
<p>You’ll need to bring it up if she may possibly need accommodation at some point. I know that there are other posters whose kids have sometimes needed to reschedule exams or take a lesser class load or the like because of chronic health issues. I don’t recall the details, but I seem to recall that in some cases the schools/professors have been less than sympathetic and apparently found it difficult to distinguish a kid who is making a massive effort NOT to ask for any special consideration from a malingerer. So this is something you may want to address up front. </p>
<p>I hope that one of them comes along to help. I can’t recall who it was, but if someone else can perhaps you could send a PM.</p>
<p>Is this something that is likely to come up in her recommendations or essays?</p>
<p>Write out thoroughly how your child’s condition has impacted her life every day and in getting through school. Schedule an appointment with the school counselor who will be writing her rec and give her a copy of this, and copies for the teachers writing recs. That way they can knowledgeably bring this into the picture. </p>
<p>As for your daughter, she should not make a big deal about the condition except to touch upon briefly, unless she has some profound essay dealing with it directly. Never should it be used as an excuse or as a “poor me” thing. </p>
<p>I have a child with issues of the sort and that is what we did. That he had done work in the field of his health issues helped it to get tied into his life in some essays and activities, but he did not directly discuss it. If the condition is truly pervasive, it can be addressed, in the “other things about you” section, but it should be discussed without any hint of expecting any break from it. Selective colleges like to see kids succeed terrifically despite these issues, and are not particularly sympathetic about giving much quarter because of them.</p>
<p>I’m with cptofthehouse here. If your school’s counselor is any good, they should be the ones bringing up the subject. "… Matilda’s accomplishments are all the more impressive because of her cystic fibrosis. Although she has had to miss a week or two of school from time to time, she is the #2 student in the class… "</p>
<p>Thanks for the advice! I never thought about the counselor saying anything. My D has an illness that isn’t very well known and understood and most people aside from family, close friends and athletic coaches don’t know about it. She does miss school at times for it and she has to avoid being in the sun for long periods of time. But other than that, there are no outward differences and she is very active physically. She is lucky as it could be much worse. We will have to think about it…</p>
<p>There are a number of parents on here dealing with medical or learning issues in their children, and it can be a great place to get advice and support.</p>
<p>For admissions, yes, the counselor at the high school should mention this, and sometimes teachers or coaches will. Achieving while dealing with health issues is considered a sign of “character” and ability to “overcome obstacles,” so no worries. I ended up enclosing a note also, with guidance’s package, explaining some of the online courses and other differences in her high school program, but that was at the request of guidance, and I kept it short and matter-of-fact. She did not write her essay about anything remotely related to health.</p>
<p>If your daughter’s illness is what I think it is, then it could get worse in college (partly if the illness progresses, but also with the lifestyle changes), and it is good to be prepared for the new challenges of college life. This means having some accommodations already set up, rather than dealing with things after the fact. Colleges have disability offices that are very confidential. In many schools, the student is given a letter simply stating that they have registered with a medical problem, and may need certain accommodations. The student can choose to never use them, but it is good to have them in place and available.</p>
<p>Generally, we have disclosed to the disabilities office right after accepting the colleges’ offers of admission, and then she has met with them herself.</p>
<p>My child’s first year was rough, but for the last two years, the college has been more than amazing in its understanding. Not sympathy, which she would never want, but in understanding her hard work and drive. She rarely takes any breaks that might be offered to her when she is ill, but there are a few times when she has, and it has made all the difference.</p>