<p>Hi, I'm currently a senior in high school and I've been accepted to both Stanford and MIT. I still don't know which one I'm going to (a bit last-minute, I know). The problem is that I really like MIT, while my dad likes Stanford. I'm posting this in the Parents forum because I figured that the people posting here would probably have a better sense of perspective on this dilemna than me, and this dilemna is between me and my dad.</p>
<p>To give some background: Stanford, for me, is much closer to home than MIT. It would take about a 5 hour plane ride to get to California, while it would take about a 12 hour plane ride to get to Massachussetts. My dad feels strongly that I should stay closer to home for college, but I'd really like to experience living in a major city and wouldn't mind the time it takes to travel to the East Coast. Stanford and MIT are offering near-identical financial aid packages to me (MIT is offering a bit more), so this is not a factor. I'm almost certain that I want to major in computer science, or if not computer science, at least something math or science-related. I know that a lot of kids change their majors while in college, but I really can't imagine myself majoring in anything but a math or science-related field (those are the only things that really interest me enough to study them for 4+ years).</p>
<p>I've visited both Stanford and MIT. I visited MIT this past summer and went to Stanford's Admit Weekend last week. Overall, I liked MIT's campus a lot (they have some cool looking buildings), and from what I've heard about the general culture feel like I would fit in there. Again, my dad was unimpressed with MIT's campus; we saw some rooms that looked like they had been damaged by rain or something while on a tour, which made him uneasy. I think he took it as a sign that MIT doesn't really pay much attention to keeping up their buildings. Both my dad and I thought Stanford's campus was beautiful. </p>
<p>The biggest factor influencing my decision right now is the distance. While I don't mind spending a long time to travel to a college I love, my dad wants me to be a lot closer to home. I think that, in a way, he thinks that I might not be mature enough to handle living by myself so far away from home, especially at a college that has a reputation for making kids sink or swim independently. (I personally think I'm mature enough, but I'm the one in love with MIT here.) Also, I've been reading some of the other threads on deciding between two colleges on this forum. When I imagine that I've decided on Stanford for sure and have sent in my deposit, I feel a sense of regret, like I'll always wonder what I could have done if I had gone to MIT. This makes me think that I really do want to go to MIT, but I have to consider my dad's wishes in this too since he's the one paying for all of this.</p>
<p>Any input that could help me make my decision?</p>
<p>Congratulations... You can't go wrong with either school.
Both are at the very top of the countries best schools.
Stanford and the west coast are a little more laid back,fairly good weather year-round, easy going lifestyle, open spaces, although competitive in every way. MIT and the East coast are a little more stern, cool to cold climate in the spring/fall/winter, city/busy suburb more densely populated with many surronding campuses of many Boston area schools.
As you can see the climate, both figuratively and literaly are the most significant things I can think of that seperate the two schools. You really can't go wrong with either school. Which ever you select.. take pride in it and don't look back. You must have done a few things right to have earned such an tough choice ;-) GL</p>
<p>A 5 hour flight really isn't that much different than a 12 hour flight when it comes to distance -- either way you pretty much lose a day to travel when you also factor in time change and waiting at airports. </p>
<p>Just sit down with your father and tell him how you feel, and reassure him that you will stay in touch.</p>
<p>Two major differences: climate and size of city. Once you are on a plane, it matters less whether you are on a 5hrs or 12hrs. flight. You are still sufficiently far from home that it makes little difference.
It may not make a huge difference in terms of airfare either.
MIT actually has several features that help ease the incoming students. First semester grades are Pass/Fail. There are also a few programs that gather students into smaller groups (check them out on the MIT website).<br>
MIT students may not enjoy the CA weather, but they know how to have fun. Check out their latest hack (prank) against Caltech. They also have the fun of living in the Boston/Cambridge area. My S turned down Stanford and is attending the school down the street from MIT. He has friends at MIT who are very happy.</p>
<p>If you need more encouragement, follow your instincts and go to MIT. You will mature to meet the demands of your situation--an important part of your overall education. That gut feeling is the best guide to what you should do, don't ignore it. </p>
<p>If you feel that MIT is the place for you, you should definitely go to MIT.</p>
<p>The students at MIT are a special crowd, and I suspect it is a different crowd than the one at Stanford (or pretty much anywhere else, for that matter).</p>
<p>(My husband is an MIT alum, so that is the basis of my perspective. He recently forward to me an alumni column on his class, and their pasttimes were definitely not your average hobbies -- one guy collects yeast cultures, for example.)</p>
<p>Another parent for MIT. Hope you can talk this through with your Dad, because I think you've thought it through nicely and consulted your "gut." Both are pointing you in the MIT direction. Calmom's and marite's point re travel time is just what I would have said - you lose a day to travel either way. Yes, you might feel a little more wiped out after the 12 hour ride (vs. the 5 hour), but it's basically the same experience.</p>
<p>A sense of regret would be an unfortunate way to start your college career. It wouldn't be the end of the world, of course. But I hope your Dad would also feel that he doesn't want to send you off with a sense of regret.</p>
<p>Were it me, I would choose MIT even over his objections so long as I didn't feel it would cause an irreparable rift.</p>
<p>At this moment, my S - who will be transferring from Tulane due to Engineering phase-out - has nixed the school which I would have as the top choice for him. I may not agree with his criteria, but they are his. I haven't - and wouldn't - push him to follow my criteria. Maybe your Dad needs a little training in allowing you to make decisions ;).</p>
<p>Shouldn't the question be how to convince your dad, rather than where you should go? It sounds like you've got that second question all locked, even before you asked for our advice (and it is a very reasonable choice, it's not like Boise State vs. Stanford, is it?)</p>
<p>My son and I both graduated from Stanford. He purposely chose not to apply to MIT because he wanted the more laid back atmosphere of Stanford. And he loved his time at Stanford, as did I, back in my day.</p>
<p>That said, if you feel MIT is where you would best fit, I say, Go for MIT. Both are terrific schools. However, if you feel a special attachment to MIT, I think that is where you should go. As others have said, the length of the plane ride is really not important. Explain your feelings to your dad. Promise to keep in touch frequently. It can be hard for parents to let go sometimes, and your father may feel more secure having you a little closer. Help him to understand that you are mature enough to handle it. (In other words, present your argument calmly and in positive terms.) </p>
<p>There are kids on Caltech site deciding between that school and Stanford. The travel time is less relevant, as both in CA. It is the atmosphere and the type of students that make all the difference. Look at the Caltech thread for the differences in CORE requirements. For techie kids, that don't desire big sports teams, and want lots of clubs in music, CS, anime, etc., the tech schools are great. Humanities may be less plentiful, but quality. Also, you can always go down the street for that 'special' class. either way, great choices.</p>
<p>It's nice to know that the travel time shouldn't matter that much. At any rate, since so many of you have said to just go with what I want I'll try to talk to my dad again and explain how I feel to him (and tell him that I'll keep in touch). Thanks for all the advice. :)</p>
<p>For what it's worth, here's one more. We live 5 hours (by plane) from CA & about a travel day from the East Coast (if you leave in the evening, you arrive the next evening). My son applied (with our blessing) to schools in CA & the East Coast & spots in between. We allowed him the option of choosing where he'd be happiest. Once you have to get on a plane or planes, it doesn't matter so much whether it's a 5 hour ride sor several plane rides that take about 24 hours in travel time (tho of course the latter is a bit more tiring). In any case, we don't expect son to come home more than Summer, Winter Break, perhaps Spring Break. That's not a ton of trips either way. My sister's kids often will travel home over Thanksgiving as well, making it a total of perhaps 4 round trips/year.</p>
<p>Good luck & congrats on such wonderful choices!</p>
<p>To me a 5 hour plane ride and a 12 hour plane ride are about the same - they're both long flights! It isn't likely that for either you'd be going home on a weekend! Your choices are great. Choose the one where you think you'll fit the best.</p>
<p>Yeah, but dad is probably thinking If I really NEED to get there, Id rather get there in five hours than in twelve. I think this young person should commit to MIT. But he should also be sure to probe his fathers mind to try to ease his concerns. Its crazy hard for some parents to imagine their kids being so far away, for so long, and after so many years of being nearby them.</p>