<p>i love my new roomie for the most part, but there's one thing that annoys me about her. she's somewhat clingy, and always is hanging around me and my friends. she's fun most of the time, but she just seems to attach herself to my "group" and feel that she is invited to everything we do (on the weekends at least). ex. last night, when me and my friends were talking about what we were wearing out, she goes "so what are we doing tonight?".....she just came to school this semester, so i understand that she doesn't have too many friends. but she's starting to be irritating when she just invites herself along to whatever party or event me and my girls go to. how do i get her to stop being a clinger, without coming of like an insensitive bastard?</p>
<p>Well if you don't want her to go with you guys, then you will just have to tell her. I mean I don't see any other way to solve such a situation. Why is it a bad thing that she is with you guys anyway?</p>
<p>Since you like her, I think your best bet is just to make her part of your normal group. It's hard to come midyear, and I can totally understand why she'd sort of attach herself to you and your group of friends if you two get along.</p>
<p>If you really mind, then you don't have many options except to say something like "Actually, I already have plans with _____".</p>
<p>i AM NOT a *****..like "..." said in my bunk bed post. i like my roomie, but that doesnt mean she has to be around me 100% of the time. i see her enough throughout the week that i'd like to hang out with OTHER PEOPLE during the weekend. sheesh, is that so much to ask?? just because i like her doesn't mean that i have to be around her every second of every day.</p>
<p>im a clinger
im astonished by my roommate's patience.
do the i have other plans thing
anything else would hurt her</p>
<p>well she invites me to go along with her sometimes because she feels sorry for me and i told her i feel bad that she sees me almost 24/7</p>
<p>I dont really see the problem, you say ya like her. do your other friends like her? if so then whats 1 more person. its only been 2 weeks at most, so ya cant know her to well.</p>
<p>I actually think this is why people get double rooms. and people who get triple+ rooms want this thing even more.</p>
<p>yes you are her roommate, you two sleep in the same room.</p>
<p>gemstar what school do you go to?</p>
<p>If you already like her I think you just move her into your group.</p>
<p>cant u just put yourself in her shoes??? she's new, and the only person she knows sufficiently well in the entire college is YOU. you cant blame her for wanting to socialise with your friends, because that is immediate. o man...</p>
<p>Come on guys. Just because you like someone doesn't mean you want to be w/ them 24/7. Doesn't the OP have a right to hang out w/ her other friends sometimes?</p>
<p>I can relate to the OP. Being with the same person 24/7 can get quite tiring after a while.</p>
<p>My suggestion is for you and your friends to not talk about plans in your roommate's presence. Is everyone meeting in your room and talking about plans? If so, then meet somewhere else, somewhere without your roommate.</p>
<p>Otherwise, have a one-on-one conversation with your roommate and establish groundrules regarding her participation.</p>
<p>
[quote]
Otherwise, have a one-on-one conversation with your roommate and establish groundrules regarding her participation.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>"You will not be allowed to hang out with me on the weekends!"</p>
<p>Haha, that would be messed up.</p>
<p>
[quote]
"You will not be allowed to hang out with me on the weekends!"
[/quote]
should be modified to state something like:</p>
<p>"I like you and sincerely value you as a roommate, but you should not automatically assume that it is always ok to hang out with me and my friends all of the time. We will extend an invitation to you when it is appropriate. Your understanding with this matter is appreciated."</p>
<p>I think you should be nice, but if its bothering you, be honest, tell her.</p>
<p>bring her to other clubs around school where she can make some friends of her own. and then she'll gradually find other things to do on the weekends instead of tagging along with you. she also needs to make some of her own friends.</p>
<p>I say be sensitive, you have to live with her after all. If she asks on the weekend what's going on just say something like," Sara invited me to go (insert anything) with her so I'll be doing that but I hear there's a great (show, exhibit,party etc) tonight, you should see if someone on the floor is going and check it out.</p>