I think the difference here is when a parent “drives the bus” and makes it their own obsession to find a D1 school for their child, and when the student is the driving force behind their college choice.
@rickle1 sadly I see this all the time, parents scouring the country looking for “some” D1 school for thier kid so they can post to their own twitter account that their child is a D1 ATHLETE!!! The student has that ‘deer in the headlights’ look because they don’t really have any say in the matter as to where the will attend college.
@twoinanddone your post is definitely the happier scenario of kids / families using the students passion and superior sports ability to actually get accepted to (and maybe help pay for) college. Sometimes it’s a a smaller college that they hadn’t heard about before, but there’s nothing wrong with that as long as everyone who makes the decision does it with eyes wide open and the understanding that you’re going to a college, not simply another sports team.
I think a good barometer / question is: Would your kid choose to go their without playing the sport? Not suggesting it needs to be their top choice as that would be very limiting. But does the school meet all your fit requirements without the sport aspect? Location, academics, size, school feel / spirit, job placement, etc. My observation is that many of these kids are defining fit as “can I play X here?” with very little concern about the rest.
There are a thousand good schools out there where kids can have a wonderful collegiate experience, far more than anyone can pick through effectively. In this country there’s a very unhealthy reliance on rankings to help whittle this list down to a manageable number, so anything you can do to introduce your own interests and values into making this choice is an improvement over US News. Want to know the difference between the four schools tied for #76 on some list? A lot will depend on what you want to get out of your time there.
Our oldest DD was an athlete and a very good student so we sifted through hundreds of schools based on their volleyball programs. There were still plenty of excellent schools on the table in the end, and she chose a great one that fit her academic, athletic and social needs (and was a place we could afford!) DS was into marching band and we were able to crank out a list of midwestern schools with programs for him that really helped focus his search. You have to choose based on something, and sports is as good a place to start as any: people are passionate about it, they do think about it very regularly, may work out for hours a day, and it can provide a filter to help manage the list you base the harder decisions on.
(Of course no one can help you if you think college = sports. That sort of thinking makes even club sport teams look cheap. Yikes.)
My old D stopped playing club for her sport after freshman year summer. She could have done D3 if she kept with it, but never a chance for D1, too short. She picked up another sport for HS but nothing in the summers. So she started working. She works two jobs both PT, but averages about 45 hours a week. She loves it. She likes making money. I love that she is learning responsibility. I think that experience will benefit her just as much as playing a sport. I also love not having to pay for club.
In the end there is no one right answer for each kid. But just get all the information you can before you commit to anything.
When our child made the recruiting rounds we were very concerned about the balance between academics and athletics. When we raised this with one top DV1 coach, expressing our concern about balancing the rigors of college with the challenges of training and competing, the coach responded, “But aren’t you already doing that right now?” And you know what? He was right. Our child had been doing that all along. Now clearly college is more challenging than high school, on many levels. A commitment to compete for an NCAA program is not a light obligation. But it isn’t as if they have not all been doing it all along. Our child went to school every day. Carried an honors/AP course load. Had a social life. But our child also trained 5x/week for many, many hours. Traveled for competitions throughout the US and abroad, to the extent to which we had to apply for waivers so as not to be in violation of district absences policy. This is not to say that every young person can achieve top academics, anymore than they can all achieve top athletic results. It is also not to judge which student-athletes can handle the balancing act at the college level. It is also not a license to put on rose-colored glasses, losing reasonable perspective about recruiting prospects and the challenges that such opportunities may present. But to the extent they have all been working for this, struggling with these challenges, and generally giving their best effort to include the sport they love, I am optimistic that most find their way.
So when our family learned it’s lesson was when our genius son( 4.0 unweighted IB w/
BC calc, 1570SAT, state award for best editor school newspaper, president student government etc etc) got waitlisted or rejected at all the ivies and NESCACs, and our more academically ordinary son with a 31 ACT by the grace of God(still 4.0) who could do a double somersault off a diving board was sought after and courted by the same NESCACs that rejected his brother.
And for smart girls from the NE you’d better have an angle or prefer a woman’s college!
That’s why those of us who aren’t rich enough to be rich help our children succeed at their chosen sport. The $3000-$5000 total we spent on our daughter’s 4 years of travel/ lessons/camp along with her 34 ACT and 97 unweighted average
helped her be a more competitive applicant and gave her choices genius brother never got.
Of course you can prefer less selective schools. But if only top ranked schools will do, sports can still help .
Some interesting advice about the process from Yale Lacrosse HC that pertains to the process of fit, recruiting process and what’s needed in a student athlete…