<p>Pyewacket:</p>
<p>Your original post seemed to be more about content than style. These are two quite different issues.</p>
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<blockquote> <p>Many of the examples I've read that others say are good seem overwritten, more like short stories that happen to be based on true experiences than like discursive analyses of one's goals, accomplishments and personal qualities. >></p> </blockquote>
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<p>One can "sprinkle the contents of a thesaurus" on a "discursive analysis of one's goals, accomplishments and personal qualities" as well as on ""short stories that happen to be based on true experiences." In fact, a college application essay that used "discursive analysis" probably would put an adcom to sleep.</p>