Coming Out Common App Essay (Yale, Stanford, Harvard) Suggestions Please?

College Essays
1

<p>Hey everybody! </p>

<p>I spent a long time working on an essay that I was really proud of. I used it for scholarship money for other schools and I decided it would fit well with the common app essay. However, the word count was 971 words. After many cuts I finally got it down to 497. I feel like it has lost most of it's "Wow!" factor. </p>

<p>I am looking for people to critique my essay and give me suggestions on how to make it better. </p>

<p>The quicker the response, the better :) Thanks guys!</p>

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<p>Ill read it! PM me</p>

3

<p>Thanks so much! I sent you my essay.</p>

<p>Any other critiques are more than welcome!</p>

4

<p>Send it to me too :)</p>

5

<p>Thanks! I sent it to you.</p>

<p>Looking for more opinions and suggestions on my essay!</p>

6

<p>I can read it if you want. PM me! :)</p>

<p>Sent from my SGH-T959V using CC App</p>

7

<p>Thanks guys :slight_smile: I sent you the essay.</p>

<p>I would really value other opinions and suggestions, I want to make sure it’s as good as it can be before I send everything in!</p>

8

<p>I’ll be willing to read it.</p>

9

<p>I would love to read it too. :)</p>

10

<p>I’d love to read it. Pm me :)</p>

11

<p>I’d love to read it :slight_smile: but wait is it a common app essay or supplement essay?</p>

12

<p>And can you please read my common app essay also not supplement?</p>

13

<p>yup, i can do it</p>

14

<p>I’d love to read it and offer my 2 cents! Pm me</p>

15

<p>AdamLaLa
I would like to read it, and comment it
please email to me</p>

16

<p>Hi! I’d love to read and critique your essay. :)</p>

17

<p>I can help you in terms of content but I’m afraid I’m not so good with grammar :(</p>

18

<p>By (Yale, Stanford, Harvard), do you mean that you’re only applying to those schools with common app and using this as your common app essay, or are you adapting this essay to fit each of your supplements?</p>