common app short answer help

College Essays
1

<p>I would like some feedback on my common app short answer. Would anyone be willing to give me their first impressions on it as well as possible revisions? Thanks.</p>

2

<p>I'd really like some help on it, don't worry its only about 170 words.</p>

3

<p>ill read it..PM me</p>

4

<p>I can help</p>