Commuting vs. Dorming

Student Lounge College Life
1

<p>My college is about 35 minutes away, just slightly more with traffic.</p>

<p>Since it's so close it makes a lot of sense to commute. I'd save a ton of money on housing and have the comfort and privacy of living at home. I get along well with my family and they support this decision so no problem there. Everyone talks about the "college experience," but I'm not the most outgoing person and my focus would be my studies anyway. I don't party or drink and I care about privacy. </p>

<p>I'm not strapped for cash and I can afford housing, but it seems like a waste of money, especially because I'd probably be coming home on weekends. And some adults from my town work at that college and commute there just fine.</p>

<p>I don't think I'll have a horrible, boring life living at home. I'm involved in volunteering, political groups, etc. in my local community, plus I already have a lot of friends in the area. People talk about gaining independence but I can move in 4 years for graduate school anyway.</p>

<p>The cons: It might be harder to get involved with clubs (which can be important for grad school, and are fun). But if I'm flexible with my driving hours it should be ok, I hope.</p>

<p>Also sometimes there are study groups, tutoring, etc. at night in the dorms. I don't know how important this is, anyone care to share? I've always studied on my own in high school and found it more effective, but who knows.</p>

<p>Even if I live on campus I'd probably go home every weekend anyway. I have a lot of things at home (my activities/groups, old friends, young siblings, etc.) that I don't want to completely cut ties with.</p>

<p>This particular school is not a commuter school at all. Many students come from out of state or even country. Only about 25 students commute, and they all live under 10 minutes away. That's the biggest con for me; I would definitely be in the minority and I'd probably be the farthest commuter. Aside from any stigma and having to work harder to make friends, though, it doesn't seem too bad.</p>

<p>Any advice from people who've faced similar situations?</p>

2

<p>I live oncampus. If I could commute from home, I would most definitely prefer that. Sure, I’ve made a few friends by living in the residence halls the last two years, but I’ve also spent a significant amount of money that I would have loved to saved!</p>

3

<p>Oh yeah, also: freshmen living on campus can’t bring cars. The school is basically in a quiet college town with little public transport so if you want to have fun you either stay on campus or use a car to drive somewhere else. I don’t really like the idea of being isolated/stuck there (even if there’s stuff to do, I at least want the option of being able to go elsewhere) and I wouldn’t want to depend on upperclassmen friends for rides.</p>

<p>Also, I just read this on another topic:
“I went home almost every weekend my first semester so it was practically like I was commuting then, and I definitely realize now how much I missed out on stuff…We go swing dancing on friday nights, and go to parties alot on friday and saturday nights. We also sometimes go to the movies on tuesday nights for student discount night.”
I don’t want to sacrifice going home on weekends so might as well commute? Plus I frankly don’t care about things like swing dancing and college parties and don’t think they’ll really enrich my life that much. </p>

<p>I don’t understand it completely, to be honest. This “college experience”-crazed culture seems to be unique to America based on other countries I’ve lived in, visited, and have family in. In Canada, Australia, and many parts of Asia and Europe, people just commute to the college nearby and become fully-developed, well-functioning, employed adults, and they are perfectly content with that.</p>

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<p>You should live in a residence hall at least for the first year.</p>

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<p>It sounds like you’ve made up your mind, and are just checking to make sure it’s not a bad idea. Well, you have some good reasons, if I were you i’d live at home.</p>

<p>futurenyustudent, why do you think it’s so important to live in a dorm? Especially coming from NYU, where we have no campus and some upperclassmen are pretty far from WS. I lived at home 1st semester and made plenty of friends. 2nd semester I moved into an apartment with my boyfriend, his parents foot his bills and bought him furniture, so I only have to pay for food and some utilities. It’s pretty sweet, much better than living in a frosh dorm if you ask me :wink: and it takes me like 20 mins to get to class, same as plenty of students who dorm!</p>

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<p>molly, obviously it should be taken on a case by case basis, but it’s easier to make friends when you live with them :wink: Some people have better social skills, or are more extroverted than others. And if you’re going to fall on your face, better to do it when you’re 18 than when you’re 22 or older-your parents are much more likely to bail you out at 18 than at 22+.</p>

<p>Even though I got shafted by housing this year, living in housing helped me adjust into college better. Freshman year is not the time to be trying to figure out how to make a 40 minute commute and still have a social life-this is the time to be adjusting into university. Ideally for the first semester you really shouldn’t even have a part time job.</p>

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<p>I live about ten minutes from my campus and my “college life” is appealing for my needs. I made friends my first semester (though not all of them were school friends). Clubs weren’t hard to join because most of them only meet on a week basis. If you’re at school, you could always use the hours before the club meeting as study time. I didn’t have a traditional college experience but I’m still happy with the outcome.</p>

<p>Living in a dorm doesn’t make you independent, lol. You’ll get a sense of independence once you’re on your own and your parents are no longer flipping the bill.</p>

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<p>You seem to have taken pretty much all factors into account with your decision.</p>

<p>“Living in a dorm doesn’t make you independent, lol. You’ll get a sense of independence once you’re on your own and your parents are no longer flipping the bill.”</p>

<p>Remember, a lot of people in dorms don’t have parents paying the bill.</p>

9

<p>Casualty, it kind of sounds as though you want to live at home, and since you’ll be able to save money, have a car, and still have a social life, why not? good for you for saving money.</p>

<p>@molly41 - I go to nyu also, I think dorming freshman year is a good idea because it makes it SO much easier to have friends. Unfortunately that’s not an option for some people, my parents didn’t want to pay for housing and I’d feel selfish asking them when they’re already paying so much for a pricy school. I feel like commuting helped me grow up a little, it takes me 45mins-55mins each way, plus I had a part-time job. It was much harder to make friends i’ll admit, and I’m a bit introverted too. In a fast-paced urban college with no campus, being surrounded by other students can be helpful! But I agree the OP sounds like he would do fine at home.</p>

<p>but that deal with your boyfriend does sound pretty good :)</p>

10

<p>Thanks for all the stories and advice, keep em coming :)</p>

<p>You’re right, I am very confident in my tentative decision to commute. It’s just that so many people are so strongly recommending against it (current students at the college and even an admissions counselor there). But I feel like most of them have different priorities and goals than me with regard to college (an experience vs. an education). </p>

<p>Honestly, the main issue for me is that it’s definitely not a commuter school. It’s a small “tight-knit” liberal arts college where only about 25 people commute and none from as far as I do. So my concern is with being in the minority, and the social ramifications of that (and academic, but I hope/imagine those will be minimal). The social situation doesn’t matter to me now, but based on everyone’s warnings I’m scared that it’s more important than I seem to think.</p>

<p>Another issue people bring up is what to do with the free time between classes. But I think I can just bring a laptop, study in the library, or whatever. Lugging around textbooks isn’t a problem because I can leave them in my car, which, given the small campus, wouldn’t be too far away.</p>

<p>I feel fortunate to live within driving distance of a bunch of colleges, and this is the best closest one. There is one much closer, which is a commuter school, but it is academically much worse. So I don’t think the social benefit of being among others of my “type” (commuter, lol) is worth the drop in academic quality.</p>

11

<p>Im 100% for on-campus.</p>

<p>Why? because it forces you to become more independent. I’m wrapping up my first year now, and living 200+ miles from home has definitely changed me. And personally, it makes me concentrate and focus better. If you want, casualtyofsociet, you can go home weekly or monthly. I go home every month, although I can easily do weekly. Forcing yourself to be away from home is something better learned now than later.</p>

<p>Just my 2 cents.</p>

12

<p>What kind of independence does it really teach you to have?
If you live on campus, you’re most likely having your meals made for you every day by the dining hall staff and having your bathrooms cleaned for you, etc. I’d probably do more of that stuff on my own if I lived at home anyway haha. And it’s not much of a ‘real world’ experience because you really are in a college bubble, living within this little society with people just like you (sure they can have different personalities and backgrounds, but they’re all the same age and in college - the real world is NOT like that lol). </p>

<p>Did you mean emotional independence from your parents?</p>

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<p>Depending on how much your parents will let you ‘get away with’ it can help you with being independent. Sure, you might say you don’t want to go out and party/insertanythingelsehere, but that’s an easy thing to think if your parents would never allow it in the first place. You go out and live in a dorm you actually have the option to go out and do basically whatever you want. Doing these things means you’re doing new things that you couldn’t when you were living with your parents, and I think the idea of independence is more clear there. </p>

<p>NOT doing these things is also a choice, though, and it let’s you take stock of what it is you’d actually like to spend your time and energy doing, and possibly build up some will-power that parental guidance could be substituting for now. The truth is up to this point your parents have probably had a major role in most of the major decisions that you’ve made, and probably more than just a ‘giving you advice, take it or leave it’ role much of the time. Living away from them means that it’s you making your decisions, which means you get to learn more about what kind of person you are and change that now if you have to. You seem to not quite like ‘the college experience’ but to be honest the college experience is just ‘the growing up’ experience but in a somewhat safer zone where you’re surrounded by others going through the same thing.</p>

<p>You’ve also conveniently neglected to mention dating. Your dating life will be tanked by living 35 minutes from campus and at home. Maybe you think you want to stay focused on academics and don’t have time for things like that, but man is not a robot.</p>

<p>So yeah. I’m not saying “DON’T COMMUTE YOU’LL DIE” and I’m not saying you should commute. I just wanted to clear up what people meant by independence.</p>

<p>Also don’t live at home all four years. You’ll be 22. Living at home. Gotta leave the nest some time buddy, even if it’s to get an apartment near your college instead of the actual dorms. And don’t go home every weekend if you do live on campus. Do stuff around campus.</p>

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<p>Casual, don’t let anyone tell you (in real life or on CC) than commuting means no social life. I have friends, have a boyfriend, we see each other all the time, my commuting friends have lives…it’s not like you’re living hours away. </p>

<p>Dorming does not help you grow up faster. Dorming is a bunch of kids in summer camp - you sleep in your little bunk beds in your tiny cabins, get your snacks/meals served to you and pre-paid, you can get out of bed 5 mins before class and run across the street. You will learn laundry though, which I find ridiculous since I’ve been doing my laundry for years and some of my friends are like, “So I finally learned to wash my clothes!” LOL :)</p>

<p>If you want to be independent and feel like an adult, move off-campus to an apartment/studio. No more summer camp atmosphere, you’re living on your own, cooking, cleaning, harder to manage time. If you’re living at home, it all depends on your parents. I still have a lot of home responsibilites, like cooking meals 3 times a week for my family, babysitting my brother sometimes, cleaning, etc. But on top of that I have to manage spending 90-110min a day commuting and a part-time job. Some of my dorm friends just sleep half the day, roll out of bed and go to class, then stay up half the night sitting around drinking. It encourages a sloth lifestyle more than responsbility. </p>

<p>If you’re planning on Med, Law, or Grad School, saving money can be worth it. But I reccommend you find an off-campus place by your 3rd/4th year. It will make you a LOT more independent.</p>

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<p>I figure I’ll ask in this thread… Does anyone have advice for someone who is going to commute (and not that I shouldn’t commute, because that advice isn’t going to help me)?</p>

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<p>I’d definitely not go as far as saying that it is encouraged.</p>

<p>As for the summer camp example, I see summer camp as a more independent experience than spending the summer at your parents’ house. </p>

<p>Living in dorms won’t make you independent, just as taking an art class won’t make you an artist, and buying a gun won’t make you a marksman. But all of those steps can dramatically make a difference. You’d be a fool to argue that living in the dorms doesn’t cause people to mature, and gain a sense of independence.</p>

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<p>Only read thread title, and I would never consider commuting. Dorming is a must for me.</p>

18

<p>I live around 45 minutes from Uni, and sometimes it can be a hassle for me. I am well aware that I have a little less time to do what I want, to be with my friends and my close guy friend. Still, I didn’t go on with my past decision on having a dorm room or living with my aunt and uncle. I don’t want to be far from my mother anyway. She’s sweet and awesome. Also, it will be difficult for me as I have all my resources here at home.</p>

<p>I was offered to live with my aunt and uncle, but I thought that I’d be too much of a bother for them. They manage several stores, and I don’t want to get in the way.</p>

<p>Besides, commuting helps me clear my mind on a lot of things. I see people I don’t know, and somehow it makes me a little calmer upon remembering that I’m not the only one who is stressed with the traffic.</p>

19

<p>I commute about 45 min to an hour to my school and I have to say that I enjoy it very much regardless of the negatives people warned me about. Really I feel as if I have not missed out on anything and I get so many added benefits that the residential students do not. </p>

<p>Riding on the train is probably my favorite part of the day because it allows me to escape from school and just prepare for the day or relax after. If I lived there, it would seem as if I had to work 24/7. I know that when riding the train it forces me to relax and experience other things in life. The people on campus only get to experience the campus basically whereas I get to explore the real world. I walk the streets and interact with professionals whereas everyone else is almost cut off from the real world. Make sure to join a club or something though to ensure you get social interaction. Most days I am on campus from 9 in the morning to almost 6 at night. It is not like I go to class only and go home. I do work there, I eat there, I hang out with people. Then I get to go home and have good food to eat and spend time with family. Over the weekends I hang out with my real friends and partake in my activities.</p>

<p>Added benefits include home cooked meals, no laundry, private room (I know I would get better sleep in my own bed rather than a dorm), private bathroom (dorm bathrooms gross me out), spend time with my family and younger siblings, can still partake in my sports/community service/religious activities, and can still hang out with my friends that are younger than me and decided to stay home too.</p>

<p>Commuting is great, nothing to worry about.</p>

20

<p>Well, that IS a hard decision. I experienced both. I received a scholarship to pay for my housing, but now, I’m moved out and commuting. To me, ~10k a year isn’t worth a tiny room and staying out all night. I had to pay for part of the housing, and since I plan on studying abroad next year, I’m going to save money for that. Since you want to go to graduate school, that’ll really come in handy. Even though money isn’t a problem, you never know what will happen down the line, and you can always dorm next year or something if you feel that you’ll miss out. </p>

<p>Good luck!</p>