Could someone please grade this PSAT essay out of 6?

<p>Prompt: Can knowledge be a burden rather than a benefit?</p>

<pre><code>Knowledge in itself is neither beneficial nor harmful; it is truth, and truth is not an idea developed from moral biasties. However, how we utilise knowledge is what can label it as good or evil . Examples from literature and history demonstrate both the beneficial power of knowledge, and its harmful use.

In the ancient Greek play "Prometheus Bound", Aeschylus demonstrates the power of knowledge. Prometheus, a minor god, is threatened by Zeus with eternal physical pain if he doesn't apologise for giving the gift of fire to men. Prometheus knows, however, that he will one day be released from his anguish with the arrival of Io's son. While Prometheus has this relieving knowledge, Zeus can only anticipate the future. "Thus the ignorant must show their ignorance" Prometheus tells him as Zeus attempts to use his physical power to force Prometheus into submission. "Prometheus Bound" demonstrates the power knowledge has over any worldly strength and the benefit it gives to its bearer.

Knowledge, however, like all powers, can also be abused. During the Cold War of 1946, the US and the USSR began a dangerous race to military superiority. America was the fist to develop the atomic bomb, which they used to devastating affect in Hiroshima. The atomic bomb consisted of an extremely complex chemical reaction which had taken scientists decades to discover. THis knowledge of atoms, however, became lethal when it was used by the US and USSR as offensive means. The near-disastrous result of the Cold War exemplified the detrimental affects the abuse of knowledge can have.

Knowledge is a great power, but it is up to us as users whether it is beneficial or harmful. "Prometheus Bound" showed us the beneficial power of knowledge, but the Cold War showed us the destructiveness of the use of some knowledge. Because knowledge itself does not take a moral stance, we must make sure it is used to mankind's benefit.
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<p><strong><em>Thanks to anyone who could give me an educated estimate of a score I would get :)</em></strong></p>

<p>Ehhh, there’s good parts and parts I’m not so sure about. The 2nd paragraph is a weird way of expressing the benefits of knowledge because I read that all the god had to do was apologize, but he didn’t and took the pain instead because he knew it wouldn’t last? So…I don’t really get it. The harm of knowledge is pretty straightforward so that works fine, but the way you wrote it is on the weaker end as writing goes because it feels a bit repetitive and quite ambiguous as far as how destructive it actually was (it’s like you’re assuming the reader knows, maybe).</p>

<p>Overall, it’s not bad, but not very good, I’m afraid. Oh, I like how you said “The effects of knowledge depend on how it’s used” thing though.</p>

<p>My estimate: 4/6</p>

<p>First of all,
2nd body paragraph, or 3rd paragraph, was “not-actual-fact” or perhaps
the situation where your “knowledge” became “lethal” in your essay.</p>

<p>Yes, you are correct.
Cold War was a state of political hostility between US and USSR,
but Atomic Bomb is a different story; Atomic Bomb was used during World War II, when Japan bombed Pearl Harbor… and Franklin Roosevelt became indignant about it. </p>

<p>When the essay reader reads your 3rd paragraph,
the reader will mock and say that “this writer does not have “good” knowledge…”
hope that you can fix your “knowledge” that you have right now, to improve yourself.</p>

<p>Overall, it was okay, qualifying a good side and a bad side,
but introduction and conclusion seem not compelling and strong enough…
sorry about that, and I am not also a good writer o.o…</p>

<p>perfect practices make you perfect!
keep going!
I would give you 3.5/6</p>

<p>You started with Knowledge for three paragraphs. dont explicitly say “Examples from literature and history demonstrate”. Use a lot of impressive vocab words honestly, average sat grader spends around 12 seconds per essay, they look at the important stuff. For this I would say around a 3 to a 4. Look at the “How to get a 12 on the essay in 10 days thread”, it will be useful.</p>

<p>Thanks for all the responses guys. I really appreciate the help!</p>

<p>Wow, I never realised when I was writing it how I started with “knowledge” so many times. Thanks for pointing it out!</p>

<p>There is no essay on the PSAT.</p>

<p>Oh, I know there’s no essay on the PSAT, but this wasn’t an official PSAT - merely a “practice SAT” from the Collegeboard prep book.</p>

<p>4…</p>

<p>5…my essays were way worse and I never referenced anything, so I’m assuming you’d get a 5</p>