<p>My son had one counselor for his first 2 years and now has a new one due to a re-alignment at the high school. He really does not have good rapport with the new one--who is the football coach and is really more focused on that. Son is not an athlete and feels that the counselor does not listen to him. Son has reached out to the counselor a few times and has come away rather frustrated.dc</p>
<p>Son wants to apply to some very selective schools. He has taken a challenging schedule and has an excellent upward trend. But, he knows that counselor recommendation will be an important part of his application.</p>
<p>He has considered talking to his previous counselor to see if he could continue to see her, but just isn't sure how to proceed.</p>
<p>Son is a great kid, but not a jock and I think the current counselor does not really want to invest time into getting to know him.</p>
<p>Does your hs gave forms that the kids and parents fill out? Our hs has the kids fill out an on-line form on Naviance - the parents do the same thing. So - we can give the counselor a lot of info that we want her to incorporate into the counselor evaluation. Schools that don’t have Naviance often do the same thing - just using paper forms.</p>
<p>I don’t see any harm in your son talking to the previous counselor on an unofficial basis - but the one who is assigned to him will have to do the letter.</p>
<p>Don’t stress too much over this. Colleges are well aware that the letters they get from a hs with 100 seniors and the letters coming from a hs with 600 seniors will differ in quality and length. Counselors leave mid-year or get switched all the time. </p>
<p>Just try to feed the info you want included in the letter to the new counselor. If your hs does not have the type of procedure I described above - there is nothing stopping you from doing it anyway - along the lines of your son giving him a resume, etc., - anything that will make the counselor’s job easier and help you get the info you want into the recommendation.</p>
<p>Most counselors at public high schools do not know the kids. The counselor recommendation mainly consists of the school record and school profile. It is not expected to be deep or personal.</p>
<p>Your son should find 2 teachers who LOVE him, and can right very personal and meaningful recommendations. I would not worry about the counselor.</p>
<p>In general I agree, but some big public schools do manage to get counselor recommendations that are a little better than just the school record and profile. Spring junior year our college counselors ask parents, students and two teachers to give them information about each student. That information gets incorporated into the counselor’s letter. It may be that your school has a similar system that gets around the problem that most counselors only know the academic stars and the discipline problems.</p>
<p>This is where a private high school can make a difference!! My daughter had extremely personal letters from teachers and counselors with alot of detail .Good luck!!</p>
<p>My kid had the only decent counselor at her public and then was reassigned (based on first letter of last name) to a different counselor when they did one of their adjustments. This other counselor was absolutely clueless and of no help at all when it came to colleges (this is the one to whom I had to explain how UC admissions worked and what their requirements were). In my D’s case the former counselor did know her. She simply went to the old one to have any reqs done. I had already asked him if it’d be okay and sort of let him know what I thought of the clueless counselor. He didn’t seem to mind that she asked him for them and maybe even felt more appreciated. </p>
<p>I say go ahead and have your S talk to the former counselor and just be up front and explain that the new couselor doesn’t really know him and he’d be very appreciative if the former one would do some reqs for him. Worst case the former one will tell your S he can’t (or won’t) do it.</p>
<p>Kids get new counselors every year for a variety of reasons; counselors are added to the staff, counselors leave the staff, the staff has been restructured. This is a situation where your son can either curse the darkness or he can light a candle.</p>
<p>What is your son doing to try to build a relationship with his counselor - it is a two way street. Has he made an appointment to see the counselor? If he is going to be frustrated so easily, then he is setting himself up for a world of disappointment. Yes, it takes time and yes it may take some work to cultivate a relationship. Is he willing to roll up his sleeves and do the work? He has to also take into consideration timing. Did he try to see the counselor at the beginning of the year when everyone is returning to school, getting program changes and talking about grades from the past spring? This may not have been a good time.</p>
<p>He needs to be proactive in this process (as yes, the squeaky wheel does get the grease). He can pop in and introduce himself when it not so busy and tell the counselor that he is looking forward to working with him this year. He can ask the counselor what is it that you will need from me in order to help you write my recommendation and then start working at gathering those things.</p>
<p>He can ask his old counselor if there is a process that they all use when comes to writing recommendation letters. If there is a brag sheet, or an activity sheet, your son can ask the old counselor if he can have one. He can start working on an annotated resume and an activity sheet for his counselor.</p>
<p>He can also ask the old counselor if she can do a write up to give to the new counselor.</p>
<p>I would not so lightly tell your son, to don’t worry about the counselor because at the end of the day it is the counselor who is going to be your son’s advocate in the college process (especially if there is a deferral or a waitlist incolved) and the person that the college is going to reach out to if there are any questions.</p>
<p>At our small (excellent) public HS, the new-counselor thing happened to my S as well.</p>
<p>Being an excellent school, the school itself had a plan for this, having the old counselor work with the new counselor for the ~50 seniors this would affect. This might not be possible at a larger school, but it’s certainly not too much to ask, as others have suggested… by your S or you talking to the old counselor or head of that department or whatever.</p>
<p>If you haven’t already, you might also check how your school goes about having the counselor recs composed. At out HS, the counselor reviewed the recs which the student had requested from 2 teachers. The counselor also had a form which asked all other current teachers (can’t remember if prior teachers were included) to make brief comments about the student. The counselor then used all of this input to compose her rec… she would include quotes from some of the teachers if it really helped create a portrait of the student. Maybe your school does this, mitigating to some extent the new-counselor problem.</p>
<p>Thanks for all of the suggestions and comments. I agree that the teacher recs really need to be fantastic and I think he is in good shape there. It is good to know that he won’t be the only kid with a potentially poor counselor recommendation.</p>
<p>He is a good kid–never in trouble, and works really hard at school. </p>
<p>Sybbie: My son has made appoinmentts and has met with the counselor on at least 3 occaisions now. My son proactively went to the counselor about doing an independent study writing class on which one of the AP teachers had agreed to work with him. He is trying to get htis set up for his senior year. The counselor did not believe that my son had talked to the teacher in advance or that the teacher had agreed to do it. </p>
<p>I agree that this will be a good lesson for life as we often have to work or interact with people we don’t always get along with. I feel like he has really tried and this counselor is not even meeting him half way. I would think counselors would enjoy talking to kids with big dreams and would want to discuss how they can help them get there. </p>
<p>it just seems like this particular counselor does not have a productive relationship at all with my son. My son has tried reaching out and is not getting anywhere. </p>
<p>I will talk with him about approaching the previous counselor–maybe my son and the current counselor can agree that their interactions are not optmal so another solution should be found.</p>
<p>Your son should set up an appointment with the counselor and give the counselor his resume. He should then explain that he has an upward trend and that he is applying to selective colleges, and that the resume should help the counselor know some things about him.
It is in the school’s interest for counselors to write good recommendations. Good luck!</p>
<p>Definitely your son can make it easy on the Coach by providing a resume. Son can also ask his favorite teacher to email the counselor with insights/words to use. </p>
<p>I know you want your student to do the legwork himself (good on you!), but in a similar situation I did email a new counselor and said something like “S is applying to some challenging schools and things like your letter may really make a difference. I am nervous because I know you are new to knowing my kid. Please let us know if there is anything we should be providing for you to make this task go better.” </p>
<p>It’s not threatening or whiney – but it does put the staff member on notice that you are playing close attention to the situation. You can also drop by the counseling center (with S’s approval) with a box of brownies and a note that says “I know you have a lot of letters to get out and I want you to know how much your work is appreciated.” Again, it is saying that you are paying attention, in a nice way.</p>
<p>Our counselors require each student who wants a recommendation to turn in a counseling packet. Kids have to answer a number of short answer questions (interests, future plans, words that describe them, strengths, etc.), turn in a resume along with the names of 3 teachers the counselors can consult about the recommendation. Parents also must turn in a sheet on which we give 4 different words that describe our kid and any stories that illustrate our points and also a heads up on any challenges in the home that might need to be covered in the recommendation.</p>
<p>You can see how even a GC who hasn’t known your kid for a long time can write an informative letter. I’d ask whether there is a counselor packet that could be filled out.</p>
<p>Our public HS has about 650 kids in the senior class. Colleges take into account that school GCs may not know an applicant personally. Tell your son to keep trying to build a relationship. Now that football season is over, GC should have more time.</p>
<p>I met my GC for the first time when I asked them to write my college recommendation. I had had a different one every year from 9-12, so I never got to know any of them very well. I got into a number of top schools, and really don’t think the counselor recommendation accounts for much.</p>
<p>(I guess for the record, my school had around 700 kids graduating a year with two counselors splitting all of those students up.)</p>
<p>Each family in our public school of 300/each class is scheduled for a “college planning” conference with the counselors. There are also evening presentations for parents on the college application process and financial aid. The parents have an opportunity to meet with the counselor with their kid, to talk about their kid’s applications and anything in particular that the counselor needs to know. The counselors review grades and test scores, and make school suggestions. The high school keeps a record from freshman year for each kid of all awards, activities/clubs and other things that may be relevant, but many students also bring a resume of all of their outside activities, club leadership and other things that they want their counselor to know in the meeting. It’s also a chance to alert the counselor about other particular circumstances (first generation college, unusual adversities, a first choice if a call from the counselor might help the application, etc.) </p>
<p>I suggest that you make an appointment with the counselor and go with your kid. The attention you get as parents asking for the counselor to work with your kid is very different from the attention your kid gets as one of a crowd.</p>
<p>The counselors at our big public sch. do very little. PackSon had great class rank,scores, ec’s,etc. just like most here on CC. He had a new counselor for senior yr.<br>
On one of S’s college apps., the counselor wrote…“PackSon” is an outstanding student". That was it, five words. S did get good reqs from teachers who knew him. S got into all the schools he applied to and ended up with a fullride. His counselor’s comments or lack thereof, didn’t hurt him.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t worry too much about it, because your son is not alone in this. My D’s counselor could not pick her out of a lineup, and he’s been her counselor for 3 years. This is largely my D’s fault, as she is shy and has never sought him out, and with hundreds of students on his plate, he’s not going to seek her out. I think this is the case in most large public schools. He will get information for his recommendation from the Naviance forms that we and D fill out, and from the teachers who are writing her recommendations.</p>
<p>The truth of the matter is that your kid is at a disadvantage as compared to where he would be with a counselor who knew him well , wrote well, knew what the colleges wanted to see in terms of recs, and was truly pushing for your child. I think you know this. </p>
<p>The fact of the matter is that most kids are in the situation of your kid, so it is the rare bird that gets all of those advantages. The best he can do is to provide a very comprehensive, easy to use “cheat sheet” (sorry, bad label, it’s not cheating at all) for the counselor to use when writing the rec. that can make the big difference. These counselors have many, many of these danged things to write and if s/he doesn’t know your kid, is tired, has writer’s block, etc, your kid is likely to get the short shrift. If the counselor can just paraphrase something in front of his face and get it done, that is likely what will happen.</p>
<p>I really wouldn’t worry about it. GCs at large publics have hundreds of kids and can’t possibly know them all well. Adcoms are aware of this. As long as your son doesn’t have any black marks on his record, he won’t be negatively impacted.</p>