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<p>YES. D. Really, I probably would have run away with my boyfriend if my parents had kept me at home and forced me to attend our local school vs go away to college – and THEN where would I be? Shudder.</p>
<p>JHS, you are brilliant. Your post is the definitive word on the subject, IMHO. Thank you! </p>
<p>My only caveat: I don’t know too many “personal” detail’s of D’s relationship - and I don’t want to - but I think she and her BF think of themselves as more like “soul mates” than “sex partners.” I’d change your last sentence to: The presence or absence of a particular bf/gf isn’t a whole lot dumber or more misleading than any of those other factors. 
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<p>That phrasing stood out to me, too. As I think it was supposed to. It does have just the tiniest whiff of “well, you might *call *it more than that, but we know what it’s *really *about.” Or maybe not; I could be wrong.</p>
<p>But overall, JHS’s usual wisdom.</p>
<p>I just started to look at CC this year as I have kids applying to college. CC is generally too much information, but it has been helpful about some colleges I didn’t know that much about. </p>
<p>My only recommendation is that the two kids really want to go to the same college and would be happy there if the don’t stay together. This is not easy for a 17 or 18 year old to discern. Most likely they will not stay together, so they need to make independent decisions. Other than that advice, the parents should stay out of it.</p>
<p>But some hs students will stay together.</p>
<p>I speak from experience. I met my wife the beginning of 10th grade. I was told by her friends that she was a very good student and interested in many academic subjects. I was just a normal boy who had done well in 9th grade. I spent 10th grade doing well in school and reading in many different areas so that I would have many things to talk to her about. She always inspired me to do well in school. Finally in 11th grade we were in many classes and started going out. We were choir partners and lab partners.</p>
<p>When it came time for college she applied to 4 colleges (Harvard, Princeton, University of Chicago, Michigan and Carleton.) Back in the 1970’s, students actually applied to many fewer colleges than today. I came from a family of modest means and applied to only two colleges: Harvard and University of Chicago. We both got in to our colleges and were the two students from our school and city (in Michigan) to get into Harvard. (I told my Harvard interviewer that my girlfriend was applying and that she had been a strong influence on me and I would appreciate it if Harvard accepted both of us. I would not recommend this tact today.) Our families became very close in high school.</p>
<p>In college, we decided to just be friends freshman and sophomore years. We dated other people, but remained close friends those two years and spent time together. It was really good to have each other while we met many new friends. We both sort of assumed that we would eventually get back together and we did junior year. The year after college we got married. </p>
<p>We have been married 27 years and have four children. We live in the same city we grew up in. At our 25th college reunion, there was a short slide show about us because it was an unusual story.</p>
<p>By the way, I have read some negative comments about Harvard on CC. Much of it seems quite ill-informed. I found Harvard to be an exciting place to go to college in the late 1970’s and early 1980’s. (I was in a smaller department.) I found the professors interesting and concerned about students. I made many close friends–and we still spend time together. I would have enjoyed college at many places, but I had a really good time at college. Because my parents had little money, the financial aid was excellent. I am very, very grateful for the opportunities Harvard provided to me. I took advantage of all these opportunities. I will encourage my kids to apply if they are interested, but I am most interested for them to find a college that suits them. College is ultimately what they make of it.</p>
<p>postman - that’s a great love story. Of course, I couldn’t believe you told the interviewer about your girlfriend. Today’s youth would have been too polished or groomed to say that.</p>
<p>I agree that it’s too early and there are too many variables here to worry about this now.</p>
<p>In general, I don’t think going to the same school as H.S. BF/GF is a good idea,I will admit that I attended college with several couples who had been high school sweethearts. Almost all of them married the one they were with then and are still together.</p>
<p>Oh! I forgot the coda to my story (post #34).
Knowing that I preferred NU > Penn, but knowing that my parents had a strong bias for Penn > NU (both because we were originally from Phila but also because they did not care for boyfriend), I figured that if I didn’t get into Penn, I’d “have” to go to NU.
So I deliberately didn’t complete an essay, figuring that I’d get rejected and then we couldn’t have that fight. Not only did I get in, I got accepted to an honors program within Wharton that was a 5 year BA / MBA. LOL. The kids knocking down the doors to get into Wharton these days would die if they hear that someone “threw” an application and still got in!! It was so different then …</p>