crisis!!..friends who aren't academically oriented

<p>do u guys have some friends who just don't give a freak about school or homework even though they're in honors/AP classes??
i study extra hard in school and get good grades
but then some of these friends annoy me because they think that i shouldnt be studying so much and it's not fair that they don't do as well as me in school
they think that "normal" people should be hanging out with friends and having fun everyday
i mean, i can see why they don't do as well in school because they slack off, and complain about work and blah blah blah</p>

<p>just because they don't have the motivation to do well in school doesn't mean they have to bag on me because i do well!!
ughh this is frustrating
i have a few friends who are as academically motivated as me and they are great study buddies and company</p>

<p>has anyone else been in this frustrating situation?? advice??</p>

<p>Maybe they're jealous. Whenever someone asks you if you studied for a test, say no (even though you did). There's a difference between being known as the "naturally smart" kid, and the "studious" kid. </p>

<p>Hanging out everyday is an impossibility for most students with even a shred of ambition.</p>

<p>Yeah, I have a couple good friends who aren't as academically motivated as I am. I set aside time to hang out and have fun with them, and for that reason they respect it when I feel I have to study or do homework.</p>

<p>It's worked for me. It might not work for you, I don't know. It depends on the people.</p>

<p>Meh. 95% of my friends are either getting their GED or going to CCol. I do have a very small percent of friends in my honors/AP classes with me. You just have to learn how to balance. srgirl is right. You have to set aside a few hours, or maybe a Saturday or something. You just absolutely cannot push your views that school is first onto them or else you'll push them away. (They have to respect that you need your study time, but you can't tell them that they have to study. Make sense?)</p>

<p>yeah, and i dont want to be the type of person who parties all the time and never takes school work seriously
it seems like i'm the only person out of my group of friends who even studies for the SATs and stuff
it just bugs me!! i can't help but think they they're wasting their life away by messing around all the time!! sometimes i just don't want to hang around these people because they have different values than me
and several times i've had the urge to lecture my friends on the importance of doing well in school
it's really frustrating
and yeah..i think they're jealous that i get higher grades and stuff
but compared to the amount of time i study for my classes, my good grades are well deserved in my opinion</p>

<p>sometimes, i want to completely give up my social life and concentrate 100% of my energy on studying so that I can get into a prestigious college. I honestly believe that one of the best moments in your life is receiving that harvard/yale/stanford/princeton/MIT/etc.. acceptance letter in the mail. I'd give up everything else to experience that moment..well not EVERYTHING... but yeah.. you know what i mean..</p>

<p>^ You can think they're wasting their lives, but they probably think you're wasting yours. School, despite what everybody says, is not going to make or break your life, your ambition is, whatever form that ambition takes. You NEED to find a balance, because all work and no play is not good for you either. </p>

<p>You cannot lecture them. If it bothers you THAT much, you honestly may want to find a group of friends who shares your views more.</p>

<p>EDIT: And you need to have a social life or you're going to have a breakdown. Is it really worth the Ivies if you have no friends? Seriously. That is a twisted set of priorities. When you're lying on your death bed are you really going to be thinking "Man, I wish I could've studied for those SATs more" or are you going to be thinking "Wow, I really wish I could've had some more time with friends."?</p>

<p>And why do YOU want to get in to those colleges? So you can brag? What about what YOU want? Are you sure you WANT to go to one of those? Maybe you'll get there and decide "Wow, this is what I worked for? I wish I could've gone to [insert college name here] because I could've done [insert program name here]." Remember that you have to spend FOUR years of your life at a college, don't go just because you like being able to say "I go to [insert name of Ivy here]."</p>

<p>Lawl I dated this one guy for like eight months who was in decent classes but never did homework or cared, so when I was all "sigh I can't see you 'til I do my hw~" he was like "GRRR."</p>

<p>My current boyfriend puts, like, all of his time and effort into schoolwork and shiz, even in the summer, and I get frustrated that it always comes first... like, before me... :( so I guess I know how my ex felt...</p>

<p>I can totally relate. Most of my friends just don't care and they depend on me to "help" them with their homework and stuff. I don't mind doing stuff for them, because they also do a lot of favors for me. I just can't stand it when they start nagging me about how invested I am into school stuff; or when they give me the silent treatment for not being able to hang out.</p>

<p>So, our solution: never talk about school when around each other. It bugs me sometimes because I want to know that we're all in the same boat. But whatever, it's their lives.</p>

<p>I know it's hard for some of you to believe, but there are more important things than school. Do you want to tell you children and grandchildren that all you did in high school was study? Or do you want crazy, drunken stories to tell them? Even if partying isn't your thing, do something spontaneous. Take a road trip. Sneak out. Stargaze instead of doing homework. Fail a test. It's not that big of a deal.</p>

<p>Having friends who aren't all about school is a good thing. It'll give you balance. You don't want to burn out before you've even started college.</p>

<p>haha i don't have time for a boyfriend nowadays
but i would definately rather have a boyfriend who gets good grades and cares about school</p>

<p>another thing that bugs me is that some of my friends say that next year they won't slack off anymore and they decide to take all these ap classes. but i'd be like..hello??? you could not possibly handle all of those ap classes with your motivation level..seriously, they're not gonna change in one year
saying you'll do something is ten times easier than actually doing it</p>

<p>and then there are the people at my school who believe that they can get into the ivy leagues with extremely bad grades (b's,c's), horrendous test scores and only one AP class
i really think those people should get a reality check (btw, they're not legacies or millionaries either)</p>

<p>I have some friends like this; nearly all my class has that attitude actually! Most of the time, they're jealous but sometimes, they just don't have the same ambition you might have. I mean it's good to hang out sometimes, but every day might be impossible if you have tons of assignments and homework. I help them sometimes but my best friend usually abuses that, so I try to not do homework around her. And I'm the one of the only here that wants to go to university.</p>

<p>I usually do my homework in my spare time at school or at home, read the book I was assigned to read in the bus, etc... Due to this, I have lots of time to do whatever want and still have an A average. It works for me... But most of the time, my friends waste their time and slack, then whine about how they had a worse grade than they wanted.</p>

<p>yepp.. and another thing i hate is when my friends expect me to help them on homework(especially math homework, hence my username)
and basically if you make it into the ivy league, you have much better changes of being successful than someone who graduated from a state college
you'd have a great alumni network
even if you decide that you want to study to be a professor in an academic field(such as math) you'll fare fine in the future with a degree from an ivy league. plus, an ivy league professor gets paid a lot of money</p>

<p>it's work the toiling and effort, i truely believe that.
if i didn't work as hard as i could in high school, that would be the one and only thing i regret</p>

<p>sure, if i performed my BEST in highschool and didn't make it into the ivy league, i wouldn't be disappointed. I would be much happier knowing that i was at least a qualified applicant and would still have a very high chance of making it into a second/third tier school.</p>

<p>i mean, i don't regret not having more friends in middle school or in my freshman/sophomore years</p>

<p>i regret that i didn't read more and study more, because those years were kinda wasted</p>

<p>Almost all but a very few of my friends are that way, but most of them aren't even in my AP/honors classes. I have one friend that was in AP and honors classes and she was 18 in tenth grade last year and couldn't care less about school (she got pregnant half way during the year then had a miscarriage a few months later). She came to school once back in eighth grade drunk. Also, she loves the party scene way too much (we are practically polar opposites). But I do have a few really motivated/smart friends who are (and one who is really smart but not) in my AP/honors classes.</p>

<p>good grades+good test scores+diligence+extracurricular involvement+challenging courses= good college application, agree?</p>

<p>then,
good college application=acceptance into a good college</p>

<p>acceptance into a good college=more promising future, good alumni connections better change of a high end career</p>

<p>which translates into happiness, and fulfillment in life</p>

<p>it doesn't take a math genius to figure out that if any one of those factors are taken out from the equation, the answer will not come out right.</p>

<p>by far, bad test scores will have a more negligient effect than not having several more friends or attending several more parties, agreed?</p>

<p>i say, why risk it? work your butt off in school
hard work pays off</p>

<p>"acceptance into a good college=more promising future, good alumni connections better change of a high end career</p>

<p>which translates into happiness, and fulfillment in life"</p>

<p>Not for everyone. Yeah, your logic works when aligned to your own personal views of happiness. No argument here; just saying that this "formula" doesn't apply to everyone.</p>

<p>yeah i know=/
it's good to see that most people on CC have similar academics values though</p>

<p>Huh. In my group of friends, I'm the one who doesn't really care that much, and all my friends study like CRAZY but we all get like the same grades. I'm pulling off salutatorian right now, so I'm happy, and I've found my balance of work/play - with play being the larger of the two :]</p>

<p>mostly agree with romanigypsyeyes, quite a bit of my friends aren't the "intellectual" type, but then again, i'm not really either...</p>

<p>Just try to spend some time with them and don't push your views on them.</p>

<p>

Hahahha that perfectly describes my life. :D The whole "haha you study like crazy and we both have 4.0s, law of diminishing marginal returns lolol" thing comes up a lot in fights with my boyfriend. ^__^</p>