Critique for 2 personal essay drafts!

College Essays
1

<p>Its about a significant event and its impact, but I have two different drafts. I'd like to know which is better and I'd like it to be critiqued.</p>

<p>I'd prefer '10 or people who have already submitted or are even in college :)</p>

<p>Thanks!</p>

2

<p>I actually have three different hooks that I think could work well, but the thing is, I like them all equally and dont know which would be the most effective.</p>