Critique my Statement of Purpose- Public History M.A. Program

Graduate School
1

<p>Just finished my first draft. Comments?</p>

<p>I hated history in high school. It was so boring! M family always assumed I’d be an engineer like my dad; I took AP Calculus my junior year. Despite taking AP U.S. History, I just didn’t think I was interested in history.</p>

<p>On the other hand, I loved going to estate auctions and buying antiques. Walking around in old houses, I thought “If these walls could talk…” I loved to research my finds, and became an eBay seller at the age of ten. I just didn’t connect that with history until I got to Willamette. That was my first exposure to history that wasn’t just dry boring facts to memorize. It was also my first exposure to social history, cultural history, women’s history, the history of race… basically anything that wasn’t about old white guys. This was fascinating! At Willamette I took a Local History Practicum course with my advisor, Professor Ellen Eisenberg, under whose guidance I wrote a paper on the treatment of Chinese immigrants in the Oregon legal system of the late 1800’s. In researching this paper I used archival sources at the Oregon State Archives and the Oregon Historical Society, my first exposure to primary source research.</p>

<p>During my time at Willamette I also became interested in the history of the western United States; this area is well represented in the graduate-level history courses available at PSU, particularly with the Center for Columbia River History and the Pacific Historical Review, and in the course Race and the American West. The Public History Field School at Fort Vancouver would allow me to gain real-world public history experience in western history.
My interest in museums, however, took longer to develop. It wasn’t until the beginning of my senior year, when I received an email about an internship available at a museum just across the street from school, that it clicked. During that internship I created a database of the museum’s collections; many of these items were the very same things I had been selling on eBay and seeing in antique stores for years!</p>

<p>The Public History program at Portland State University fits my desire to make history more accessible, less about dry facts to memorize from a book and more about displaying “stuff” that has stories to tell. The mix of courses in archival management, museology, and interpretation particularly fit my interest in bringing history alive, as well as my experience handling artifacts. I would love to find a position in a museum where I can use antiques to make a historical story come alive.</p>

2

<p>Conveys excitement, does not convey intellectual capacity or familiarity with research methodologies, historiography, etc. </p>

<p>Expand on archival work. Expand on work on database (of exactly what in collections) at "across the street" museum (of what?).</p>

<p>With whom, exactly, do you wish to study at Portland State? Why? What is it exactly about her research you find to be compelling? How does it dovetail with your scholarly and career goals?</p>

<p>There's a start for your second draft.
Best wishes to you.</p>

3

<p>I thought that the first two paragraphs were a bit weak. I would cut them out and focus more on your transformative experience at Willamette. What was it about social, cultural, and racial history that got you excited? Were there any courses or authors that you found particularly exciting?</p>

<p>An alternative might be to start with a particularly exciting sell on Ebay and then segue into your discovery of museums. Why do you find museums exciting? Is it the connection to the past? Is it the ability to shape public perception of history, perhaps highlighting the experiences of minorities? You allude to these things but you never specifically state why museums. </p>

<p>Make sure you answer Professor X's questions as well. They will be very important to your SOP.</p>

4

<p>The first paragraph is a big cliche- everyone knows that history classes can be boring in high school. I've been there. Use the opening paragraph as an opportunity to show your reader what exactly about history (or area of history) interests you? It could reveal the reason why you're choosing to do your MA in Public History. Remember writing your college essays? It's a bit similar except that SOPs for grad school are much more professional and requires a certain amount of jargon.</p>

<p>Definitely follow Prof X's suggestions and expand more on your experience that your CV and transcript don't tell enough of.</p>