<p>My D is excited about UM, but has some concerns about focus on flash, hookups, too much partying, lack of relationships. This concern was reinforced by the comment below made by a current student who has been nice enough to answer questions. Do other current students agree? </p>
<p>Quote:</p>
<p>"Well, save the random frat/soro exchange most good looking girls down here (and believe me this school is getting hotter every freakin year it seems) don't want relationships. Good looking girls, if you are reading this, you will see what I mean when you get here. You see, while you may club with the same group every week, why tie yourself down? So many good looking people, you can get laid by whoever / whenever you want. And if you are a hot female, the club doors magically open everywhere. Plus, if you are ultra into your studies and gunning for law, business, med, grad school you don't have time to get wasted, so you never really have time to associate and make these relationships. Its not like the IVY League where everyone sees things the same way and is looking for a partner to spend their life with. </p>
<p>Bottom line, UMiami resembles Miami itself. Lots of external flash (people try to show off beyond their means), lots of random hookups, little true relationships. The GOOD does exist though if you look hard enough."</p>
<p>Two years ago I was in your shoes. Reading all the random posts and afraid that my down to earth, non-partying daughter would not fit in. I am happy to report that she LOVES UM. She still does not party and has tons of friends and does lots of fun stuff. </p>
<p>Again:</p>
<p>ALL COLLEGES ARE PARTY SCHOOLS!!! Hookups are, unfortunately, the way things are today. You will find superficial, loose, partiers at all schools, but especially at ALL expensive private schools. </p>
<p>Miami is a very diverse school. Get involved in a club, etc. that really interests you and and you will find your peers.</p>
<p>You see what you look for. I’ve never seen that here, but I don’t look for it, because that’s not the kind of person I am. UM is incredibly diverse and you can find people who will fit in to any category. That is obviously the type of person the person who messaged you likes to be around, otherwise they wouldn’t know that that kind of stuff exists. If you don’t like to be around that kind of stuff, you will find your social groups elsewhere.</p>
<p>Yes, there are people like that here. There are people like that at every school in the country.</p>
<p>There are also lots of people who are not like that here. I normally wear clothes bought from target or JC Penny, and so do most of my friends.</p>
<p>I don’t really think it matters, though. Even those people who do wear brand name clothes don’t really care if you don’t. And as long as it doesn’t restrict your social interaction, there doesn’t seem to be anything wrong with wearing brand name clothes.</p>
<p>One thing I encourage everyone do do, regardless of where you go to school, is open yourself up and meet as many people as you can. If you see someone wearing abercrombie and fitch, don’t just assume they won’t like you. Because they very well might!</p>
<p>In terms of shallowness and fakeness, I don’t know many people who are. But, I can tell you that there are people who aren’t shallow and fake. Plenty of them. And I presume that those are the people you will hang out with.</p>
<p>At just about every school you go to, there will be a wide variety of people. You choose who you hang out with. Going to Miami, your options will not be restricted in the slightest.</p>
<p>This is the one thing I am worried about at U Miami. I don’t want to not go there simply because of this reputation the school seems to have. It just seems like a lot of the students are shallow, into appearances and expensive clothes, and partying. Is this true? I’m not totally sure. : /</p>
<p>Edit: Okay, even though Urban dictionary says that Blargh can mean whatever you want it to and, therefore, I have already said everything that I want to say, I suppose you may not know what I intended to say. Lol. :P</p>
<p>Anyway, visit UM for yourself. That’s the only way you can really tell. As I’ve already said, I don’t think most people here are shallow.</p>
<p>SVMMom, I’m working on an FAQ as I type. I have four pages in MS Word done… If you can think of any questions that people ask frequently, please let me know :)</p>
<p>UM is pretty superficial and materialistic, but I do know lots of people that don’t fit into that category. There are SOME people that are down to earth, in steady and committed relationships and aren’t spending every weekend wasted in the Grove.</p>
<p>My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year and we spend more nights going to dinner, Midtown or hanging around my house in the Grove (or his dorm). And lucky (or unlucky for us) we get to experience all the drunks getting back to campus around 1 or 2 in the morning. I’ve made tons of friends thanks to Amnesty and ACS and they aren’t the typical Jersey girl living off daddy’s credit cards. A lot of the commuter students like myself work part-time or have internships so our schedules are a little more difficult to fit in the shopping and spa days like some other girls have the luxury of having.</p>
<p>My advice is that anyone coming to UM will make friends. Maybe not right away but you will. If you’re going to live in the dorms you have an automatic advantage but if you don’t then it’s a bit more difficult.</p>
<p>I guess I was a little strong. Please do not picture me as a pig or anything like that. You see I once pledged a frat and I am just giving you a picture of what I have seen in my four years here. My experiences that I listed above are solely for ONE group of students here, mainly the students who are NOT academically oriented. Most of these students are VERY wealthy, out of state, and are into Greek life. </p>
<p>Let me give you another perspective. I wear my pajamas to my 8am class and so do some of the girls in my class (but some also come in like they are going to the club on Lincoln BLVD). I have known the same group of student here since freshman year, they are in my major. Several of these girls that I study with are quite attractive and they DO NOT fit the description I wrote above. They don’t club every night, and they are girlfriend material. Even better they are intelligent, and they by some “magical” way had acess to old tests which was even more delightful. Needless to say, I studied with them every chance I could get. There are sorority girls that are NICE and SMART here, it just depends which sorority you are talking about. Its the same as it was in hs, peer pressure changes people and depending on your influences, you can change for the better or the worse.</p>
<p>So please don’t take what I said before as a gross generalization of the WHOLE student body. For example, I (though not a girl) am down to earth, helpful, and will be attended a top 15 medical school. I didn’t party excessively and I know plenty of people who did not also. You basically have three choices here: study, go out to the club, or try to find a special person(s) and hang around with them. Its up to your daughter to make her choices.</p>
<p>Bottom line: your daughter will be fine. THERE ARE GOOD GIRLS HERE. I PROMISE. Just don’t let her join Delta Gamma if she is really good looking…</p>