Really? Our state is highly vaccinated, and IIRC, less than 40% have gotten boosters. That’s not most people.
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The stat I have read is that about 30% of the fully vaccinated are boosted. That was in December so it might be slightly more now. Certainly not “most people”
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Someone who chooses to go to a party cannot blame anyone for the consequences, except for themselves. This is why I keep saying that one has to go ahead with one’s lifestyle choices, with full knowledge. Right now, that knowledge is that being vaxxed and boosted doesn’t mean you won’t get infected or transmit it to someone else, it just means you very likely won’t wind up in the hospital, or worse. If one is concerned about not getting infected, one doesn’t go anywhere (outside one’s own home) indoors unmasked, and even that, only when absolutely necessary, and for as short a time as possible.
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My 97 yr old MIL (who still is mobile and still has most of her faculties, though not all) has been isolated at home with one of her daughters, who now lives with her, for the entire pandemic. If she’d been in a nursing home, she’d pretty likely have died of Covid.
It’s a tough thing to balance. Some older folks, like my MIL, are “ready to go anytime.” She would rather be around people than isolated, even if that means she might get ill/die. She is if sound mind, so her wishes are respected - but I feel like risks to her health should be calculated based in the enjoyment they bring to her life.
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My mom is very happy to die of Covid if that means that she was able to spend time with her loved ones. She has lived a long life and if that’s the way she goes, she’s ok with that.
But as I told her, I don’t want to be the one that gives you Covid. And so we were careful when she was here.
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I suppose there are many “ways” to die that are not without pain and peaceful - and for the most part we don’t get to choose….but we all know that many COVID deaths are a far cry from “without pain and peaceful” and sometimes very alone.
My 88 year old mom still enjoyed daily long walks until the day she died. She admitted to me that there were sections of her walk that she didn’t like the sidewalk so she walked in the road! I couldn’t stop her from doing that daily but boy I sure pointed out the risks and possible outcomes of that habit - from broken bones to end of life! As her family member it was the least I could do.
I appreciate anyone here looking out for older folks.
My MIL sees her loved ones who are also vaxxed, boosted, and isolated, and when things were more relaxed, she saw friends who were appropriately vaxxed/boosted. But when it wasn’t safe, she didn’t, and right now, it’s not safe. But if she hadn’t done this, it’s very possible she wouldn’t still be with us - unless we’d done the same, and possibly had gone with her.
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My mom will be 90 this spring. Ds1, DIL, dh and myself decided that we would skip my sister’s larger family Christmas gathering of about a dozen, many of whom are unvaxxed or unboosted, and go see her separately at her house so that it was just the five of us for two nights at my mom’s house. It was GREAT.
I think ds1 was surprised that I made that decision to forgo the family celebration and wasn’t willing to try to bend the will of the rest of the family to get boosted, take tests, wear masks, sit outside, etc. I told him that I tried that for the first 55 years of my life, and I’m over it. He said, “But if MawMaw goes, she will still be exposed.” I agreed and said that I am not going to tell her (like I could!) that she can’t have Christmas with her other kids and grandkids and that she has agency and if she thinks that amount of risk is worth the reward then that’s on her. Spending two nights with her after she’s been at that event is doable on my personal risk vs reward scale. We all are making choices. My family might think I’m nuts, but they respect my choices.
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Working in the ICU for years, I saw a whole lot of ways to die, none of which were peaceful and pain free. I guess one could argue that submitting oneself to ICU care instead of hospice in certain situations is just creating a falsely one-sided presentation of death to the folks who routinely witness it in that environment.
My BIL did it right, I suppose. Felt very very tired one day, so decided to go to bed early. Died in his sleep. No autopsy, but strong suspicion of heart attack or failure.
I think we can acknowledge that when we venture out in public, we are taking on a risk above that of people who pretty much stay isolated in their homes. However, I’d give an extra nod of culpability to those who know they are infected and nevertheless go out in public. We know that happens, and I wouldn’t put the reasonably prudent person at the party in the same category as the willfully dangerous.
ETA: Former colleagues of mine that are still working ICU have said that Covid is a particularly awful way to die. They suffer greatly before being intubated, and some of the things that are done to keep them alive (often for weeks) are really kind of horrific.
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Yes. My beloved uncle contracted Covid just as the vaccine became available. One of his children, a charlatan anti-vaxxer, who took absolutely NO precautions, brought it to him (he was old, having mental decline, couldn’t tell them to stay away). He suffered horribly - this incredibly funny, bright, kind, sociable man started fighting the nurses until he couldn’t fight anymore. It took him about three weeks to die, and all through it, no one could be with him.
At the zoom funeral, that adult child said, “At least he didn’t suffer.” Imagine weeks of drowning in your own secretions, gasping, unable to breathe, suffocating slowly. That’s what it is to die of Covid. Unfortunately, that adult child could possibly go the same way - they think they’re protected (because the entire family had it at the time they brought it to my uncle), and yet, since that was a year ago, and they’re none of them vaxxed, Omicron could still take one of them.
Update re S18: he ventilated house (thankfully not super cold here), took a rapid test (negative), and was proactively masking on our return home. He was happy to do so. I was thrilled with his kind attitude about it. My concerns seem unwarranted now, at least as they applied to myself and other family members. Trying to esp keep S21 Covid free for his return to school test next week.
Meanwhile 86yo MIL tested positive. She does not use much Covid caution. While she is vaccinated and boosted, her neighborhood friends now also positive are not. In fact, they are anti vaxxers. They are feeling a lot worse than she is. And they all were out and about together all week. I hope those friends isolate like MIL is doing.
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How’s that daughter doing?
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Why not spend two nights with her before she went to the family event?
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Great to hear. Even though it was the right thing to do, be sure and let him know how much you appreciate his efforts and how much you value the extra time with him! Those words go a long way!
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So D2 had Covid symptoms and tested positive on our ski trip to Utah last month. All of our immediate family is fully vaccinated and had our boosters in November over two weeks before our trip.
H and I did home Covid tests 12/31 (negative) before attending a New Year’s Eve outdoor party with less than 10 friends all vaccinated and boostered.
Tuesday afternoon I started to have a scratchy throat. By Wednesday afternoon I had a headache, congestion and a fever. Wednesday evening I did a home Covid test and was positive. My symptoms started 15 days after D2’s positive test so I’m not sure if I got it from her or somewhere else. I stayed in bed all day yesterday feeling pretty poorly. Woke up this morning still congested, but no headache or fever so I believe I’m past the worst of it. I haven’t had so much as a cold for the past 2 and a half years so this has definitely hit me hard.
I’m 61 with no underlying medical conditions, but certainly didn’t want to get Covid, but here I am with a breakthrough case. H and I had to cancel the ski trip we were going on this weekend, but I am thankful that with the vaccine and booster that I seem to be improving.
I am staying away from H as best as I can and sleeping in the other bedroom so hopefully he will stay healthy. We know so many people right now that have tested positive for Covid (breakthrough infections). Omicron has not been fun, but this is our world right now. H and I both WFH, mask up indoors, but we do still go out and about so we know there are risks.
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did any of the 10 friends also come down with Covid. I would tend to agree that this is not from your D, but from a later incident. Also do you go to stores still?
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None of the 10 people we were with has come down with Covid. I did my grocery shopping last week in the morning (when it’s not too busy) masked up as always in a KN95 mask. 100% mask compliance in the stores where I shop.
As an aside my parents wanted to get together on 1/2 (last Sunday) to do Christmas with our family. We canceled since not only did D2 have Covid, but D1 and her bf had just come back from travel to CT on a plane for the holidays. I’m so glad we did not see my parents over the weekend and delayed it for 2 weeks.
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@showmom858 I tested positive for it too - yesterday. Similar symptoms to you but no fever. Sore throat was first symptom. I have been exposed multiple times at work but never got it. This time I have it but no idea where I got it - we had been visiting family in FL and I think maybe on the drive home somewhere. We’re cautious and are vaxxed boostered and wear masks in stores etc. Seems like it is hard to escape this variety. I know if so many with it. Fortunately most are mild cases.
I only got tested because I had a new employee starting who has a baby at home. I was quite sure I just had a cold but wanted to be sure it was nothing more as I would have been sitting with her training. I guess that is the danger with the mild varient - people assuming it’s just a cold. If I wasn’t being Uber cautious because of new employee having a baby I would probably not have got tested
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@swimcatsmom so glad you got tested before training the new employee. If I had not seen D2’s symptoms when she got Covid last month I might have just thought I only had a cold too. My fever was never very high and didn’t even last 24 hours.
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