<p>So basically my dad and I have a really bad relationship. Right now he just barged in my door telling me that I have to pay for all of my college application fees. He also said that he will not pay for my college tuition.</p>
<p>My family is middle income, and we certainly do have enough money to get me through college. But my dad is exceptionally stingy and does not like to spend money on me at all. He says stuff like, "Why should I waste gas on you?", etc. etc. I have attended numerous national and int'l conferences to pursue my interest in int'l relations and thankfully the organizations have given me scholarships for my airfare/accomodation b/c my dad would never have paid for any of this. I also currently work to pay for airfare to these conferences and now also to pay for all my college application fees.</p>
<p>Do you think this is something that I should let colleges know about in the "additional information" section? Is this an extenuating circumstance that they would want to know about? I know my situation isn't as bad as those of low-income families.. but all the stuff I'm doing to pursue a college education is based on my own funds.</p>
<p>But time to start considering lower cost in state public schools, or if your GPA and SAT scores are high enough you might be able to get some good merit aid from some good private schools.</p>
<p>Hmmm, well since we aren't there we don't know whose fault it is, do we?</p>
<p>I wouldn't put this information in your application. If your family makes a "good" income you will not be eligible for need based aid, even if your dad is a jack ***. Therefore, even need blind schools may reject you if they think you will not be able to get financing. (I don't know that this is true, but if I were you I wouldn't risk it.) I don't see how providing this information to the school will help you in the least.</p>
<p>It sounds like you will not be able to count on your family to help with the finances for college. You will need to figure out what kind of school you will be able to afford on your own. Good Luck!</p>
<p>This is my personal opinion here, I want to say that upfront.</p>
<p>I think you should concentrate your search on colleges known for generous merit aid, which generally means colleges lower-ranked than the best you could get into but that would love to have a student with your qualifications. There are several publics, for example, that will give generous aid to National Merit Finalists. You really need to evaluate each school individually, though, to make sure they are good with aid.</p>
<p>I also think you've been dealt a bad hand in this. My suggestion is to leave this out of the application section; it's not going to get you more aid or any sympathy. For that matter, unfair as it may seem, colleges are not going to bend and give you generous financial aid just because pops won't hand over the cash. If they did that pretty soon every parent in the country would be saying the same thing and letting the school pick up the tab.</p>
<p>And continuing in the "make the best of a bad hand" theme, in the worst case you could still make a go of it without a dime from the folks. If you attend a community college for 2 years and then xfer to a 4-year you get the same degree, and might be able to support yourself for the 1st 2 years without going into any debt.</p>
<p>Definitely mention how you worked for scholarships... so that your family didn't have to pay. Don't say that your dad isn't/wasn't willing to pay, might lead to a rejection if the school is not need-blind.</p>
<p>It is also possible that the child is arrogant, thoughtless, presumptious enough to tick the parent off. I doubt that the ADCOMs will be sympathetic because they are ADULTS. They have been there. If you survey the parents of 16 - 18 yr old kids, it is very likley that most of them complain about how hard it is manage their relationship with the child. I have daily verbal duels with my dad although I am the apple of his eye. The Senior year is shaping up to be worse than the Junior year.</p>
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So basically my dad and I have a really bad relationship. Right now he just barged in my door telling me that I have to pay for all of my college application fees. He also said that he will not pay for my college tuition.
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<p>Maybe he actually is willing and was just ticked when he said it?</p>
<p>No, this is not something to emphasize on college apps. Also, be aware that if, in fact, your father ends up refusing to pay anything, that does not mean you can qualify for financial aid based on your lack of income. In determining need based aid, it is assumed the parents will contribute and need is based on their income, and their refusal to pay is not considered. In other words, you will be facing a situation where you may not be able to pay for college unless you can personally come up with the money or get a merit scholarship. That is harsh, but that is the reality of it.</p>
<p>Last year in my DD school there was a top student got into MIT. However, his parent just had a bitter divorse and his dad who has plenty of money yet refuse to pay the college expense. He had to choose btween MIT and UF(which he had a full ride).
He decided to go to MIT and signed up with ROTC.</p>
<p>I'm in the same situation. On my financial aide applications...my parents said they will pay no more then $2500 a year...and I had to convince them to even write an amount. Like that is freaking realistic.</p>
<p>Don't forget that you need your parents to fill out FAFSA forms to be eligible for need-based financial aid. If your dad won't do this (sometimes stinginess and secretiveness go hand-in-hand) you'll be in a tough spot. Look hard for low cost schools and schools where you would qualify for merit money. Without it, you'll have very few options.</p>
<p>to add on to midwesterner's & drusba's comments;</p>
<p>While your parents are not legally obligated to pay for your college education, most colleges look at it as a moral and social obligation so they look to your parents as the first people the college looks to
in the financing of your education. </p>
<p>Essentially your father saying he will not pay sends the message to let someone elses parent pay for your education (think about it most of the endowment monies do come from other people's parents). Mikemac raises a valid point that if getting FA was as easy as parents saying they are not willing to pay everyone would be lined up with a tale of woe as to why they can't or don't want to pay.</p>
<p>Financial aid is not based on whether or not your parents want to pay or how much they are willing to pay but how much the school feels they can pay according to their income and assets. Yeah I know there can be a major disconnect in this area.</p>
<p>remember the only thing that the FAFSA really does is qualify you for federal aid (pell grants, subsidized/unsubsidized stafford loans , federal college work-study, etc). However this is the bare minimum that needs to be filed at most colleges/universities in the U.S. in order to be eligible for aid.
Some colleges require families to file the FAFSA in order to get merit money.</p>
<p>Many schools that give aid based on demonstrated need (or example MIT since it was raised previously in the thread) will require either the CSS profile or their own institutional financial aid forms. </p>
<p>What your parents state on their financial aid forms will then have to
be verified by submission of their signed tax forms and supporting W-2s.</p>
<p>Inverse writes "Last year in my DD school there was a top student got into MIT. However, his parent just had a bitter divorse and his dad who has plenty of money yet refuse to pay the college expense.</p>
<p>Actually for this kid there MAY be some hope, depending on what state he lives in. Some states will require the non-custodial parent to contribute to the kids college education. </p>
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Whether divorced parents have a legal obligation to pay for their children's education depends on the state in which the divorce occurred. Several states have laws or case law that allow courts to order the non-custodial parent to help pay for college. These states include Alabama, Arizona, Colorado, Connecticut, District of Columbia, Florida, Georgia, Hawaii, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, New Jersey, New York, North Dakota, Oregon, Rhode Island, South Carolina, South Dakota, Utah, Washington and West Virginia. States which prohibit the courts from ordering college support (except for enforcing a previous agreement between the parents) include Alaska, Nebraksa, and New Hampshire. (As of 2/2/2004, New Hampshire judges no longer have the discretion to order college support for adult children.)
<a href="http://www.finaid.org/questions/divorce.phtml%5B/url%5D%5B/quote%5D">http://www.finaid.org/questions/divorce.phtml
<p>To the OP: Scholarships. Get as many of them as possible. Now.</p>
<p>And apply to your state's public...one where you might be able to get some nice scholarship deal.</p>
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I'm in the same situation. On my financial aide applications...my parents said they will pay no more then $2500 a year...and I had to convince them to even write an amount. Like that is freaking realistic.
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<p>that could just be your parents hoping they'll get more financial aid by saying they won't pay much...</p>