<p>Lol, this is so spot in! This is a facebook group I found...</p>
<p>the mystery of the dartmouth student explained . . .</p>
<ul>
<li>you've gotten fries or nuggets at 12:45 am at Food Court</li>
<li>you've streaked the Green, the library, meetings</li>
<li>you've had porchcrawlers at Psi U</li>
<li>you've been to the AD lawn party on Green Key</li>
<li>you've run your class year around the bonfire on
Homecoming</li>
<li>you say blitz instead of email and everyone thinks you
are insane</li>
<li>you read the D for the crossword and get mad when it
isn't in there</li>
<li>you lived in the Choates or the River freshman year</li>
<li>you go to Molly's and Five Olde when you turn 21</li>
<li>you know Jack Stinson</li>
<li>you argue with your non-Dartmouth friends about pong vs. beruit</li>
<li>Sophmore Summer was the best summer you've ever had, even if you were taking classes</li>
<li>Tubestock was the stupidest but most fun water activity you've ever participated in</li>
<li>you've wiped out on the sidewalk walking to class winter term</li>
<li>people ask you if you've graduated or dropped out of
school when you're on your off term</li>
<li>you haven't seen some of your friends in over a year b/c your D plans don't line up</li>
<li>you helped build the snow sculpture for Winter Carnival</li>
<li>you know why the green light in Baker Tower is on</li>
<li>you know what the word rage means and the multiple
context and tones of voice to use it in</li>
<li>you've played shrub, tree, harbor, ship, and line</li>
<li>you've been to champagne at SAE</li>
<li>you have an affinity for Keystone Light</li>
<li>you're panhellinically or inter-fraternally related to
someone</li>
<li>you rushed in a skirt and heels even though it was below freezing</li>
<li>you know what 'tails are and have been to crush,
softball, marriage, invite, super or room to room tails</li>
<li>you've spent at least one finals period at the same table for five days in 1902</li>
<li>you do your grocery shopping at Topside</li>
<li>you've been to exotic erotic</li>
<li>you've been to BG tea and/or had Cutters</li>
<li>you've been sketchy at a Chi Gam dance party</li>
<li>you don't know what the SLI is - only that it's something the bad administrators have made up to get rid of the greek system</li>
<li>you protested the administration's decision to cut the
swim team</li>
<li>and celebrated when they brought it back</li>
<li>you've heard the Baker Bells play the Alma Mater</li>
<li>you've been to Farmway</li>
<li>you want to or have hooked up in the stacks</li>
<li>you got pink eye from the Blitz terminals</li>
<li>you know that Mondays are the new Thursdays</li>
<li>there's nothing business-like about your greek house
meetings</li>
<li>you've done a walk of shame back from Frat Row</li>
<li>you have a class pong table</li>
<li>you throw tennis balls during the Princeton-Dartmouth
hockey game</li>
<li>you know which frat animal house is based on</li>
<li>you've hooked up with someone in every house</li>
<li>you've never paid for beer</li>
<li>you've had a breakfast burrito at the Hop</li>
<li>you call your mailbox your HB</li>
<li>you have a regular sandwich in the Collis sandwich line</li>
<li>and hate the weekend b/c Collis is closed</li>
<li>your formals do not involve formal dresses</li>
<li>you love Franz pong, Boones, and drinking Andre on a
school bus on a way to a formal</li>
<li>you've booted in your 10A, your room, or the bathroom at Coolidge</li>
<li>a member of the opposite sex has pulled your trigger</li>
<li>you know that asking someone to a formal is really just an invitation to hook up post</li>
<li>you've gotten up at 7:30 am for drill</li>
<li>you can Salty Dog Rag</li>
<li>you've hooked up with your trippee/trip leader</li>
<li>Bagel Basement is your go-to hung over food</li>
<li>you've been to a toga party . . . and wore a toga</li>
<li>you've pulled all-nighters in Novak</li>
<li>you've done the Ledyard Challenge</li>
<li>you call everyone by their class year '05,'03,'00</li>
<li>you've hiked Moosilauke</li>
<li>you've fenestrated or defenestrated</li>
<li>you get the GGMM</li>
<li>you've sledded on the golf course</li>
<li>you love hanging out in a basement</li>
<li>you own ridiculous amounts of flair and you wear it</li>
<li>bequests is part of every spring</li>
<li>you've made drunken late night trips to Fort Lous</li>
<li>and rush home around 2 to order EBA's before they close</li>
<li>you were a victim of credit card fraud at Panda House</li>
<li>you're in a secret society - Sphinx, Griffin, Dragon, et al</li>
<li>your mascot is a keg</li>
<li>you've rushed the field during the Homecoming football game</li>
<li>most of your classmates are econ majors</li>
<li>you've been on an FSP or an LSA</li>
<li>you've shaken President Wright's hand</li>
<li>and hooked up on his lawn</li>
<li>you've completed the Dartmouth 'seven'</li>
<li>you've been skating on Occom Pond</li>
<li>you've lived in the senior river apartments</li>
<li>you suffer withdrawal without wireless internet</li>
<li>tanning on the Green in a bathing suit is perfectly
acceptable</li>
<li>you have a dog and you bring it with you to class</li>
<li>you take a maximum of four classes a term and still
complain about the amount of work you have to do</li>
<li>you know three different receipies for batch</li>
<li>you wait in line to get into Sig Nu's 'early 80's' fiesta on
big weekends</li>
<li>you have no idea why it's called Green Key, but you love it anyway</li>
<li>you know that if you do big weekends right you shouldn't want to go out on Saturday night</li>
<li>you know what facetime, obvi, awk, and rando all stand for</li>
<li>you go out on Wednesday nights b/c that's when greek meetings are</li>
<li>you've been shot faried in the library during finals</li>
<li>you've seen moose, bears or other wild creatures on
Tuck mall</li>
<li>you have three world class grad schools a half mile away and you've never been to any of them</li>
<li>you yell your class year and blow during the alma mater</li>
<li>you know people on H Croo and Lodj Croo</li>
<li>you've been off the rope swing</li>
<li>you think shopping at the Co-Op is an upscale experience</li>
<li>you've lived off campus at the ABCDs, the Greys, the
Greens, the Love Shack, the Sugar Shack, the Blue Zoo,
8 School, 9 P, 7.5 Maple or similar</li>
<li>you think a trip to the Walmart in West Leb is shopping</li>
<li>you've made drunken late night runs to Foodstop</li>
<li>you've been overheard at Dartmouth</li>
<li>you've kicked Hanover High kids out of open parties</li>
<li>you have the same clothes as everyone else b/c there's only one Gap and one Northface store in Hanover</li>
<li>you've hooked up with an alum</li>
<li>you've pulled a Good Samaritan</li>
<li>you lived in East Wheelock freshman year b/c your parents made you apply</li>
<li>you know why Zete got derecognized and still hang out there anyway</li>
<li>you recognize this group is a total self call</li>
<li>your mouse pad is a pong paddle</li>
</ul>