Daughter with High Hopes and Dreams

<p>First off, let me thank you all for your answers, questions, helpful information that is contained in this site. Its become invaluable to me.
I need a little advice on how/where to steer my current High School JR daughter. She has big dreams.. She's had them all her life. We live in Seattle, I love it... She does not! Never has and has been counting down the clock until she can move from here. She's got a big personality and wants to see and experience the world!!!</p>

<p>Her choices: LA or NY and then on to London</p>

<p>She has a solid 3.5 (unweighted) GPA with 2 AP classes. She has only taken the PSAT which she only received a 1500+. She has since signed up for a SAT Prep class and is scheduled to take the SAT in June.
She has been on Varisty Softball all 3 years.. and has been on Varisty Basketball for Soph and Jr. year. She has also been very involved, for many years, in a Seattle area Girls Softball program where she Ref's and helps out in the dugouts.</p>

<p>She wants to study Marketing or Law-- hasnt decided which.</p>

<p>Here is where i need advice.... I think her chances of her dream schools are pretty small.. She LOVES NYU, Fordham, UCLA, USC.. and is thinking of University of San Diego. How to you steer her in the right direction without hurting her feelings or stopping her from "reaching for the stars". What are some other schools that she might look at that would fit her criteria (marketing, law, big city, big school, etc). </p>

<p>Any help would be greatly appreciated!!!!!</p>

<p>Oh, and I really am Clueless… I only went to Art School and she is the first to go to college— between my family and her fathers family.
I have no idea how the whole-- applying to college – thing works! :)</p>

<p>thank you!!</p>

<p>Many schools have study abroad programs that range from 5 weeks to full semesters…so don’t worry about the London piece. Have her take the ACTs, she may do better with that test than the SATs.</p>

<p>Have her begin to look at the class profiles that are on most admission sites or if her school uses Naviance, she should use that tool. That will give her an idea of the stats of kids that they accept into the school.</p>

<p>On collegeboard.org, there is a tool to search for schools that match what she wants…she has to get through undergrad before she can consider going to law school so she should focus on that first. And set up an appointment witht he guidance conselor at her school to help you get started…good luck!</p>

<p>No reason why she can’t “reach for the stars” as long as she has few realistic, affordable choices in her basket as well.</p>

<p>Has she been to see these schools or is she just in love with the idea? Have you and your D talked to her guidance counselor to get recommendations? Sounds like she wants a business program in a major urban area. That would be a good starting point for her to investigate. Collegebaord.org has some good basic info so that you can start comparing schools.</p>

<p>Conventional wisdom is that you should pick a few safety schools, a few match schools, and few reach schools based on GPA and SAT/ACT scores. Make sure to include a financial safety school- one that would be affordable and acceptable to the student.</p>

<p>Good luck!</p>

<p>Does your school’s guidance department have the Naviance software; if so your daughter can see how her GPA and SATs stack up against other students from her HS who have applied to specific colleges. The software shows a scattergram of GPAs and SATs of applicants from a high school and if they were accepted or rejected; it can be very helpful determining if applications have a shot or not at a school.</p>

<p>When it comes to ‘law’ it’s something one would study in law school, not undergrad, so that major isn’t a factor in her choice - she could go on to law school from any of her choices and her undergrad doesn’t need to have a law school.</p>

<p>If she’s considering UCLA and USD then she might also want to consider UCSD, UCI, and a number of the privates in the LA/OC area other than just USC. Other posters can clue you into these.</p>

<p>The UCs will likely be quite expensive as an out-of-state (OOS) student and may make their cost higher than many of the privates so keep that in mind.</p>

<p>If she wants to get out of Seattle and experience another area now’s a good time to do it if you can reasonably afford whatever the costs will be. </p>

<p>For London, I recommend she do a study abroad in London if possible for a semester or even a summer session. She should be able to do this from most of the colleges she’d attend (but the extra costs could vary) but she should check on that point. By doing a study abroad there she may ‘get it out of her system’ and be satisfied with that experience or it might spark an even greater interest in her mind to spend more time there. It’s a good way to get that experience although bear in mind it may have some cost implications as well.</p>

<p>You really need to pay attention to the costs and value the choices. You probably won’t know the actual costs until after she gets back financial aid results after applying but make sure you as a family discuss up front what you’re willing to spend and make it something that won’t break your back.</p>

<p>If you cannot comfortably afford full list price at the private or out-of-state public schools, you need to let her know before making the application list of the financial constraints, so that she can make her application list appropriately. At the very least, run the net price calculators on the school web sites to get an idea of whether each school is likely to be affordable.</p>

<p>Be sure that she knows that law school is expensive, so that student loan debt for undergraduate is not a good thing to have hanging around in law school. Many here would suggest agreeing that if she chooses a school less expensive than your price limit that the savings be offered for her law or other professional school.</p>

<p>She also needs to have some safeties on her list which she will be admitted to, there are no questions of affordability, and she will like to attend.</p>

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<p>This is what we told our kids. Once that safety layer is in place, then they could apply to the University of Mars if they wanted to.</p>

<p>What we found useful–using SAT scores as a quick and dirty proxy. We made a spread sheet of the colleges that the kids were interested in. Went to collegeboard.org and copied down the 50% range for SAT scores, both math and verbal (not all schools use the essay part yet). </p>

<p>If kid is under the mid 50% range for either math or verbal (that means that they are in the bottom 25% range), we’d color that square red. If they are above the 50% range (which means they are in the top 25%), we’d color that square green. If she falls within the 50% range, we’d color that square yellow.</p>

<p>Kids catch on pretty quick–two red squares next to a university means that chances of getting in aren’t good. Two green squares looks like a good chance of admission. You don’t have to be the bearer of disappointing news. </p>

<p>College admission is more than SAT scores…but this worked for us to give the kids the lay of the land.</p>

<p>OP, have you told us if money is an issue, or if you can pay for whatever school admits her?</p>

<p>If you can pay for any school, choose a city and then apply to “other” schools in that city. For example, if Chicago was a draw but you think she wouldn’t get into Northwestern or U Chicago, try Loyola or DePaul. You get the idea.</p>

<p>When we started D1’s search, like yours, she wanted to go far from home, to a large U. Didn’t stop us from tours at (or even just wandering through) a variety of local and driveable schools, to give her a chance to understand the rest of her wants. That helped her recognize what “fit” really meant to her, beyond superficials. She had that chance to imagine herself in a variety of scenarios, large and small.</p>

<p>The class profiles don’t give insight into the rest of the picture of what those colleges seek, especially privates. But I love ellen’s idea of color coding- just gives the kid an immediate view. Even if they’re fussing, the image only takes an instant to sink in.</p>

<p>We also did a lot more homework that I can describe rigt now, including reading those big “find a college” books- Fiske and PR- and digging deep into everything on a college’s web site. In the end, she chose the opposite of what she originally wanted. She had discovered a lot about herself. We told her over and over that no matter how much she loved a school, the right finaid was mandatory. And, she told us she knew she could be happy and successful at any of her final targets. That was the day I knew we’d get through this.</p>

<p>So whether or not you’ve visited the LA and NYC schools, I really advocate the local trips for the perspective a kid can acqire. </p>

<p>And, if you need aid, go to finaid.org asap and learn up. Don’t assume anything. The more you understand, the better.</p>

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<p>That is a very expensive list. Your very first step has to be figuring out exactly how much you can afford each year for her college. If you’ve already done that, wonderful. If not, please do it now, before you go even one step further in the process.</p>

<p>There is nothing wrong with having reach schools on the application list but now she needs to find match and safety schools she is equally excited about. That’s not discouraging, it’s simply another life lesson is balancing one’s hopes with reality.</p>

<p>Your Daughter sounds a lot like mine a little over a year ago. She was positive she wanted out of state. No doubts. She is ending up at a school about 40 minutes from home! Once you start visiting and really researching (especially finances - that was a big issue for us) things may change. I agree with the poster about act/sat scores. We also used these as a guide. </p>

<p>Make sure her recommendations are stellar and her essays unique and well written- this can help a lower act score at schools that are holistic… Like smaller liberal arts colleges. Make sure you visit both small and large, urban and rural.</p>

<p>I never in a mIllion years imagined my daughter would end up so close to home but she did!</p>

<p>mspearl, you give me hope! My daughter dreams of college in California, but her grades and financial need might keep her a lot closer to home in Illinois. How did you sell the idea of college close to home to your daughter?</p>

<p>My D also played vasity softball for 3 years and BBall for 2, so that caught my attention… </p>

<p>My D might have been the best at her school, but was not a recruited athlete. If your D IS good enough to play D 1, that could seriously affect the equation for you in a positive way.</p>

<p>If she is interested in STEM, that could also be a great hook for her to attract an admissions office.</p>

<p>Good luck and have fun!</p>

<p>If she remains interested in going to college in NYC, the City University schools are very reasonably priced, even for out-of-city/out-of-state students.
[Tuition</a> & Fees - Financial Aid - CUNY](<a href=“http://www.cuny.edu/admissions/financial-aid/estimating-costs/tuition-fees.html]Tuition”>http://www.cuny.edu/admissions/financial-aid/estimating-costs/tuition-fees.html)
There are dorms available, although living expenses are higher, but not higher than at NYU, Fordham, other private colleges.</p>

<p>Momofcagirl: we visited a few out of state colleges and researched on the Internet for many hours looking for schools that had what she was interested in ( international studies, linguistics) so, that helped a little. She still doesn’t know what she wants to major in but that is another story. </p>

<p>I was very realistic with her and explained how hard it is to get into certain schools and even if you do get in, we may not be able to afford it… Hence the need to apply to safeties / matches that gave good merit scholarships. Once the reality of finances and admission chances started sinking in, there was a change.</p>

<p>I also believe they just start to mature. My cousin is at The College of Wooster that is 20 min from his home but he is so involved he may as well be in a different state. Also, look at the diversity of the school - just because it is close to home, doesn’t mean it will be like high school. Wooster has many out of state and foreign students. My daughter is going to Kenyon and the majority are from out of Ohio. She likes that a lot. And don’t discourage her from applying to a few dream schools where her act may be a little on the lower end. Kenyon was a big surprise for us but they ended up offering the second best aid package of everywhere she was accepted. </p>

<p>She will figure it out. Make sure you start visiting. We visited in state schools first and I think that helped a lot. ;)</p>

<p>Do not try to bring her down to earth other than making sure you have some solid academic and financial safeties on the list as well. </p>

<p>My daughter’s GPA and SAT scores would have received a great many “no chance” responses here if we had asked - and guess what she is headed to USC from the other side of the country and was also accepted at UCLA and many other top schools. </p>

<p>Many, many people here on cc will tell you your daughter cannot be accepted at elite universities. Don’t listen other than making sure her list does not consist of ONLY elite colleges (any school with an acceptance rate under 50% means there is a 50% chance of getting rejected - that is not a “safety”). But DO listen to the advice on financial matters as that is a huge help.</p>

<p>Snowdog: I agree completely with what you just said! Stay away from chance me threads!</p>

<p>Make sure that she knows that she needs to find safeties that she likes.</p>

<p>Every year, there are threads of students who get into only their safeties, which they do not actually like (so they are not truly safeties).</p>

<p>If her preferences are such that there are no schools that she likes which are safe for both admissions and cost, she should prepare for the real possibility of a disappointing April.</p>