<p>I'm currently a sophomore who transferred to Cornell in the Fall of 2006 and did Spring Rush this past January. I'm currently in the process of pledging a fraternity on campus but I am not liking it very much and I am considering de-pledging. I don't feel close to anyone in the house or my pledge class, the house itself is pretty run down and in bad condition, our mixers haven't been great, and I don't feel connected to the people or the house in general which is most important. Most of my friends who are pledging now absolutely LOVE their houses and I do not feel like this whatsoever. The problem with de-pledging however involves a couple of things. I have canceled my on-campus housing for next year and so if I de-pledge I will need to find a place to live off-campus next semester. Secondly, being that I am a sophomore now and will be a junior next year, I will have a difficult time finding a house to accept me during Fall Rush.Fall Rush is specifically for sophomores and upperclassmen, however the only houses that participate are those houses who did not reach their quotas and are very low on the social ladder. I visited some of these houses during Spring Rush and I did not feel that any of them were the right fit for me. The chance of a junior getting a bid is extremely low however it isn't impossible. I honestly don't know what to do. I've put a lot of time, effort, and have gone through a lot for this current house and I don't know what I should do. Any advice would be great? Anyone can PM if they have any personal advice. Thanks.</p>
<p>I can't say I understand how you feel since I didn't rush, but if you're not feeling comfortable with the situation, it's probably best to de-pledge. I know pledging requires a huge amount of time and dedication so I can understand your sense of loss of all that time you spent. My whole impression of the greek scene is that the "brotherhood" is what's most important. So if you're not getting a sense of that, it probably might not be the best choice. And I can relate to the housing. This year has been a disaster...</p>
<p>thanks. does anyone in the greek system have any advice?</p>
<p>I dont think you can rush in the fall since you accepted a bid in the spring. If I'm not mistaken you have to wait one year to rush again if you de-pledge.</p>
<p>Maybe you should let the pledging process run its course and give it a bit more time to get to know the others in the house and the pledge class better. You must have seen some positive aspects to this house to pledge there in the first place, so just don't make a hasty decision to get out. And I personally think it isn't productive to compare your situation to that of your other friends. Would you like your house more if your friends were miserable?</p>
<p>You post about whether you should de-pledge a FRAT, but your previous posts are about what clothes to wear to the SORORITIES during rush. Maybe that's why you say you don't fit in with the brothers (LOL)</p>
<p>hahahahahaha I totally didn't catch that first time around. Yeah, maybe that fall in the gorge affected something......</p>
<p>Have you talked to your Big Brother (or Sister, or whatever) about this?</p>
<p>And not to make you get angry with me, but consider this:</p>
<p>You began your college career at College A, and then decided for some reason that you didn't like College A, so you transferred to Cornell. At Cornell, you wanted to pledge a fraternity, and you did, and now you don't like it, so you're thinking of de-pledging.</p>
<p>Is there a pattern here? Just asking; I don't know. Consider it, though.</p>
<p>My son, who is in a frat, suggested that maybe you would be happier outside the Greek system, living in an apartment with friends, perhaps. If you joined some organizations that correspond to your interests you might meet folks who will really become your friends.</p>
<p>VeryHappy has a point. Maybe you want to explore a little, with the help of a counselor, why it is taking you awhile to connect in college. (I am also kind of a "slow starter," which has worked out both positively and negatively in my life, but mostly positively.) It doesn't seem to me that another exclusive "brotherhood" organization right away is the answer.</p>
<p>Can I butt in on this thread? How important are the fraternities/sororities at Cornell? When we visited, it was somewhat offputting to see so many fraternity houses, since my son is not interested in a school where fraternities run the social life. Plus, he doesn't like the exclusionary nature of Greek life (you are not good enough to get in, etc.)</p>
<p>Thank you for any info,</p>