Hello all!
I am met with the toughest decision of my life. I got into both Stanford and Duke and I cannot decide what to do. I’m so fortunate and so shocked, I just can’t believe it. I have two brothers and each go to Duke or Stanford- I’m torn. Any advice? Differences? I am taking a visit soon to both. Help please!
Wait until after your visits…and then decide.
Until then…let it go.
I agree, if you are going to visit don’t worry. FWIW when Chelsea Clinton was deciding I think between Harvard and Stanford, someone suggested that college was a good time to experience the other coast and an area she had never lived in. I spent a few years in CA because my husband was in grad school there. I’d go back in heartbeat. Loved every minute of it.
Which brother do you like better? 
Hah! They’re trying to sell their schools so hard- it’s pretty hilarious :))
How’s the money situation? Would one of these schools be significantly more expensive than the other because of differences in financial aid packages or transportation costs? Would the difference in cost be meaningful to your family?
You have two equally fine colleges to choose from. You can’t make a bad decision here. And it sounds as though you like both colleges. So even if your parents said that you didn’t have to take money into consideration when making your decision, it might make sense to take a look at that aspect of your choice now.
A long time ago, I also had two equally good choices (not quite as prestigious as yours but very appropriate for me – Cornell vs. Tufts). I liked both schools very much. My parents hadn’t put any financial restrictions on me. But it turned out that it would be substantially more expensive for me to go to Tufts than to go to Cornell. So I chose Cornell. I’ve never regretted it. And if Tufts had been the less expensive school, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have regretted going there, either.
Both schools have almost equal tuition, Duke being slightly higher than Stanford. My parents made sure to let me know I could choose whichever I want, but of course I want to be conscientious of their finances.
I know I won’t regret either decision, since I very much like both. At this point, I think it’ll just be a gut reaction
How often would you like to get home? The opportunity might be better at the closer school.
Depends on what you want to do, and both schools have strengths in terms of resources, but at a paradigm. Make a pro and con list for each school and decide which one has the more pros over cons. Stanford, being located within Silicon Valley, is STEM focused since the school bring in a large portion of endowment, other than research, through liscencing incubated research ideas/products conducted buy professors. However, Stanford is more research focused and its expensive to live in the Valley (if you want to do entrepreneurship, they have a strength there). Duke, also heavily research focused, but has a more liberal arts aspect with their curriculum, which is great since the education is better and you could network with your professor. Its also less expensive to live in NC, (not being located in the Valley). Find what you love, and don’t stop there.
To be honest, I have heard from Duke grads so many negative things about Duke, both from my friends and on CC. I’m glad your brother is enjoying his time there, but in my opinion, Stanford is light years more prestigious than Duke (especially globally), and does not have so many graduates moaning about how awful it was to go there. I think it’s a safer bet all around. But you are you, and I think your gut feeling when you visit will help you decide.
In all honesty if you have brothers at both schools who can give your the “inside story” and since you will be re-visiting the two schools I think you will be able to get all the information you will need to make a decision on your own.
It has to be a gut decision. Not logical. You’ll know in your gut after you visit.
In the meantime, here’s a TED Talk about how to make hard decisions. This talk was transformative for me.
https://www.ted.com/talks/ruth_chang_how_to_make_hard_choices
Great choices! I agree, visit and then you’ll know.