Just found out today my son was rejected by the third of his top 4 choices (CMU comp sci school, which we knew was a longshot, GA Tech and Texas). We are all in shock because we truly thought Tech and Texas were possibilities. He took tough classes, 34 ACT, 3.87 GPA, played football, etc. Don’t get it. Don’t even know what to say to him
Oh my. That’s sad. Does he have a safety?
I’m so sorry . That seems to be the trend with high stats students all over this forum this year. I know that doesn’t change things, but sometimes knowing it’s happening to a lot of people helps take the sting out a little. Is he still waiting to hear from his last school or has he been accepted ?
Is it that he applied to CS? Comp sci is very competitive everywhere these days. Hopefully he had safety schools and several other schools yet to hear from. In your shoes, I would probably say that it wasn’t meant to be and he should focus on maintaining his grades. Things happen for a reason. And maybe (gently) get him thinking about gap years or the NACAC list in May, just in case there is a worst-case scenario. Not to depress him, but to make him realize there are other options out there. Good luck. I feel your pain.
Did he get into the 4th of his top 4 choices, or is he still waiting? In any event,I would let him “grieve” in his own way, and then start talking up the safeties or other schools he has gotten into (or will get into).
Was he instate for Texas?
Was he instate for Texas…or Georgia?
Where else did he apply?
All you can do is:
–Give him a big hug.
–Let him sulk for a day or so and then prod him to move on.
–Tell him that you love him and you are proud of all his accomplishments.
–Remind him that programs/schools that he didn’t get into are all super-competitive.
–Tell him that he should not let an anonymous admissions officer who has never met him determine his self-worth.
–Assure him that where you go to college does not define you, what you learn from and do in college is most important.
–Remind him that he has other great options (hopefully that is the case) and that he will end up just fine.
Hope you all get some good news soon!
Make him his favorite meal for dinner this week-end. This too shall pass.
The way I read your post it was his top 3 schools that didn’t work out. Hopefully there are a couple of schools in the middle of his list that he likes and will come through for him. His stats are good so I think in the end he will be fine.
CS has gotten tougher and tougher. My kid got rejected from MIT, Caltech and Stanford and it stung. The good news is that kids who had the stats for the top schools will almost certainly do fine wherever they do end up. Often better than fine because they may try harder and do better. Good luck to him.
The good news is that he has what it takes to succeed no matter where he goes! This could be a fire in the belly that will serve him well.
It is hard. My son did not get in to GT either, and I honestly thought he had a decent shot. Didn’t get a deferral, nothing. He is doing wonderfully at UF and now I wouldn’t change it for the world!
This process is very stressful. He is a strong student and will be fine, but that doesn’t make it any easier right now. Hopefully he gets good news very soon.
Is he NMF? Then he could still get a great offer from U Alabama.
Also UA Huntsville.
He could still apply to University of Pittsburgh. They have rolling admission.
Months before application season, when my D and I were on the way to a college visit (and I had her trapped in the car!), we listened to Frank Bruni’s audiobook, “Where You Go Is Not Who You’ll Be”.
I seem to remember a story of a high stat kid who was shut out; no acceptances (and the kid made the most of the gap year). And, another very touching story of a letter written by parents to their son, as he awaited news.
I found much in the book that comforted me. I’m not sure what D thought. Perhaps it could help you and/or your son through this difficult time?
A few doors have closed for your son, but other doors will surely open! Life is so strange with it’s twists and turns.
Anyone who has lived long enough can testify that wonderful things often arise from painful events.
Best wishes!
I will mostly echo comments already made.
Let your son have the opportunity to process his disappointment. It’s normal. A hug from you and your unconditional support will help.
Help him to remember that it is not where he goes to school that matters as much as what he does when he is there. There are many, many schools where can have a very good educational experience, make friends, and grow as a person.
Whether or not you are admitted to a school does not determine your worth as a person.
The high stats kid who got shut out and took a gap year was Andison. Lesson for all.
Tell him these schools are reaches for everyone (especially if you’re OOS or outside top 7% for UT, Tech for all applicants.) Reassure him you’re not disappointed, that these schools reject way more students than they admit, that he had a shot and was unlucky.
Bake him his favorite cookies and have a supply on hand with milk 
Focus on his match and safety schools. Pull out cool facts about those.
Hugs to you and your S. Although it wil all work out in the end, it is painful now and it’s hard when your child is hurting. Best of luck to him as he hears from other schols.
@bnovel As everyone else here, I am sorry you and your son are going through this. Any acceptances at any safeties yet or still waiting to hear from the rest? Help him to love the schools he is accepted to and to know this is not a reflection on him.
After my son completed his common app, I broke it all down into numbers: # of freshman seats at top 50 schools and # of HS seniors. Reminded him this does not include all of the international applicants too. The point I wanted him to understand was there are potentially a large number of people applying for these schools and reminded him that he worked very hard, his family is so very proud of all that he accomplished and this is just a crazy process that kids need to endure. Remind him everything happens for a reason and he will land on his feet. His plan is not as he may have expected but it’s just time to outline a new plan and he will be successful where he ends up.
I’m sorry, too. My son only wanted to go to ONE school his whole life. We knew it was going to be tough to get in. In state for Texas A&M, but just outside the top 10%. He had dilly-dallied in high school doing the bare minimum to get A’s/B’s. He did not get in and was devastated. After a reasonable mourning period, he picked himself up and enrolled in a Junior College near the chosen university. He’s getting straight A’s now and has a good shot at transferring in to the school next Fall. I wouldn’t have chosen this path, but in his case it has worked out.
I am not saying your son was like mine, just that sometimes there are hidden silver linings to these events.