<p>I probably shouldn't even be posting about this, but I have nothing to better to do/to lose.</p>
<p>I'm a 3rd year here (not a transfer), the school year has just began, and I'm so unhappy.
I feel the last two years of brutal CS academics, hard work, a limited social life from spending all my time doing said work, and difficulty meeting people at this huge school has led up to me being depressed.</p>
<p>Cal has just been so taxing in so many ways - namely academics, but also I'm having trouble meeting people who I don't find to be 'fake' or superficial - I feel like it's either that or super nerdy and anti-social. This is despite trying many sports clubs and other organizations. I'm naturally a friendly person but can be a little shy at first, and I feel like you have to be super extroverted to meet anyone here.</p>
<p>As a junior, I have a group of friends, but I don't feel like I can't connect with them well - I feel lost, alone, stupid despite my best efforts (just below 3.0 gpa), and I STILL haven't found my niche.</p>
<p>I don't know what to expect from posting this - anyone else feel the same way? Thoughts?
Please, please don't respond with condescending things, it really doesn't help. Thanks!</p>
<p>Your depression is keeping you from “feeling” anything or connecting to anyone.
You are a junior and feeling the pressure of the upper division courses with a mediocre gpa and no wiggle room for a drop in grades.
So buckle down, study, finish strong and yank your gpa up.
You can do it.</p>
<p>Hey you’re not alone. I’m another junior EECS student and have no real friends. I totally understand that these feelings of depression, isolation, pain are natural when you have no real friends to spend time with. But sadly you’d have to learn to live with it. And not a good excuse for bad grades. You don’t need to pull the mind toward some negative conclusion. Probably you don’t work efficiently. Well, I don’t know what more to say. Just hope you get better. and hope to see you tomorrow afternoon in Soda 306 for Pister’s CS150.</p>
<p>My anecdote: after graduating as an EECS major, I realized that almost none of my friends are EECS. My closest friends are actually those I met thru Greek life, whether or not they’re in my fraternity.</p>
<p>To an engineering major, social norms look ‘fake and superficial’. Try to put up with it for a little and pretend to be social. Only after that will most people feel comfortable revealing their true selves. Of course, some people actually are fake: you can just stop hanging out with them if you don’t enjoy them.</p>
<p>Real friends require deep connections to be formed. Those tend to differ vastly between different people. Being superficial at first is a means to probe for the possibility of such connections.</p>