<p>It's been a really long time since I posted here, but I'm having trouble readjusting to life in the States and I feel like a stranger/refugee at my own university.</p>
<p>I'm a junior at Penn and I was studying in Tokyo, Japan since August. I was supposed to be on a year-long program, but it was cut short due to the disaster and I was required to return home to Philadelphia. Here in Philly, I went from having a daily routine (classes, an internship in Tokyo, great friends) to doing absolutely nothing. I'm originally from Northeast Philly, so I spent my first week-and-a-half in America there. That place quickly became too boring, so I decided to come down to Penn and stay here.</p>
<p>I'm doing my best to stay active: auditing Japanese class, looking for a new internship, getting involved with old extracurricular activities. No matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to shake the feeling of disconnection with my school and the community I used to be a part of. I can't (don't want to) go back to Northeast Philly because there is nothing for me there, and I want to stay at Penn and readjust to life here. It just seems like Penn doesn't really expect me to be around much this semester, though. My PennCard was deactivated because my technical status with the university is "leave-of-absence", and I don't have permanent housing down here right now. My PennCard now works on a limited basis, but I still feel a lot of trouble readjusting. I just hate the feeling of sitting around and doing nothing. All I want to do is be at Penn with my friends and my peers. Even if I'm not taking classes, I just want to be around and get used to campus life again. I don't know why that is such an unreasonable request.</p>
<p>There are a lot of things going on recently that would have maybe gotten me excited in the past, like Spring Fling, but I'm having a lot of trouble getting into it. It just doesn't really seem that exciting to me even though I'm trying to get into it. I don't really know what to do and I don't even know why I am posting this here, but I just felt the need to get some stuff off my chest.</p>
<p>Oh, and anyone who reads this and knows me will probably instantly know who this is. I don't really care.</p>
<p>What you’re feeling isn’t surprising, given that you’ve just gone through a rather abrupt and disruptive transition that neither you nor Penn were expecting. If I were you, I’d speak to your foreign study coordinator, or perhaps your major advisor or some other academic advisor, about this. You might also want to see someone at Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) about it:</p>
<p>[CAPS</a> - Home](<a href=“http://www.vpul.upenn.edu/caps/]CAPS”>Wellness at Penn | Wellness at Penn)</p>
<p>You’ll probably find that there are others (probably more than you think) who have similar feelings now, or have had them in the past.</p>
<p>Whatever you do, don’t feel ashamed of your feelings (they’re quite natural!), and do try to speak to someone at Penn who has the experience and wisdom to help you deal with them.</p>
<p>Best of luck!</p>
<p>Thank you for the advice. For what it’s worth, I have been taking advantage of the numerous resources and advisors that the University has offered to me, and that includes CAPS, Career Services, and my major and academic advisors. They’ve all been really helpful and I am very thankful for their support.</p>
<p>However, despite the support I am receiving, I still feel very detached from my peers here. Anyone who knows me knows that I am a very outgoing and sociable person, but suddenly, I feel too awkward to approach old friends or try and meet new people at Penn. I don’t even understand why. I try to contact some people I was friendly left before I left, but everyone seems so busy with their own things to catch up with me (I guess it’s understandable; most of my friends are juniors and have their own lives, jobs, and grades to worry about right now, plus it’s almost the end of the semester). I sit around in my friend’s room in the high rises hoping that someone will contact me or give me an excuse to go out and do something with a group of people. That sounds really sad when I read that sentence over again, but it’s the truth.</p>
<p>You’re definitely going through reverse culture shock, and I agree, CAPS would be useful.</p>
<p>I also know how you feel–I went abroad my senior fall of high school and came back, only to struggle to find my place again (it was a boarding school)…a third of the students were new, and I wasn’t sure how to make it work again. It did take time. It’s worse for you because you came back in the middle of the semester, not at the beginning of one.</p>
<p>At the same time, I’m jealous that you’re there and able to work on fitting back in and auditing Japanese and getting involved, etc. I actually was in Nagano for most of February/March, and I was supposed to be studying at Hitotsubashi starting this month (they actually delayed the start of their semester…classes haven’t even started…I could still technically go, and they just removed the travel warning >_<)
But I had to come back to Florida, where I don’t know anyone under the age of 50 because I never went to school here. It’s really pretty miserable–sure, I can chill and sleep as late as I want, but I haven’t had any real interaction with anyone my age (aside from gchat/skype/facebook which don’t count) since I left Japan almost a month ago. I just started working/internship Tuesday so that I have “something” to do until summer classes in late May, but it’s not exactly fun work. I guess I get to avoid the ‘disconnectedness’ because I’m not at Penn, but at the same time, I almost think it would be welcome over this bum life. I’m not saying what I’m feeling is worse than you, rather, try to remember your situation <em>could</em> be worse and you’re lucky you live where you can go to Penn and at least try to readjust. You may feel like you’re sitting around doing nothing, but I actually <em>have been</em> sitting around doing nothing.</p>
<p>Also, how are you staying at Penn? A friend’s couch or something?
And feel free to message me or something.</p>
<p>Yeah, I know there were a few other Penn students who were in Japan and preparing to study beginning in April. I’m sure you probably know the feeling I’m describing, then. You’re lucky that you’ve found an internship, as I’ve been having no luck so far (I keep trying, though!). </p>
<p>Of course, I’m lucky that I can even be at Penn due to my home in NE Philly being not too far away. I just feel like, if I want to be here and I can be here, I sort of expected Penn to want me to stay here, not making it harder for me to get around. I don’t expect to be given temporary on-campus housing or anything, but it was really kind of an uphill battle just to get my PennCard reactivated (I couldn’t even get into the library to start doing research on my senior thesis, and I couldn’t eat at Houston Hall with my Bursar account). If I want to be here and don’t want to be sitting at home doing nothing, I don’t know why that is such a bad thing. </p>
<p>When I got the call from Penn that I had to return home from Japan, I was really upset and distraught that I had to leave everything behind and return home on 48 hours notice (I was in Kyoto when everything happened and wasn’t allowed to go back to Tokyo to get my things, so all of my stuff is still in Japan). At the time, the people I spoke with were very positive in reassuring me that the University would help me with whatever I needed to do following my return. All I want to do is be at school with my friends, work on my Japanese, work on my thesis, and find a job. Especially my Japanese; I worked really hard to get it to the level it’s at now, and I don’t want to lose my ability. I plan on going back to Japan after I graduate and I’m taking the JLPT in December so that I can get my certification. </p>
<p>Ultimately, seeing my school in Japan operating classes on a normal schedule and seeing my friends from other Universities (in other countries) going back to finish the program is what hurts the most. As you said, the travel warning was lifted recently. Knowing that I could be back and could be finishing the program I started is what is making this extraordinarily tough to take for me, I think. I hate the feeling of sitting around and doing nothing, especially when I know I don’t have to be doing nothing. </p>
<p>It’s too bad that you got sent back to Florida, but likewise, if you want to chat, just send me a message or something. Maybe we can relate to each other a bit.</p>