dilema

<p>I'm a college sophomore with adhd i've posted here a few time before. I am also working on being tested for a possible learning disability. Lately i've had a major dilema. I really like my school but I don't feel like they offer enough support services but since I like it I don't want to transfer. When I was in elementary and middle school I got a lot of help but in high school I didn't get much but extended time. I spent hours(close to 5 or 6 a night) on homework and was often needing to meet with tutors or my teachers for help. I got through although it was very stressful and choose a school that I really liked however I didn't choose it based on disability support. Now I'm at a school I like and have made friends but my school is not a good environment for me academically at all. In high school my parents where my support network since the school was not very helpful. Now I'm too far away to see my parents more than a month at best. I don't have a good cell phone plan so I can't talk to them much either. I tend to get really stressed and would talk to them but now I feel all alone. my school is on the quarter system which is not a good fit for me and has a very bad tutoring department and an ineffective disability services office. I spend 30-50 hours in the library a week. I have no one to help me when I don't understand something or have other academic problems. I can't possibly finish my textbook readings and don't understand any of them anyways. I can't find enough time in the day to do everything i have to and can't keep everything staight. i don't have that much homework it just takes me so long to do it and i have not idea how any of it will get done by the day it's due. I wish I had choosen a school with a better disability services and better support services but I didn't take into account how much harder college would be and how much less support i would have without my family. i just don't know if i should transfer even though i love the school i'm at(that happens to be very academically unsuitable for me)</p>

<p>Wow, I’m so sorry you’re having this experience.</p>

<p>The first suggestion I want to make is that you use your school’s counseling center, requesting a counselor who has experience working with young people with LD’s, and get some emotional support as well as support in sorting through what steps you can take to improve your college experience. </p>

<p>Second, it sounds as if it would help you a lot if you could talk things over with your parents whenever you feel like it. They have been a support system for you in the past, and they will understand what you’re going through now. If it is financially doable, maybe it would be worth it to change your cell phone plan so you’d have a lot more minutes, or free minutes at certain times of the day or days of the week. Or even to get a new phone with a new plan. </p>

<p>Next, a point of clarification. I’m confused about the fact that you’re in the process of being testing for LD’s. It sounds as if you are already receiving some sort of accommodations and using the school’s LD support services, but that the services aren’t helping you meet some of the academic challenges you’re facing. Is the problem that the disability office doesn’t offer additional services, or is it that you aren’t receiving additional services because the new test results aren’t in yet? Is it possible that if the new testing documents that you have an LD the disability office doesn’t know about yet, that more and better services will be available to you?</p>

<p>Have you talked out the issues with someone in a position of authority in the student support office? A licensed psychologist or educational psychologist would be a good person to consult there. My hope is that they will be able to help you pinpoint where the problem lies, what sort of support would be most useful, and, very importantly, tell you if that sort of support is available at your college. </p>

<p>In the short term, it sounds as if time is a huge issue. Will your college allow you to take fewer units per semester as an accommodation (and still consider you a full time student)? This is not an unheard of accommodation for students with certain LD’s, and it might remove a lot of the pressure you’re experiencing right now. In the classes you do take, do you have access to books on tape and Kurzweill if listening to books rather than reading them is helpful for you? Are you OK going to your TA’s on a regular basis to go over material that is confusing to you? If you need tutoring, can you receive it through your disability office? If not, is there another way to set up tutoring through the departments that offer the classes you’re taking?</p>

<p>Given that you like your college a lot, it sounds as if it’s worth trying to see if you can get the support you need there before considering a transfer as a last resort. But to me, the bottom line is, if you need services that aren’t available at your college in order to feel less overwhelmed and for college to be a more enjoyable, fruitful, and fulfilling experience for you, transfer might be an option to consider. And there might very well be colleges out there that would have the things you like about your college in addition to the kind of support that would improve your college experience.</p>

<p>“i love the school i’m at(that happens to be very academically unsuitable for me)”</p>

<p>If the school is academically unsuitable, just exactly what is it that you like so much about the place? At the end of the day, finding a school that is academically suitable is what truly matters. You are there to get an education so that you are prepared to take an adult role in the community and the workforce. </p>

<p>It is OK to take a leave of absence for a quarter or two while you figure out whether this school is going to work for you or whether you need to find a different school. Maybe that is what you should do.</p>

<p>that you for the responses. </p>

<p>anonymom:
I have tried going to councling before but it’s something I really don’t like doing. I have never liked or felt comfortable talking to a counselor so I don’t think that would help much. I would feel bad asking my parents to pay more for my cell phone because my sister and I are supposed to pay for our cell phone our selves and I was having trouble paying it so they are paying half of it now and got me a little better of a plan(free weekends) however, when I need to talk to them the most is the weekdays, not the weekends but I can only talk for about 5 minutes at a time without using too many minutes up. It’s also hard to find a quite place to talk to them since my roommates our usually in my dorm. </p>

<p>I am receiving accomodations already for ADHD. i am not sure if testing and possibly diagnosing a learning disability will get me any more accomodations but it is kinda nice to know exactly what are causing the problems and maybe some different strategies as well. I have been putting off talking to my advisor at disability services because when i was having trouble last year and went it they didn’t help. They sent me to a person who helped me make up a time chart to manage my time better but that isn’t my problem, it’s that their isn’t enough time to do everything I need to do without sacraficing things like sleep and a social life. I know I need to talk to them about my reading problems and see if there’s anything that might help and if I can get tested for a learning disability. As far as credits go, I can take 12 credits and still be full time but I have to take 16 credits a quarter and get a 3.5 to keep my scholarships. I can ask if I can take less and still keep scholarships. I get free tutoring but like I said the tutoring services at my school are terrible. My tutor was incredibally impatient and never gave me time to answer questions and got mad when I didn’t get it right away. He also forgot to come a lot and told me how to do somethings wrong which ended up costing me points on my tests. I had similar experiences with other tutors or could not find a tutor at all. I just know of a lot of schools with really good structured disability services and I wish my school had that. Part of it is just having no emotional support for the stresses having learning differences and being in college puts on you but like I said I have never felt comfortable talking to a psychologist. </p>

<p>happymomof1:
What makes me like the school so much is, the clubs and organizations I’m involved in, my friends(some of which are probably the best friends I’ve had in my whole life), the campus, the atmosphere, the music scene etc. I consider this my home now, and it’s where pretty much everything in my life is now. All my good friends are here, most of the things I really care about are here and I miss it so much when I’m at my actual home. I believe that college is more than just academics(I’m not just talking about partying). Things like getting involved, being part of the community and making new friends are just as important. I’m not doing bad at this school, I have good friends, a high GPA, am on a good track career wise and am pretty involved. however, the stress of having learning differences and practically no support is a huge problem.</p>

<p>Instead of using your cell phone, have you considered using Skype or Windows Live Messenger? These are services which allow you to make free video calls (and voice only as well, I think, though we don’t use it that way) using a computer and webcam. Our son rarely uses his cell phone - sometimes just to let us know he wants to talk outside of our scheduled times.</p>

<p>As for the problems with your school, I’d recommend going to disability services again and explaining exactly what you’re having problems with. It’s a chance to brainstorm solutions, including tutoring and counseling (it may be better with someone new in both cases). You can also get answers regarding courseload, suitability of the school, and transfering if it comes to that. You should know what your options are so you’re more likely to make an informed decision. I hope you can make things work for you, but it’s not the end of the world if you end up going elsewhere. Many students don’t follow the expected linear path and still eventually get what they want. Good luck!</p>