<p>^ There is a difference between showing JUST income and showing all expenses- or at least typical expenses (car payments, house payments, taxes, etc).</p>
<p>*We are very low income and my parents have always showed me where our money goes- to explain to us why vacations, new cars, etc were not possible. </p>
<p>My parents showed me very early on how much everything costs. They showed me our rent, mortgage payment, car payments, etc so I always knew (from as young as I could remember) why I couldn’t do what other kids did- ie nice birthday parties, why we didn’t eat popcorn at the movies, etc.*</p>
<p>I can totally see that. Because with a very low income, there’s no childish second-guessing. It’s clear to see that $XXX comes in and $XXX goes out. And when incomes are lowish, there are often just a few things that the limited money goes towards - rent, utilities, & food…with little leftover for clothes, car expenses, gifts</p>
<p>The problem can be with larger incomes where kids don’t comprehend why so much is set aside for various savings, retirement, emergencies, etc.</p>
<p>^ I get it, I said I just don’t understand it (why someone would hide income) because I’ve never really been in that situation. <em>shrugs</em> Even if I make decent money when I work, I will still show my kids because I am grateful that my parents shared it with me.</p>
<p>^^^</p>
<p>Just be aware that if you’re making good money, your kids won’t have your perspective.</p>
<p>I had to get it thru my H’s head not to announce bonuses that he’s gotten to our kids. As soon as our kids would hear about a bonus, they’d be coming up with 15 ways to spend it!</p>
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<p>Well said. Most children/young adult don’t have enough life experience to have long term thinking. Many don’t understand enough about budgeting and money management.</p>
<p>We started teaching our kids about money at a very young age. We have a budget spreadsheet that we share with them. We talk about how much things cost, play the price is right game at times like when the bill comes at a restaurant. Our kids have savings account starting at middle school and investment accounts starting at high school with their money, pretty small amount.</p>
<p>After all that, I still don’t think they truly comprehend the value of money.</p>
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<p>I know, but I think that would happen either way (whether I showed it to them or not). At least if I showed it to them, there would be less surprises if I told them college was going to be tight or if the vacation isn’t going to happen. As I said, I am glad my parents were transparent with me and I will give my kids the same opportunities that I had.</p>
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<p>Good money usually means college is not tight and vacation can happen. But as adults/parents you might choose not to send your children to that expensive private college or take that fancy vacation. Your kids probably don’t understand that.</p>
<p>My D did not do her FAFSA either. She is busy enough with her school work load and work and I absolutely do not expect her at this point to be filling out a financial form such as the FAFSA. She doesn’t know numbers, but has a firm idea that we do not have what other families have and that her parents are doing everything they can to make college happen without having her go into debt before she even starts <wink>. Every family’s situation is different and I guess you go with what works.</wink></p>
<p>Instead of assuming the kids won’t understand, why don’t you clue them in and then TEACH them why it’s this way or that way? That’s one thing I’ve never, ever understood about parent income nondisclosure. It’s a learning opportunity. Middle and upper income students can same the learn concepts, responsibilities, issues, and allocations for money that lower income kids learn (and if I may say so myself, hopefully it would make them more dollar-aware).</p>
<p>I think there are many valid reasons NOT to “share” this information with your kids. I myself have done so, with my daughter…BUT, I can also see that she has NO concept of the realities of how high or low it actually is. I even prepared a budget, and showed her how it will be affected in the next few years if she selects her cheap/free state Uni, versus her expensive full price dream college. But they’re numbers on a paper. They don’t mean anything to a kid who hasn’t done what some of us have - deciding that $1.50 home made meat loaf WILL be our meal for dinner, lunch, dinner and one more lunch. So, while I’ve explained…I know that, no matter how “smart” she is…she doesn’t really “get” that I’ll be turning down the furnace and not using disposable cups, etc. </p>
<p>Sometimes I think it can help a child to know what their parent(s) make(s) - as it relates to their lifestyle…because then the entry level salary they can expect to garner from their education will make more sense to them. I know kids who think “Man…I’m taking out all the loans I need to for a good education. Because, when I graduate I can expect to earn $40,000 a year right off! I’ll be rollin’ in it, it will be easy to pay off those loans and live like a rock star at the same time”. Then, they see what their parents make and how they live and (hopefully) get a reality check. </p>
<p>That said, I did not TOUCH one step of any application (except one that required my electronic signature). Yet I plan to complete EVERY aspect of FAFSA and CSS Profile. I wouldn’t even trust her to do it AND I’m the one who is paying AND she doesn’t have ANY income. So she won’t see any of it anyway, only the “results” when she gets her aid packages.</p>
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<p>I don’t understand that mentality either. FAFSA will take you less than an hour normally. I’m sure anyone could “squeeze” in that time since it’s very valuable to many students. My sisters has the same mentality- she’s too “busy” to do her FAFSA, and therefore doesn’t get financial aid. It’s MY financial aid and MY education, why should my PARENTS fill it out for me? (And I take over the recommend credits, work a couple of jobs, and do volunteer work- trust me, I’m plenty busy but there is always a little time to do paperwork when it is very, very valuable). </p>
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<p>Couldn’t have said it better myself.</p>
<p>My opinion only (of course), but I wouldn’t expect my DS to fill out the FAFSA any more than I would have him work with our taxes, it’s our income that is being discussed, not his. He has to do his own taxes, of course, so we walked him through that the first time as a great learning experience.
That said, we have no problem discussing our finances with our older son, the earlier they figure out how money works and what income will provide what necessities vs. comforts the better. How many kids do you know who have no clue about proper money management? We see this all the time with DH’s employees buying cars that cost literally half of their yearly wages etc., yet not participating in the company 401K with it’s 100% match.
DSs knowledge of our finances and how we got there have really prompted him to search for the best and most rationally economical college choice, despite the fact that we could spend the $ if we chose to. Those kinds of decisions helped us get to where we are now. I can’t imagine not educating our kids on how it all works.</p>
<p>Because, romaniggypseyes, different families operate differently. In my kids case it might be their education but they are not paying for it. Perhaps you are paying for your education in which case, yes, it is important for you to understand how the financial information is processed and how your parents impact that situation. My kids had braces. They knew they cost $4500, but other than that they have no need to know how we paid for them. My kids know how much their college costs, they are grateful we are paying except for their spending money. They don’t need to know how we’re doing it and we don’t need to do how much they make at their job or how they spend their spending money. We gave them a budget, they found a college, we pay the bills. There is no right or wrong here, really. Nothing subversive. People who don’t sit down and go through the detail are not “keeping their kids” in the dark, there is just no “need to know.” Life is like that. When you are working there might be things you “want” to know, but you may not be in a position to know because there is no “need to know.” College financing goes on the assumption that parents will pay. Many, many kids pay for themselves, but because of the assumption that parents contribute, those kids need to know their parents financial information. The “system” is set up to reflect all scenarios. How you accomplish the output the system needs is entirely up to individual families. This is totally 180 degrees from parents who refuse to fill out the forms or withhold information rendering their kids in limbo, that is not what is being discussed here.</p>
<p>^ I never said it was wrong, I said I just don’t understand it. Where I come from, everyone takes responsibility for their own education and their own forms and everything. I don’t know anyone who had their parents fill out FAFSA or anything- I had never heard of such a thing until I came on here.</p>
<p>“It’s MY financial aid and MY education, why should my PARENTS fill it out for me?”</p>
<p>and if you screw it up, who is paying for your education?</p>
<p>^ If I screw it up, then it’s my fault and I have to pay the consequnces. Just like everything in life. I have filled out/helped fill out four FAFSAs- every one has been verified (except one) and I haven’t screwed up yet.</p>
<p>Oh, and DocT, you make it sound as though my parents have a lower chance of screwing up then I do. They don’t. My father can barely read because of a brain injury and my mom has a hard time doing many simple tasks because of treatments for a disease. Trust me, I am much better off doing it myself even if my parents wanted to help me.</p>
<p>I suppose you fill out the CSS profile also? For some it may be simple but for those whose parents have complicated finances (especially for the CSS profile) where there are trusts, rental income, dividends etc, it isn’t so easy even for the parents to fill out.</p>
<p>I don’t need the Profile. I go to a FAFSA school. </p>
<p>I am not saying that one way is right, wrong, or indifferent. I’m saying I was never raised like that so I don’t understand it. That is just how it is.</p>
<p>^Roman -
I totally give you credit for taking on what you see as something all kids should be doing. While many don’t agree on who’s responsibility it is you obviously have developed some independence and skills that will help you get ahead while others will still be figuring it all out. Good for you :)</p>