<p>D is trying to decide among 4 schools. Although she never found THE SCHOOL, the one she clearly likes best is 300 miles away. The others, where she would also be a resident, are 10,40,65 miles away. The 300 miles is giving her enough heartache that she may decide to pass on her #1. I also have an ulterior motive; the finaid package is about $5-6K better at the 300 mile school than the other places, making it my #1 too! This is a big difference to us financially, but not crippling. We've talked to the other 3 schools, but none will change their package so far. Anyone been through this or have any words of wisdom?.......Thanks</p>
<p>Only 300 miles? My words would be something "Fly, my little sparrow, fly!"
As a growth experience, a little separation would be good...it sounds as if she has separation anxiety as it is.</p>
<p>All of my S's choices were 550-600 miles from home. I was glad that he chose the school that was only a shuttle ride away from an airport that could get him to the airport nearest us in one short flight, and on our preferred airline. :)</p>
<p>Our D's school was 1300 miles away, and it took a shuttle and two longer flights to get there. </p>
<p>Most schools told us that they have ride boards where students who need rides home in for holidays can post a message to share a ride with someone who has a car. </p>
<p>She might not make it home for a three-day weekend, but the fall and spring breaks and the break between semesters shouldn't be a problem for her at all. If it's her first choice otherwise, I'd encourage her to take the plunge.</p>
<p>300 miles is still close enough to visit her for a weekend. It really isn't that far unless it's all back roads.</p>
<p>Yeah, I just don't get it. It's 5 miles to the same interstate on either end, only a 5 hour drive. She could come home every weekend, weather permitting. And she's such a sociable and active kid, I can't imagine she'd want to come home after a couple of months.</p>
<p>Geez. We're deciding between 3,000 miles and 3 miles. I can promise you 100 percent that 300 miles is OK to drive - especially for long weekends. And is there mass transit? Lots of homework can get done on mass transit, making for a very relaxing time at home.</p>
<p>
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I can't imagine she'd want to come home after a couple of months
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I'm guessing that the problem is she can't imagine that she WON"T want to come home often. Since the schools are all close, I'm assuming she's visited? Is there an admitted students function at the 300 mile school? Or could you arrange an overnight for her if she hasn't done that? My S is going to school ca. 2000 miles away and since he's a slow starter socially, I was very intent on his going to an admit overnight. We did and he melded in immediately. He can't wait to go back and I had my worry alleviated. Do you think something like that would help her? She's probably thinking that she needs to be near you/hs friends... and doesn't realize, as you do, that she will <em>partially</em> replace those in short order.</p>
<p>I went to college in the NE while my two best hs friends went to the Midwest.
We stayed in touch, saw each other during vacations, never lived full time in the same city again but are still best friends 40 years later and see each other at least 2 x a year and through e-mails,etc. Of course, we've all picked up other friends (and a couple of husbands) along the way.</p>
<p>Where are her friends/BF going? Is that an issue in this situation? With all respect to Pyewacket, most of us lose touch with high school and move on. Under 100 miles is a little close for me and my family, even my son who says he wants to stay closer to home - I would emphasize the growth opportunities, may just be cold feet.</p>
<p>I think 300 miles away is just about perfect for a college experience. It's far enough the kid won't be running home with laundry or other routine stuff, yet close enough that you can visit for an occasional weekend. Our D is a five hour drive away and we enjoy being able to make the trip for a special performance. (Even if she is performing at a site other than than her campus, it is likely to be weekend-accessible for us.) D has never been home other than for school vacations. I am very glad we don't have to hassle with airline schedules, particularly at Thanksgiving.
I am also glad we are not seeing her laundry! ;-)</p>
<p>Sounds like a perfect distance to me. All four kids in my family went 700+ miles away.</p>
<p>OP: Read the threads about kids getting cold feet. It is normal for kids to feel some hesitation when they realize that they actually are going to go far away (and I'm sure that it seems far away to her!) to school and won't be able to pop back home if they feel uncomfortable. Get a family cell phone plan, and let her know that you are only a phone call away. By October she won't be calling you very often. Let her know that everyone else in her freshman dorm will be in a new environment and will be actively seeking friends - she won't be alone or lonely.</p>
<p>My S is 9300 miles away from home. He couldn't be happier. I don't think I'd miss him less if he were 300 miles away. He's not living down the hall in my house. That's my reality.</p>
<p>I'm with THeDad on this one.</p>
<p>Fly little sparrow, fly.</p>
<p>Another one with TheDad. 300 miles is too close to be consider far, especially if everything else is a great fit.</p>
<p>Son is v close (Maybe 30 miles??-45 min drive) but since he is having the time of his life it really doesn't matter. They have to close the dorms for him to leave his new home. We do attend concerts so we know what he looks like. Expect him sometime soon-dorms are closing again.</p>
<p>The world has changed since I went 250 miles away to college a few decades ago. Now there is e-mail and cell phones, and long distance isn't that expensive. 300 miles and you're still in touch.</p>
<p>My neices all went to schools about 4-6 hour drives from home. They were home plenty. And they always brought friends!!! Being at a place that is clearly second choice and more money, even though closer, will not make D happy. If she is not happy, coming home will be a crutch in a way and then she won't have a chance to get to know the school, and will be more unhappy, and come home more.</p>
<p>Heck, the world has changed since I walked from Ravenna to Brudnisum to catch the galley over to Alexandria and as we passed the island of Kos I realized I'd left a kettle on over the fire back home and loaned out the seneschal to my wife's brother and-- damn...then realized the s.o.b. had never paid me back the 20 sesterces I'd loaned him at the chariot races.</p>
<p>Now <em>then</em> 300 miles was something, let me tell you.</p>
<p>Make that "Brundisium" in the post below. Sheesh.</p>
<p>My H tells our Ds that he used to walk up hill to school barefoot ten miles and uphill home again. In the snow. </p>
<p>They loved it when we went back to Ireland and the two room school house was across the street from his home.</p>