<p>My husband has three kids. I have two. His ex wife had custody of all the children and they all lived with her. He pays/paid support.<br>
We have run into a scenario with his ex wife each year, at the end of their senior year where her and the kids start asking us to fill out the financial aid forms. Her current husband makes good money and has no children, and we don't make nearly as much. Since the kids have lived 3 hours away, never with us, we feel this is not something my husband should sign his name on, and perhaps later get in trouble. His first two are in college, which was not run under his name and income for above stated reasons....His youngest is about to graduate and once again this is a big deal. His children think he is/has cheated them out of grant money because of this. It really hurts his feelings. I had said when the second son graduated, and this "why won't you do it scenario" came up Again, to avoid it with his youngest girl, that she was welcome to live here and go finish school with us, the last year so we could do it legally. She had attended all of elementary school in our district previously, so the adjustment would of been easy for her...This did not happen. She lived with mom and step dad and now that it is two wks to graduation Now it is an issue again. There are tears, and guilt, and the ex is painting us off as being cruel to the children. If I understand right, since none of the children Lived with us, that is why it is wrong to put hubby's info down for their aid....He did pay support.....she collected it....Any advice to us ....are we wrong? And if we are right, any advice how to handle this correctly? Unfortunately we aren't in a postion to pay alot for college, but would be willing to help her with a community college, give her a place to stay etc. Same offer we gave to the other kids.... Now if she did that for a year, could we the next year legally run this under our names to help her? Thanks</p>
<p>I’m not the expert here, but this is my understanding:</p>
<p>For FAFSA schools - his ex and her husband should fill out fafsa, you have nothing to do with it and need to fill out nothing. Your husband can’t be the bad guy, because non-custodial parents are not considered at all for FAFSA.</p>
<p>If the school requires PROFILE - again, his ex and her husband fill out PROFILE. BUT some if not most schools require non-custodial parent information. That would be separate and distinct from their information. I can see your husband being the bad guy if he refuses to cooperate and fill this out.</p>
<p>If they are asking you to lie and say that the kids live with you and your husband so that your information is on FAFSA that would be fraudulent. You are not the bad guys for saying no. If the child lived with you for a year I believe that she could then use your information on FAFSA and PROFILE legally.</p>
<p>There are two different financial aid forms, FAFSA and Profile. FAFSA can only legally be filled out by the parent with whom the child lived most during the year prior to collge. So if our husband’s children did not live with you during the year prior to college, then he should not fill out FAFSA. </p>
<p>If his ex is asking the H to fill out Profile, he should do this. Many schools require that the non-custodial parent fill out the non-custodial version of the Profile form. Your H can fill this out in a way that’s confidential, ie his financial information will not be visible to the ex.</p>
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<p>If she lives with you for a year, then the following year you can fill out FAFSA in your name (the ex doesn’t fill out anything) and possibly receive better financial aid than when the ex has filed.</p>
<p>I am not the expert here but I predict that you will have lots of experts weighing in by the end of weekend. Many of us are in this boat.</p>
<p>FAFSA schools consider income of residential parent and spouse. CSS/Profile REQUIRES all 4 of you. Some schools may not grant financial aid and/or scholarships or merit aid to kids where the proper paperwork is not complete and turned in, so yes, you not signing paperwork likely has kept the kids from getting the aid they need.</p>
<p>It doesn’t matter who makes more money and who makes less. It doesn’t matter if the kids live with you or not. Saying that the youngest could live with you but didn’t sounds like you will cooperate if you get your way, but you won’t if you don’t get your way. Sounds like someone I used to be married to who has little relationship with his kids today. Just because a child went to a school in elementary school does not mean things would be the same in high school; kids change a lot by then and want to be with their current friends by then.</p>
<p>The ex-wife also did not “collect” child support; it is to be used for the children on an ongoing basis. What does the divorce agreement state? Child support is separate from college. If the divorce agreement does not state this, you need to check with the laws of the state.</p>
<p>I am perplexed why when his youngest is leaving high school that you are just researching this now. I can’t comment on what the ex-wife does that is improper, because that could be as well, but facts are facts. You are obligated to fill out the CSS/Profile, and by not doing so, the children have every right to resent you for not doing it. And saying that it hurts their father’s feelings…this is about the kids, not him.</p>
<p>The OP needs to clarify whether her H is being asked to fill out FAFSA or Profile; there’s a big difference. </p>
<p>If the H is being asked by his ex to fill out FAFSA and to pretend he is a custodial parent, this is fraud. </p>
<p>Approximately 30% of FAFSA applications are audited. Finaid counselors look for the situation where the address reported by student and parents don’t match (i.e., if parents are divorced and the address on the student’s tax return does not match the address on the custodial parent’s tax return). Fraud has severe consequences for the student.</p>
<p>Agreed. It is hard to tell from the OP.</p>
<p>it is fasfa form. sorry I did not reply sooner, was waiting for step daughter to call back. And it is fasfa. I told her we would be willing to fill out any profile papers, and to be sure to let her mom know. </p>
<p>Susan I must comment on you. You sound alot like my husband’s ex. You attack me for saying she could Come Back and live where she was born and mainly raised. Not an eyebrow raised about her mom taking the kids, 2 of whom were in high school from their hometown. Yet I would be uprooting for my own selfish needs…hm… You say you have an ex with not so good of a relationship with your kids. Honestly that does not surpise me. Belittling a man who tries and tries grows old really quick. Perhaps I got a little testy with the “collecting” of child support, but you see I have an ex many thousands of dollars in arrears. Sometimes you aren’t so lucky to “collect” My husband who has always paid on time, tried to be there, even after they moved away, has been given nothing but grief. Like in this instance, unless you commit felony fraud for your kid to go to college you are a bad dad. I have a feeling just like in our situation it is not about the kids, but some axe the ex wife never finishes grinding…</p>
<p>Thanks for all your answers!</p>
<p>DO NOT FILL out the Fafsa form if your husband is not the custodial parent. That is FRAUD. And you can tell the ex-wife that.</p>
<p>It is also a federal crime to fill out the FAFSA as a custodial parent if you or your husband are not. And it won’t take too long for a school to figure out that if the kid graduated from high school in State A, but FAFSA’s filled out for a parent living in State B, there might be something funny going on.</p>
<p>That being said, I hope your husband steps up to the plate to help his children through school - he is still their father no matter where they live.</p>
<p>From the FAFSA FAQ page:
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<p><a href=“http://www.fafsa.ed.gov/before010.htm#beforefaq7[/url]”>http://www.fafsa.ed.gov/before010.htm#beforefaq7</a></p>
<p>Perhaps your H can print that page out and send it to his children so that they’ll understand how important it is to fill out the form accurately.</p>
<p>Sorry I misunderstood the post since it did not clearly specify FAFSA or that she was fraudulently expecting you to complete the forms as if the kids lived with you. And, like I said, I do not know the stories of what she did that was improper or proper. I agree that her taking the kids away was wrong, like my husband moving 1200 miles away with no interest in the kids was wrong. But seriously, the third kid is going to college and you are getting clarity on this now? Because of my divorce, I started researching how everything works 2 years before my oldest graduates so I would be very clear on how to send my kids to college given that it will be difficult to get to get cooperation from their father. At any rate, you are at the place, I have learned more from this website than any book I have read.</p>
<p>There is one other category of form you may be asked to fill out-- the school’s own form. Some schools do not use the College Profile but expect non-custodial parents to fill out the financial aid forms. </p>
<p>Really, the thing to do is easy: ask your stepchildren to which colleges they’re applying and call the college financial aid offices anonymously. Just find out what, if anything, they expect non-custodial parents to fill out. Every college is different. </p>
<p>There are a lot of reasonable reasons why the children might choose not to change their home senior year (school, program, extracurricular activities, friends, routines, church, wanting to live with their mom, not wanting to leave their sibs, frequency of contact with mother’s side of the family) and I think it’s a good offer that may come in handy at some time. However, once that offer is turned down, it doesn’t really play into whether or not forms need to be filled out.</p>
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<p>Does anyone else think it’s strange that they’re just getting around to filing FAFSA now? This is extremely late in the game and could be a big reason why the kids are not getting the aid they expected. You’d think that by the time kid #3 comes around, Mom would know better!</p>
<p>Stick to your guns, gailann - you and hubby are saving yourselves and these kids from a heap of trouble that could land on you all if you went along with their wishes. Sadly, it sounds like the mom has no problem lying and cheating and has taught this to his kids.</p>