Do NOT send your kids to Elon

So sorry to hear that BlueRoses. I am happy to hear that Elon has an elaborate mechanism for dealing with it though. Elon has come a long way, and it sounds like the administration is committed to making Elon a great place for everyone. I’m sorry that they haven’t gotten there yet, and that anyone is made to feel uncomfortable. My daughter (soph) has friends in all minority groups and though she usually doesn’t discuss their ethnic backgrounds with me, I know that she truly loves all her friends, and I know that most of them were very upset by the whiteboard incident you mentioned. If I remember right there was a rally at college coffee regarding that and a banner signed by hundreds of students in support of those students. While I don’t have any personal experience with this issue, I can tell you that when asked our daughter about this based on another thread a couple of years ago, she told me of minority friends of hers who love Elon and have not been bothered by any kind of discrimination or racism (including her Asian roommate), and also of minority friends who have felt some of what you mentioned. Maybe it has to do with who you happen to be associated with, or maybe with that student’s personality or background? I don’t know, but thankfully I don’t think it’s bad for everyone. I’m sorry that it was for your daughter.

I’m just curious about where she ended up and if it’s any better. Racism is a problem at every university I’ve been in contact with; in fact I just googled “racism” and a wide range of colleges from ultra liberal LAC’s to the most prestigious schools, to state universities . . . . it seems to be a problem everywhere.

Exactly. Students arrive at Elon - or any other university - at age 18 or 19 - with whatever racist beliefs they grew up with. They learned these beliefs and biases from their parents and extended family, from their friends, schoolmates and neighbors. So I have never understood the mentality of blaming any college - not just Elon - for this type of behavior. The university has an obligation to act swiftly and appropriately when a racist incident is reported - and I believe Elon has demonstrated an excellent track record in this regard. Elon is also constantly hosting all types of diversity programming in an effort to give students exposure to a wide range of opinions and experiences.

So, if you want to complain because there are racist students at Elon, go ahead. But you will encounter people with biases everywhere you go in your life, and I am speaking as a Jewish person who has endured my share of insults - some deliberate - some completely unintentional.

If you find a college or university that has a student body, faculty and staff that is 100% free of sexism, racism, anti-Semitism, etc. - please let us know.

Supruwoman and rockvillemom both make the excellent (and sad) point that there doesn’t exist the university or school where there are no racist people or racist incidents don’t occur. But these incidents occur at some schools more than they do others. A quick Google search of “Elon” + “racism” turns up more than half a dozen entries about racist stuff happening in the last four years. There is the dorm room door incident, and the year before that, some racist posters appeared at various spots on campus. http://www.elonpendulum.com/2013/09/recent-incident-reveals-underlying-ongoing-racial-tensions/ and http://elonfeminists.■■■■■■■■■■/post/66928372819/breaking-news-moseley-tables-racist.

Obviously, even one incident is too many. I’m not sure, however, that we can use a google search to conclude that Elon has more racist incidents than comparable schools. Is it possible that Elon takes these violations so seriously that they are more likely to be reported, rather than swept under the rug? I don’t know the answer, just wondering aloud. I do agree that many/most non-minority students are unaware of how it feels to be a minority student - and this is an area ripe for further exploration.

http://www.elonpendulum.com/2015/02/elons-race-dialogue-lacks-diversity/

This link is very sobering and depressing. I wanted to see how prevalent racist incidents are on our college campuses nationwide, The link in the article provides pages and pages of catologued complaints from pretty much every college you can think of.

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2015/02/24/1366475/-Shocking-catalogue-of-racist-incidents-on-college-campuses-across-the-United-States-from-2011-2015#

This is the actual link to the Journal of Blacks in Higher Education.

http://www.jbhe.com/incidents/

Thank you, rockvillemom.

Elon is a very well marketed school and appeals to those looking for superficial qualities. My son tells me about all the Elon buzz in his senior class. Parents nowadays don’t manage the college selection process very well, im my opinion. I have been to Elon and it is impressive in terms of facilities but academically there are better choices for the classic B student underperformer. I can’t believe parents would choose Elon over St. Lawrence, Muhlenberg, Gettysburg, Providence College and a few others that have admission standards for this type of student but develop them into something much more.

As someone who worked in the college counseling field for several years and guided my own two sons through their college search processes, all I can say is to each his own. Colleges that appeal to one student/family fall flat for another. And that is perfectly fine, as we all have dozens if not hundreds of colleges to choose from, and we have different priorities and different interpretations of what we see. I do prefer to maintin a more mature outlook which would include refraining from bashing someone else’s decision based on a mere visit, but again, to each his own.

rockvillemom, what appeals to me is a university that works hard to cultivate an environment where tolerance is prized and where, if and when racist incidents happen, handle them the way the President of Oklahoma University handled the recent disgusting incident with the SAE frat boys. He was quick and decisive and showed that such things will not be tolerated and students turned out in droves to say that they agreed.

Completely agree.

What was discouraging to my daughter when she was at Elon was the attitude of a lot of the students of color who she encountered in the diversity mentoring program. (Let me back up: at Elon, incoming minority students are automatically enrolled in something called the SMART Mentoring program, which connects them to other minority students, etc for support. A good idea in theory, though the little sign they put on your dorm room door welcoming you makes it easy, as my daughter said, to walk through the dorm and identify immediately where people of color live, LOL. SMART Mentoring kids are also automatically assigned academic support tutors/helpers, which I think is kind of racist, as it means the school automatically assumes that minorities need academic support. My daughter was an A student and on the dean’s list both semesters, but had to jump through hoops to convince the program folks she did not need the academic advising/tutoring.) OK, back to what some of the students of color told her. They basically said “Hey, this is just what life is like for us here, so you have to suck it up and cope. It is what it is.” Several told her that they really felt out of place and alienated and unwelcome for their first year or so, but finally found friends and a certain level of comfort second or third year. Now, I fully recognize that those students don’t speak for every student of color at Elon. In fact, several of the kids who said this told my daughter that their discomfort initially is why they decided to become SMART Mentors – to help other POC coming in not feel as bad. Still, not a ringing endorsement of the climate at the school. That said, to be fair, we know a half dozen kids who went to Elon and graduated from there and LOVED it. Only one of these students is not white, and all were in the theater/musical theater/dance department, which has a totally different vibe.

So interesting - I had not heard of that program and my first impression is to recoil at the signs on the doors and the automatic academic support. I would be offended by both. Well intended, no doubt, but very uncomfortable to me. Did you provide any feedback on this after your daughter transferred out?

I work with URM to help them with the college process. It turns out that the kids I worked with were Hispanic, not African American. However, those kids were very happy to be part of programs such as the SMART program that you are talking about. So to be honest it seems to be a no win situation. If these programs weren’t available there would be someone complaining about that too. I know lots of kids who would kill to have extra tutoring available to them, be them Caucasian or African American . I’m sorry but the bottom line is that you just can’t make everyone happy. If you don’t want the services then don’t use them. This world is not perfect, and no one is going to make the world stop spinning to make you happy.

It seems to me that a program to help minority students connect with others would be helpful, but to automatically enroll them for tutoring is offensive. I wonder why the tutoring part of the program isn’t just offered as optional.

Again, the programs that I have seen for the URM students that I worked with also do the same thing. I understand the reason for the the automatic enrollment is because generally speaking these students don’t know that these types of programs exist and/or are a bit timid in accepting the help. Consequently, the programs make it mandatory that you attend the tutoring. Are they making assumptions? Yes. As a whole these programs work extremely well for URM students. Does it mean that every URM is from a poor underprivileged background? No. But they can’t really ask those questions, so they automatically give you the opportunity. Again, you can’t make everyone happy. If you don’t it then don’t go. Have the parents call the school and ask to be removed from the program.

My daughter is Asian, and so would not have been considered a traditional URM on another campus, such as Stanford or Hopkins, where there are many Asian students. At Elon, though, she was. I actually don’t object at all to giving minority students the opportunity to interact with other minority students on campus and think that such groups can be a valuable resource. But to partner mandatory academic faculty mentors (who are not themselves minorities necessarily) seems strange to me, especially if the student in question came to Elon with an A average. My real objection was to the fact that if you are a member of a minority group and enrolled in the SMART Mentoring program, the program slaps a little sign on your dorm room door. (I think I said this above. My daughter laughed a bit and said “Well, I can see from those signs that I am the only person of color on this floor! They point you straight to where the non white people are!”) Overall, that alone was not a big deal, and was definitely well intended. One question that I had for the university after my daughter had to report an incident and was referred to support services is “Why is it the minority person who always has to seek support and counseling about these incidents? Why don’t the white students who are the ones using racial slurs, etc. the ones who need to change?” One Elon parent told me that she thinks it is great that there are not more minority students, because it means that the white students and the minority students have to interact. My response (and I am a white person, by the way!) is “My minority child is not there to give your white child an experience of diversity.” This same individual commented that he/she noticed that black kids always sit together in the various dining halls. I wonder if she noticed that white kids gather together, too. Because they do.

Did they tell you ahead of time that you would be part of the smart program? Also did you realize that Elon is not a very diverse school? Or was that something of a surprise to you? My S attends Stanford, which is very diverse and the polar opposite of Elon. Its something that we had to think about for both of our kids. But once we decided that that was the school for them then they had to take it for all it was worth. Nothing is perfect. You just need to move passed it.

Blueroses- When your D reported the incident, you mention that they asked her to seek counseling not the kid who made the racist comment. Again, I think it comes down to the fact that your D made the complaint and they are trying to make sure she is okay. I would imagine that if she pinpointed the individual who made the racist comment that they would reprimand that individual. Or is that not the case? At the end of the day, I always tell my children that they can’t change others, they can only change themselves. In the perfect world it would be great if the wrongdoer wasn’t only punished but their deviant behavior corrected. But thats not reality.

For what its worth, in many universities Athletes are expected to report to a tutoring room daily where they must do their homework in the proximity of a tutor. Again, its not to say that these kids are unintelligent or incapable. Instead its to insure their success.

Dundareedoll, I don’t see that athletes being required to go to tutoring room daily to do their homework has anything at all in common with students who are racial minorities being automatically enrolled in an academic support program, no matter what those students’ scores and grades are. What does one thing have to do at all with the other? Athletes have particular demands on their time (practices, working out, games, etc.) that are extremely taxing in some cases, and from what I understand (friends who have kids who are college athletes), the homework time, etc is built in to ensure they make time to do their work. My daughter wasn’t part of college athletics and manages her time very well, so having to have an academic advisor (apart from her regular academic advisor, who was wonderful, by the way) was just something that wasted her time. She was on the dean’s list both semesters and didn’t need a special supervisor to make sure she was successful. I see nothing wrong with making resources available to students, especially freshmen. But it does feel a little racist to decide that by skin color, don’t you think? It’s like saying to minorities: we know you got into this school with lower grades and test scores than the rest of the kids did, but don’t worry, we will make sure you are successful. It would make a hell of a lot more sense to offer the academic support to all new students, and to limit the support offered to minority students to emotional and social support, which they can avail themselves if they want it. But to say “Oh, you’re not white so you are automatically part of this academic support program” is racist, I think. And no, we had NO idea about this program until the day she arrived on campus and that sign was on her door, alongside the regular sign from her RA welcoming her to the dorm.