<p>Just wondering if parents help their S/D's move in to dorms for year 2? We live in So Cal and D is finishing freshman year in Boston. I flew across country, rented a big car, did the Bed, Bath and Beyond/Target routine, lots of tears, etc for freshman move in. D will be leaving most of her stuff in a storage unit with her 3 future roommates and will probably not need my help. While I don't necessarily want to incur the airfare, I am wondering if at the end of summer, I will feel the emotional need to accompany D back to Boston. I am sure she would be absolutely fine on her own. She is amazingly independent....too independent for this mom. Maybe a family trip to New England at the end of summer and dropping her off at school???? Any thoughts you experienced parents?</p>
<p>mine did</p>
<p>definitely a big help :)</p>
<p>No. (10 chars)</p>
<p>For my son, it would certainly not have been necessary for emotional reasons, but as a practical matter, I needed to accompany him. However, this was not a cross-country trip. He attends a university within easy driving distance of home -- so easy, in fact, that we made two round trips from home to campus for move-in that year; the second trip was so that we could bring an office chair and his bicycle, which did not fit in the car the first time.</p>
<p>I helped DS2 move into his apartment his sophomore year. What a lot of work. There was never any question of did he want me there. He did want me there, to help lift and tote, and buy stuff at Ikea. But I thought, well, this is only once then he is set until graduation.</p>
<p>Much to my annoyance, in January he informed us that his original set of apartment mates had decided to split up and he and 2 others were going to a different apartment. This time I wished him well and told him to be sure and send me pictures of his new place.</p>
<p>No, not really. </p>
<p>My husband did drive with our daughter up to Columbia after she had packed up the car. He went to work for the day at his firm's office in NYC. She unloaded the car and met him for a quick bite to eat before he drove the car back to PA at the end of the day.</p>
<p>I needed two cars to get all my stuff to school last fall(freshman year). It will take two cars to get everything home in 2 weeks, and it will probably take two cars to get everything back here in August. Back in the fall, the only thing my parents really did was transport everything and help me carry it to the room. There was no big emotional goodbye (we were more than ready to have space from each other), and I did all the actual unpacking alone.</p>
<p>I helped S drive his car school the past fall. Only helped unload a couple of bags, most his stuff was in storage at the dorm. This year he is moving out of his dorm and into an apartment. His Mom will be flying in to help organize the effort and help pack since it has to be done during finals week with no extra time to move out. He is very happy with this prospect.</p>
<p>we did not do move in, but will do move out in about 2+ weeks.</p>
<p>I was planning to help D move in, but then we sold our house and moved that month and there was no way. D went to school (15 hours away) with a group of friends accompanying her for a little road trip. It worked well, but I was sad to miss the time as D & I have fun doing that kind of stuff.</p>
<p>Due to my son's fixation with foreign exchange, in both sophomore and junior years, it seems I had far more than a rational share of 12 hour drives to and from his school with a loaded van. In January, twice. Not cheap or relaxing. However, the time was priceless, as a way to participate in his college life, and as a way to catch up, freed from the distractions of friends and siblings at home. </p>
<p>Perhaps some people have more success or the resources to plan vacations together, but for us, the drive to school was it for a few years. As a senior, he finally left some things with friends, and carry on baggage, as well as a UPS shipment was sufficient. </p>
<p>Some people in my town with kids gone a similar distance had kids at LAC, which apparently tend to have storage. But at a state school, we didn't have that easily available. </p>
<p>In reference to the theme of your post tho, what is a usual level of involvment at a school in a far off state?</p>
<p>We only did it because S wasn't able to store stuff at his school without spending a fortune. (New Orleans a year ago didn't have many storage options available, or very expensive.) And he didn't have a car with him.
So we moved him out last summer and brought him back in the early fall.
He definitely liked having the help, but would be more than fine if we weren't around.</p>
<p>This semester, he brought a car to campus, and several storage facilities re-opened this past year. So he'll be storing bigger stuff and bringing the rest home in his car, a 7 hour trip. Rather than accompany him in the fall, maybe H & I will take a trip just to visit later in the semester. What a concept...actually going down there without having to DO anything.....</p>
<p>However, I can relate to the apartment thing. D moved into one at the beginning of sophomore year. It WAS alot of work and quite expensive to get "set up". Now we're hearing she may move into a condo a friend's parents are buying that will be fully furnished. And I'm wondering, what about ALL THAT STUFF!!!</p>
<p>We didn't with our first child and won't with our second. Parents weekend is at the end of September so I can just bring down some of the bulikier stuff then. My daughter's college has storage areas for all students (yes, I know we're lucky) so she just had to bring her clothes.</p>
<p>No for me: 2 kids, 3 colleges, 4 move-ins & 2 move-outs to date -- I helped my son move in the first time, everything else since then has been handled by kids on their own. My d. is being very efficient about the whole thing - she returns home this coming Saturday, & had most of her stuff either shipped out or in storage last week - she says she'll be flying home with one large & one small suitcase. </p>
<p>I did go to visit my d at her college this spring. I remember the move-in with my son way back when as being very tense ... whereas the visit with the well-settled daughter was quite relaxed and gave me the chance to get a glimpse of her <em>real</em> college life, meet some of her friends, sit in on a class, etc.</p>
<p>we did the 2nd year,but discovered we really didnt need to.The third year D moved to an apt and did need our help.4th year she moved from an apt to a group house.We said good luck,we'll see you out there at graduation and to help you move out!!!</p>
<p>Must be nice. Back in the 70s, I went to school 600 miles from home. My parents drove me out freshman year, and after that I was on my own. I must have shipped stuff back & forth but I really don't remember! </p>
<p>I do remember when I spent one summer at school, getting a cab to carry my stuff across campus to my summer digs. The cabbie was not pleased with this time-consuming jaunt. :eek:</p>
<p>I've always helped with move-in, and enjoy it. It actually passes for "vacation" in my house. My middle d will begin her junior year in October, and mom, dad, and youngest sister plan to come along (even though middle d has her own car and could certainly manage alone - she's getting herself home this semester without help). She wants her sister to consider applying there, so we'll do an informal tour between lugging bins to the elevator. We'll also try to see another college on the way down and a third on the way back.</p>
<p>Blucroo: Do whatever you & D & the rest of the family want. Doesn't matter what others choose. I happen to LOVE Cape Cod & Boston. I'd be quite happy to plan a pre-drop-off vacation if the family voted on it. Spending family time when it's running out doesn't mean you or your D are needy or lacking independence. Nothing wrong with enjoying each other.</p>
<p>Freshman year- two years ago- moved D in during August- and out in Spring
This year Sophomore - D drove , moved herself in, and is due to move herself out in four days. </p>
<p>Of course, this fall, we moved Freshman S in - midwest school- ND, and we are in NJ.
He is due to move out in five days- driving East with a couple other boys.
Am very concerned about that, we wanted him to fly, but he chose to drive with others.</p>
<p>H and I moved our D into Barnard (NYC) her first and second year. At the end of her first year, she was very stressed out with finals and trying to decide what to ship home and what to take with her for a six week job at a theater in PA. Calmom, my d is not quite as cavalier as yours about all of this and she does have a lot of STUFF!</p>
<p>I am going to go up there next week to assist her and her suitemates in sorting and packing their kitchen, bath and such for storage. THEN d goes back up there to get just what she needs for a 10 week internship. We will be packing the rented storage "closet" strategically so she can get just what she needs for the summer (not knowing roommates at this point, though, so we are not sure what she will need for her kitchen).</p>
<p>Then, her things go back into storage for most of August and back out again at the end of the month. I imagine her dad and I will go up in August to get her "settled" for another year. We just enjoy it and she does as well.</p>