<p>Seeing as how personal statements are nothing like essays you've written in school, I'm wondering if you really NEED to state your thesis in the introductory paragraph. Because since the college admissions people will only spend like 1 or 2 minutes reading your essays, I get the feeling that if they see the thesis in the beginning then they won't really pay attention to the rest of the essay. Instead they'll just check to see that the details and experiences support your thesis. I've been thinking, can you like impose a question in the introduction that relates to your topic and then answer that question in your conclusion after having provided all the details in your body? Or should you just write it like a normal essay and state your thesis and support it with the details in your body?</p>