This situation really stinks for your daughter but I have to agree that you need to be looking at all 4 years and kids usually bloom where they are planted. Not having the stress of figuring every year out could be a huge benefit in your daughters mental health. Also - can you get a job and help pay or is there a reason you have no income?
If he has not paid more child support, he is not going to want to file and pay back taxes for four years.
If some income is on 1099 then he might owe social security taxes as well.
I don’t think UR is going to be able to award aid if all they have are W2, 1099 forms, and no tax return.
Did they say that?
If he starts filing tax return for 2015 then the IRS might wonder about the previous years, especially if they received copies of W2s and 1099s, which they are supposed to get from the issuer.
It would have been in his best interest to file returns and offset his gross income with business related expenses, so only his net profit would be taxed. But he didn’t do that because he probably didn’t set money aside to pay quarterly estimated taxes or would owe taxes if he didn’t have enough withheld from W2 income.
When the IRS does catch up with him, they are going to assess his back taxes and penalties and interest on the gross income he received, since that’s all they have. It’s going to be on him to provide expense receipts, but it’s going to cost him a lot more than if he simply had filed and paid balance due every year.
If he can’t afford child support, he can’t be counted to pay anything for college.
But if the school requires his income and tax return to award need based aid, then you are going to have problems if he won’t/can’t cooperate.
Thanks everyone, too many people to tag so I will try and cover it all here. First, yes, UR FA rep told me on the phone that she doesn’t need him to file taxes, they can award aid based on his W2’s and 1099’s.
He lost everything & had no W2’s or 1099s from 2012 onward EXCEPT the 2016 he just got. I asked the FA rep if he could use those instead as he has them and she said maybe, she is looking into it. He made less in 2016 so that is on our side. I know this guy, he is a mess and honestly doesn’t remember what he made in the past. The life of a professional chef is a very stressful one. They usually have about 10 W2’s and 1099’s as they do side catering jobs as well as many small in between jobs, consulting jobs & there is a high turnover rate. He gets home at 2:00 am every night & has to be back at work at noon, kitchens are in basements w/ no cell or internet & it’s a horrible life, impossible to get anything done. His girlfriend is a real mother hen type & does everything for him so he can’t do anything on his own. They broke up & he can’t find or do anything. I bet he will have a new girlfriend soon as he needs to be taken care of.
I do not think he has any $ at the moment, his mother had to give $ all the time. She is sick of his crap but helps him anyway. Threatening him w/ court I have tried - he says go ahead, you can’t get blood from a stone. He wont’ work out any deal w/ me as he says he has no $ and will sit in jail as then he’d at least get to rest. He is very depressed. I also cannot afford to actually take him to court, if you read past posts you will see why, don’t want to bore people bu repeating myself too much. Divorce decree only says he pays half of all education expenses. He never has & never will. He often gets paid under the table & when I have taken him to court in the past they don’t award more child support as he says he is unemployed while getting paid under the table.
Not sure if this will work but he is willing to talk about giving up all parental rights, therefore hopefully only my income will be looked at in coming years, meaning we will get more aid. An attny friend is looking into that for me, as he still may have his finances looked at. It wont’ help the situation now.
I do work, just don’t make much, made even less in 2015. Expanding my business now & am on track to do much better this year.
My parents have a college savings plan, not sure it’s a 529 plan or not. I thas $30K in it which we an use whenever we need. That is $7250/yr for 4 yrs or we can use more now & less later if I have more $. His father is deceased so just his mother is the only other grandparent. She will gift us $14K/yr as that is the gift amount for this year. She owns malls in southern CA and has been wealthy since I have known her. She is very close w/ DD and I know will pay that. I am hoping if she thinks her son screws this up she will offer more but she is very self made, a real hard ass type and isn’t one to give handouts. She is very German, lol, I can say that as I am part German myself.
He will NOT file taxes, will not happen. He will wait until the IRS tracks him down in a few year and deal w/ the consequences them. UR said they only need his to do this once & will award aid for the 4 yr based on his income provided now so I won’t have to rely on him to do this forms every year, unless his greatly changes.
I think I covered it all - I appreciate everyones advice and I promise, we have the 2 back ups and I won’t loose those unless I get aid from UR, we don’t even need full aid, just 50% aid. I am hoping as he has this other child UR will see he has her as a dependant as well and it will help us get more aid for DD, but not sure how that works.
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Do the 2 backup schools absolutely have EVERYTHING they need to give you financial aid? If you don’t know that for an absolute fact, check NOW. You may well need one of them so right now make sure they are rock solid financially. Don’t want her to end up with no financial options
Yes, we can cover those schools, we visit Roanaoke for her scholarship competition this monday, she should get more $ then as she is a talented writer (part of the competition) and is great student. She already got $19, 250 in merit aid from them & the we got $12k FASFA from other private schools she isn’t interested in so we hope she gets that from Roanoke as well. College of Charleston is in state & we can cover than fine. Those are the 2 back ups. We have till 3/1 to let UR know but the FA rep says they should extend that for us. C of C & Roanoke have deadlines of 5/1 so we have time. Thank you for your concern!! We have a safe $22K per yr from grandparents + FASFA. We don’t even need all that at C of C.
Even if he has ‘lost’ all his W2 forms, you can get your income history from your social security account. easy enough to do online too.
Having the 2nd child helps a bit, but really only helps a lot, if the child is in college.
Your D sounds like a wonderful girl and of course you want the best for her. You have gotten a lot of great advice here, so I am not going to repeat it, but I will add, that perhaps you are not seeing the forest through the trees. UR is a wonderful school, but it’s not the magic bullet that is going to guarantee your D a wonderful life. I fear that in your quest you may have romanticized this school too much. Didn’t you say you haven’t even visited it yet? That is unusual when applying for binding ED admission. And I know in other posts you said your D didn’t want sporty, preppy, or Greek and UR checks all those three boxes pretty solidly. Full disclosure, I visited UR with my own D and loved it, but it was very different from W&M which I know was your first choice. It sounds like you think UR is so above and beyond your affordable options and I am just advising to take a step back and really look at it, for what it is and what if offers regardless of the ranking and the prestige you think it conveys. It’s not like you would be giving up Princeton for a community college, but it almost seems as that is how you view your choices. I am not familiar with Roanoke, but do know that College of Charleston is an excellent place. I know some kids there and some who graduated with great experiences. In fact, I have a family member there now, who chose it in part because of the finances and is getting an excellent experience.
@wisteria100 We are visiting UR this w/e on the way to the Roanoke competition. She is aware, as I have researched, that there is a preppy vibe and certainly a Greek presence, but she can’t have everything and the schools offers unique classes for her major and great study abroad and the ability to combine the majors she is interested in. Low student/faculty ratio and all classes taught by professors. I don’t think we’re romanticising it as we did W&M, this was a very logical decision as well - esp it being private so no VA in state rule and better aid. We do know it’s a very different feel from W&M but logically it was a great choice. She has been accepted at C of C & Roanoke and we can afford those and esp C of C is a great school. But I see nothing wrong with hoping UR will work out, we have a little time.
We never visited it when we went to W&M all those times because, to be honest, I never knew it existed! Not until Thanksgiving when a friends mom showed he pictures of it that her niece sent her - she is there and loves it. I came home & told D to look it up in case W&M didn’t work and we just haven’t been able to visit as it was only Thanksgiving. The more we researched the better it sounded. I was a little surprised they admitted her as she had not been but she is being flexible and was willing to go sight unseen as it was one of the better schools she applied to and figured, if she got in, it would be smart to go. It has all she wanted for her major and we can see it’s beautiful from the pix and videos.
@cloudysmom ‘offers unique classes for her major and great study abroad and the ability to combine the majors she is interested in. Low student/faculty ratio and all classes taught by professors’
this could describe the majority of liberal arts schools in the U.S.
If he was issued w2 forms, the IRS already knows about him.
His having another kiddo won’t matter. She is not a member of your household or a student in college.
@wisteria100 Actually she is studying the French Revolution, Napoleonic studies and those classes are limited, W&M had none nor did they have study abroad in Paris. UR has very good French programs
If you’ve been in regular contact with your ex, I don’t think colleges will care what he says. Why would they let him off the hook just because he doesn’t want to pay?
I think this plan is shortsighted. Does your daughter stand to inherit from her wealthy grandmother? If she’s legally no longer the daughter of your ex, she might have to be specifically named in a will to inherit. Not all grandparents would look kindly on giving up the family name for a few thousand bucks, so I wouldn’t count on Grandma’s $14k/year if you follow through with that plan.
@thumper1 I’m sure they do but since 2012 they haven’t sent him any info or letters, despite getting unemployment. Makes no sense. He just sent me his tax forms for 2016, UR says they might accept them instead of 2015 as he has those as they were just sent to him. Fingers crossed.
I feel bad for his other D as well. She would probably be wise to look at colleges that require FAFSA only, when the time comes.
@austinmshauri Actually his mom encouraged me to do so as he is a mess. D will be 18 soon so easier to do. This is not a plan, just a vague idea we are researching. Probably won’t happen. My ex has actually agreed if it means the schools won’t need his financial info. & we’ll get more aid. My D wants nothing to really do with him and he hasn’t seen her in 5 yrs so he isn’t around anyway. My D is already in her will by name. My ex’s mother has cut him from her will. It is all to her other son and her grandchildren. My D would keep her name. If he terminates his parental rights legally in court, I am not sure but it may mean that as I will have sole custody, only my finances will be considered.
Could you please once again explain the gift limits?
To the op, I would want four years of college money placed in a 529 in your daughters name now…from the wealthy grandparents
Your daughter’s grandma sounds like a nice lady. I’m sorry her son is so difficult.
There are no gift limits for money which goes directly to the college. Grandma can give as much as she likes to pay tuition AND 14k per year to both granddaughter and daughter (and indeed- to anyone else) with no need to file a gift return.
And to clarify- since this seems to come up a lot on CC- filling out a gift tax return takes less than 10 minutes. You do not need an accountant to do it. And for the vast majority of people in the US- filling out a gift tax return IF you choose to give someone more than 14K in a single year, will NOT result in any tax liability whatsoever when you die.
This generous grandma can pay the entire bill to the university without any impact on her estate plan (other than the assets being gone- obviously). But there is no limit for money paid directly to the university on the granddaughter’s behalf.
Thanks @blossom, I will pass that along, I didn’t know either, maybe his mom will contribute more if she thinks he is screwing this up for D. @thumper1 The wealthy grandma has only said she will do $14k/yr so she won’t put 4 yrs tuition in a 529 I’m afraid.
If the grandma pays the school directly, do they send her a 1098 T so she can use any amount she sends as a deduction? Do you know? Thanks!
No 1098, no deduction for a grandparent paying tuition. Just the joy of knowing her granddaughter is getting a college education. But for an affluent person (parent or grandparent) there is no tax benefit to paying tuition anyway…
Would she put $14,000 times four into a 529