<p>No offense, but it's called drinking in moderation..</p>
<p>I'm not terribly big on partying. I'll go to a dance or a party, but I much prefer hanging out with people I know than being alcohol-sloshed in a sweaty dank dorm room full of strangers and semi-strangers. </p>
<p>That said, I'll usually go check out a few parties on a Friday or Saturday night, get my belief that they're lame reaffirmed, and go back to my dorm and chill with some friends. </p>
<p>...and to think I thought I'd never see a keg stand at my school...</p>
<p>I'm not against partying but I just don't like going to them. No one really remembers anything on the long run so they aren't really "memory makers"- the kind of memories that you will fondly think back on without being really embarassed later on.</p>
<p>Also, after coming back from Europe and Israel, I now think how DISGUSTING college parties are here because people get so wasted and abuse the alochol. When I'm traveling outside of the US, I stay cool and hide my American identity whenever I see a bunch of Americans making fool out of themselves in front of classy non-Americans (and Canadians). When my old Israeli boyfriend asked why don't I party here in the US when I liked to party in Israel, I told him, dude, parties here are all about getting drunk and why would I want to do that? I have other things that I'd rather do.</p>
<p>So to the OP, believe me, there are plenty of people who like to chill and have some good times with a small group of friends at home or in the bars, not at big house parties. Also, you're only a freshman so going to college parties is still fairly exciting for your freshman friends. They'll get old... by junior year at least.</p>
<p>I like ~7 people
~30 people's leaning off of me
~100+ is weird for me</p>
<p>Why can't you have a party without alcohol?</p>
<p>Parties in the US are <em>. So reliant on alcohol abuse, and the actual alcohol is almost always terrible. Keystone Light? *</em> is with that awful taste? </p>
<p>Usually I'd rather have some sober fun with friends.</p>
<p>ticklemepink, I beg to differ about parties not making memories. Have I done some stupid things while being ridiculously drunk? Sure. But, I have a TON of memories of my friends and me at parties freshman and sophomore year that we can all look back on and think fondly of. (No we didn't forget everything because we weren't THAT drunk most of the time)
Examples: "OMG do you remember that time Carlos did backflips in the street in his underwear when he drank all that absinthe?" "remember that time we had to hide from the cops in Christy's apartment after that party got broken up?" or "Remember that time Mark washed our feet for a dollar??"
We've almost outgrown the party stage now, I think, but back then it was alot of fun and we have some times we're always going to look back on and remember with a smile.</p>
<p>This is not to say that I don't have sober fond memories of my friends either (of course I do). But to say that you can't have something fun to remember from a party is not correct.</p>
<p>My daughter interviewed for an academically esteemed school, but then declined to apply after learning about the school's extreme party-hearty environment. She knew that if she attended such a school, she would be miserable for four years. </p>
<p>Did you know about your school's party-filled environment before applying and deciding to attend? If not, then you might consider transferring to a school with similar academics, a comparable financial package, and a social environment more to your liking. Four years is a long time to avoid the party scene, if partying is the social scene. (Two of my closest undergrad friends--both excellent, hard-working students--transferred from party-hearty schools where they had been unhappy with the social environment; both were glad they transferred.)</p>
<p>If transferring is not an option, and if you live in the dorms, then moving off-campus to a more mature residential environment might work for you. Otherwise, you're going to have to make an effort to find other ways to socialize on campus, and to find other friends with whom to socialize when the friends you already have are off partying. (Any friends who pressure you to party, or who label you a "loser" for not partying, are not really your friends. They, in fact, are the losers.)</p>
<p>Partying isn't for everyone. Tamer versions of today's boogie-till-you-puke parties existed when I was an undergrad. They were called keg parties, and my school's student union hosted them on-campus. Even though I wasn't a beer drinker, I attended a few of those parties. The first time, I slipped on and fell in a beer puddle; the second time, someone threw up on my favorite shoes; the third time, my winter coat got stolen. There was no fourth time. Partying wasn't for me.</p>
<p>It sounds to me like you've got your head screwed on straight. You know what you like, you know what you don't like, and--after having had the partying experience--you've come to the conclusion that you don't like partying anymore. Most people come to that conclusion sooner or later, and you've come to it sooner. That's all.</p>
<p>One of the best advantages of becoming an adult is that as an adult, you have the autonomy to choose how to spend your leisure time, and you don't have to justify your leisure time choices to anyone--least of all to your college classmates. Those who enjoy partying will continue to do so because that's their choice. You will be doing other leisure activities because that's your choice. Your task is to find out which other leisure activities you enjoy, and then, enjoy them.</p>
<p>Best wishes.</p>
<p>
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Why can't you have a party without alcohol?
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</p>
<p>because it's lame and awful and girls don't dance</p>
<p>^ I beg to differ. We DO dance- drunk or sober. It's the guys who are the ones hanging out on the sidelines!</p>
<p>Time cruncher --
We are early in our search here, but honestly, all of the guide books seem to make it sound as if every school is cool and has lots of drinking or parties. It is rare to find a description from student reports which tries to make the point " ok there is drinking but there are also options for those who aren't into drinking".
So it would be very helpful if you could tell me which schools you have found to be academically intensive and yet have a large enough number of undergrads who aren't into drinking for it not to end up socially awkward?</p>
<p>Lol I guess I'm a hypocrite, I went to a party last night (but it was for one of my extracurriculars) and it was very fun. But probably because I knew most of the people there and there wasn't slimy/gross dancing or anything. I can't imagine doing that every week but I'll admit it wasn't bad.</p>
<p>I do go to an "academically esteemed school." I haven't heard of any really top schools where few people party. The only places I think where it's rare are LAC's, which are known to have dry campuses. But if you mean academically esteemed as in the Ivies, Stanford, Duke, etc....a lot of people party a lot.</p>
<p>Every college is, more or less, a party school.</p>
<p>^^^Yeah, thats what I thought...</p>
<p>Partying is completely ridiculous. You have a much funner time if you do not drink; really. When you drink you cant remember well, you let your guard down, get sick, and make a fool out of yourself. It's stupid.. it makes you act stupid. I don't understand how such intelligent students in college actually WANT to be stupid through the use of alcohol. Find other things to do with your time, you might do something at a party that you will regret for the rest of your life.</p>
<p>
[quote]
I am not morally against partying or drinking. I have been to frat parties. I have been to club parties. I have gotten wasted. I have not gotten wasted. And I always find them awkward and feel uncomfortable during them. I tell myself they're fun, but the next morning I'm just like, what was that...that wasn't fun. That was a bizarre and unmemorable experience.
[/quote]
I don't care if people party either. I'm against rationalizing drinking and driving because of the distance of the bar is not that far from your apartment (yes, I know people like this). I don't really like drinking and I don't care if people do it as long they're doing it responsibly and understand the repercussions of their actions on themselves and those around them.</p>
<p>
i would have to say those kinda of nights are usually in the minority for most people...if you think otherwise, you probably don't know what you're talking about :rolleyes:</p>
<p>honestly, i would say most of those "memorable moments" don't necessarily come at the party, though it certainly could be the case. in my experience, as Bigredmed said, a lot of "the party" (at least those big, stereotypical parties) is just a vehicle for meeting up with friends, making friends out of acquaintances, or really making friends out of acquaintances...haha....</p>
<p>...but, in my case, the really good moments come after the party or after failed pursuits of parties. i remember once after a dance party, i walked home in the rain with my friend, who decided that, upon getting to her apartment, it would be more fun to run down the street in the rain and splash than to sleep, so i followed suit. that was pretty memorable. or the numerous times that i'd gotten piggyback rides from drunken friends and going "HUP HUP HUP..." like we were circus performers...ooohhh good times haha.</p>
<p>and the times when the party itself is a destination is usually small ones where you know most if not all the people there. once was a paint party with about 30 good friends (white shirts + fluorescent paint + black lights + good music = what do you think?!). and tonight, my friends are having a small dressy cocktail party to initiate their new amazing bar, built courtesy of the architecture school woodshop...</p>
<p>so yeah, your experiences at parties depend entirely upon who you know at them, who you're with, the size of the party, etc. i could see why people wouldn't like parties after going to ragers or things like that.</p>
<p>and just because i party on occasion, it doesn't mean i'm "stupid" or "unfocused." if anything, it keeps me sane after spending hours and sleepless nights doing engineering homework and making playlists for two radio shows. my GPA definitely isn't suffering for any of it...</p>
<p>Of course there are parties without alcohol, and more often, there are parties where alcohol isn't the focus. But how many of these parties there are, and how enjoyable they might be varies school to school. </p>
<p>If you're just starting to research schools, I suggest leaving alcohol out of the question for now (unless it's a #1 priority). Use Princeton Review's lists (most/least beer and hard alcohol, most/least party schools) as very rough guides, if you'd like. The lists aren't perfect, but if you know you're not a drinker and not a partier, then you won't want to apply to five schools, all of which have shown up on every "most..." list for a few years running. When you visit schools, ask about the party scene, and feel free to ask your tour guide about drinking policies and about the role of alcohol on campus. Is the guide aware of sub-free housing or events? Does (s)he address the group with the assumption that everyone loves a party, or with the understanding that preferences vary? Obviously, you'll want to ask around here and do some of your own research before basing any big decisions on one tour or a few students' comments, but experiencing a school's atmosphere for yourself is the best way to judge. Spending a Thurs. night is generally ideal, as you're able to see a good combo of social and academic life on campus.</p>
<p>@1 down, 1 to go: I attended a college that did have a few guidebooks talk about its 'quiet' social scene in a positive light. Specifically, students said that they loved being able to come home from a party instead of to a party (we were a semi-dry campus in the middle of a pretty alcohol-friendly consortium). The schools and the info are out there! To generate suggestions, you might want to post your own thread describing some of your child's preferences, including preferences re: alcohol and social scene.</p>
<p>Absolutely not. I love partying. It really helps my mood. If I am at a good party with good friends just enjoying ourselves theres nothing better. Two good drinks and I am set.</p>
<p>I only party if I'm sure there will be dancing going on.</p>