<p>If you have an active restraining order, he would be violating it if he attends your school. I am not sure of Florida laws, but I would definitely talk to your Dean of Students about this situation and show him/her the restraining order.</p>
<p>californiaaa: I dated a whack job for four months; after we broke up, he stalked me. A year later, he showed up at my college semi-formal. TEN YEARS LATER, he walked up to me at an event and tried to reconcile. So yeah, I’m pretty sure that the OP’s concern is valid.</p>
<p>Don’t talk to the Dean of Students; talk to an attorney and a judge. </p>
<p>Incidentally, how did you find out that he is applying to your school? Would the “others” be willing to testify that he is, in fact, applying, and knows that you are attending that institution?</p>
<p>Do you have a restraining order in place? If not, request one. Then let the admissions people know about the order. If you don’t have the order, you could be accused of slander or libel, but letting them know about the restraining order is just presenting facts.</p>
<p>You may want to discuss your fear that he is coming simply to stalk you with the dean of students.</p>
<p>In addition to notifying security and administration at your school, I suggest you get a restraining order through the city police department. Often, school property and city property have different police/secruity officers and different ways of handling violence. You don’t want to have the city policy not want to get involved because he stalks you only on campus. What are your living arrangements? Can you move into a graduate student housing complex that operates with an identification door system (where you need a campus badge to enter)? You will want to make sure that if he tries to come into your residence, you have proof that he is violating the restraining order. All in all, hope for the best, but plan for the worst. Why he choose to attend the same graduate school as you is very suspicious. Good luck to you.</p>
<p>If he is planning on applying to your college, why don’t you speak to the head of the admission’s department. Bring all of your documentation of the domestic abuse.
Explain your situation. Perhaps they will not accept him knowing the story of domestic abuse (I’m sure he’s not going to make it known to them).</p>
<p>I strongly disagree with most of the above advice.</p>
<p>No, it is not appropriate to go to either the admissions office or the dean of students. First, the admissions office cannot discuss a prospective applicant with you - I would guess that it would be a breach of confidence even to acknowledge his application. And the dean of students? He or she would have nothing to say about someone not currently a student. Further, the restraining order binds him, not anyone else. It has nothing to so with the school.</p>
<p>And, frankly, if you go to the admissions office attempting to sabotage his application, that could be grounds for a lawsuit against you.</p>
<p>I would argue, though, that he may have already violated the restraining order by applying to your college. It depends on the size of the college, of course, and on whether or not he was aware that his field of study would put him in close proximity to you. Regardless, if I were you, I’d go to the court that issued the restraining order and request a hearing. In matters of domestic violence, the court clerk should be able to assist you with whatever paperwork you’d need to file to get this matter on the court’s calendar. So, no, I also don’t think you’d need an attorney.</p>
<p>I would caution, though, that going into court and saying that you’d “heard” he’s applying to your college would NOT be enough. If you have a witness who saw the application or, at the very least, who heard him say he was applying, that would help your case. Include that person’s sworn declaration with your request for a hearing.</p>
<p>How is it trying to sabotage an application when she’s just informing them of HER situation?
She’s not going to speak with them to sabotage anything. She’s going to speak to them to inform them of HER situation. She’s not going to go in there telling them not to admit him. What admissions does with this information is their prerogative, isn’t it?</p>
<p>In many states (don’t know about Florida), one can bring suit for "interference with prospective business relations, expectations, or advantage or with prospective economic advantage.” It’s usually used where someone deliberately tries to sabotage a business contract. Could it be used where someone tries to sabotage a student’s admission to a college? I don’t know . . . but I also wouldn’t want to take a chance on finding out.</p>
<p>Frankly, if the OP walks into her college admissions office and says she wants to give them information about “John Doe,” the only appropriate response on the part of the admissions office staff would be to tell her they can’t discuss prospective applicants. End of discussion.</p>
<p>If she believes John Doe has violated the restraining order by applying to this school, she should go to court. If she thinks this is a change of circumstances that warrants the addition of additional conditions to the restraining order, she should go to court.</p>
<p>You can’t complain to the landlord if John Doe rents an apartment in the building next door, you can’t complain to your neighborhood supermarket if John Doe starts shopping there, and you can’t complain to the school if John Doe applies for admission there. If he has violated, or has embarked on a course of conduct that threatens to violate, the restraining order, you go to court.</p>
<p>I see a difference between talking with the Dean of Admissions and talking with the Dean of Students. Talking to admissions makes it about him (“You shouldn’t take him because he’s dangerous to me”.) Talking to the Dean of Students makes it about you (“I’m frightened and need to know how the school will ensure my safety if admissions chooses to admit this student against whom I have an order of protection.”) If you take the second route you not only protect yourself from accusations that you’re trying to get him rejected but you leave the door open for the Dean of Students to go to admissions with his own concerns. After all, who wants a macho whacko on campus?</p>
<p>If you don’t get satisfaction to the dean I’d contact a lawyer.</p>
<p>Then it’s quite likely a judge would find that he has already violated the order by applying for admission to the school. Go to court.</p>
<p>You don’t need a lawyer and you don’t need to talk to the Dean of Students. You need to go to court - and you need to do it now. Just make sure you have something to back up your allegation that he’s applied for admission. Submit a witness’s declaration and the court can drag him in for a hearing. Please don’t wait.</p>
<p>I find that statement very questionable if, as the OP says, it is a large university. Usually a restraining order is worded in a way that specifies a distance. One person cannot prevent another from attending the state university because of a restraining order, any more than they can prevent the other from living in the same city. </p>
<p>Also, restraining orders often are worded so that they expire after a given period of time, usually a year. So it’s very possible that the order will have expired by the time the ex arrives on campus, unless the OP first goes to court to renew it. </p>
<p>To the OP: get legal advice from a real lawyer, in your own community. You are not going to get good advice on the internet, and you could get seriously hurt (both in terms of your legal rights and whatever physical risk you face from the ex) if you rely on info you are getting from this thread. Check with your school first – some larger universities have student law centers where you can get legal advice. Take a copy of the restraining order that you have when you meet with a lawyer – the lawyer will give you accurate information as to what your current rights and obligations are, and how you can protect yourself for the future.</p>
<p>editing: I defer to calcom. But, on campus:</p>
<p>Dean of Students. Part of their resps is to assist students with issues, be an access point to administration. On campus, she needs to discuss with the people who can review, advise and advocate with her and for her. They can oversee and coordinate. They may refer to another team or they may intervene. </p>
<p>RigHt. I understand it’s a sticky situation because I cannot forbid him to enter, but if he does get admitted I would like some protection from the University or something. </p>
<p>Now that he is in town I am afraid constantly, and this will severely affect me academically too.</p>
<p>I’ve done everything in my power to move on.</p>
<p>His major here is not an outstanding program or anything, he had a full ride on his home state as well as instate tuition. He turned that down to follow me.</p>
<p>I will go ask the legal advocacy at my university.</p>