<p>After something that happened last night, I realize how naive I am about dealing with girls, etc. and it’s depressing.</p>
<li><p>Being funny doesn’t necessarily make you attractive.</p></li>
<li><p>Compliment girls more on their looks rather than intelligence.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>These are of course generalizations but generally hold true. I really regret not doing the second one, and made a big deal about her intelligence. I should’ve said more often that she was “pretty” and “beautiful”. She only thinks I liked her because she was smart, which is completely wrong, but I should’ve made the opposite clearer. It’s so obvious now why girls would favor compliments about their looks. It’s more flattering. It makes them feel better about themselves. Plus, most ppl wouldn’t think my crush was “pretty”, so it would be even more of a compliment. She just thinks I like her for shallow reasons, but that simply wasn’t the case. It’s just deeply depressing.</p>
<p>The first point is also generally true. I tried hard to make her laugh and was pretty successful, but in the end, I was probably just some circus freak.</p>
<p>Thanks for those wise words, cherry......
Number 1 is pretty true......i mean there is thin line between retareded and funny.....
Number 2 is also true.....women buys more make-up than books...so you need to say how beatiful they are.......</p>
<p>"omg, you're so smart. your SATs are perfect~!!!"
"thanks..."
"your ACT compliments your GPA sooo well"
"i guess...."
"so, want to study, i'd love to have you as a study partner, omg, you're sooo smart!!"
"yeah, go away"</p>
<p>That's too bad... you seem like such a nice guy who tries his best to help others. I'm sorry that this happened. </p>
<p>In the end though, I really think that being clever is more important than being funny. Wit usually makes girls laugh while at the same time not necessarily making you seem overly goofy.</p>
<p>Complimenting girls on their looks definitely is a must. You must make them feel that you percieve all that they do for you which makes them feel wanted. While I say that this type of compliment is a near necessity, I also believe that stimulating a girl's intelect is also important. It shouldn't be made into too too much of a big deal though.</p>
<p>Above all, what a boy must do to keep a girl happy is to make her feel comfortable. Always let her understand that you are there for whatever she needs. Basically, you should always listen to what a girl has to say.</p>
<p>From a smart girl's perspective, I can say that being complimented on my intelligence is definitely flattering, but it's more of an everyday occurrence. I'm not trying to be arrogant here, but as a rule, if a girl is smart, she knows it (through grades, comments from teachers, reputation, and so on). She probably doesn't usually get complimented on her looks, which makes it all the more precious if a guy suddenly calls her beautiful or pretty. </p>
<p>A lot of the time, smart girls feel that their intelligence is their only defining factor, because that's what people usually comment on. It's an unfortunate stereotype that the stupid, ditzy girls get the guys, and that smart girls are perceived as geeks. She may very well be feeling insecure about it.</p>
<p>It's possible that I'm reading entirely too much into this, but it's something I've noticed in many girls I know.</p>
<p>Eh, that's true what everyone says. Smart girls already get compliments from their teachers & classmates about how smart they are...they don't need that from a boyfriend lol.</p>
<p>complimenting a girl! why? you never compliment a girl when you first meet them. Especially a 8+! They recieve compliments all the time probably, what makes you different then any other guy who starts sobbing over her? Be different. Be funny, be cocky, be cocky and funny at the same time, and confident. And never compliment her directly, tease her instead. </p>
<p>Only give a compliment every once in a while when she is yours. ;)</p>
<p>Do a lot of girls like cocky guys? I thought the general consensus would be a flaming "NO!"</p>
<p>I like semi-arrogant guys though (if they have something to be rightfully arrogant about). There's a line between domineering and cocky, however.</p>
<p>Personally, I believe that any compliment that's sincere is a good compliment. Compliments on looks are always nice, compliments on brains are nice too.</p>
<p>not arrogant. lol. thats why I said, cocky and funny-- it has to be a balance of the two. Search google with that phrase, you might find some results. :)</p>
<p>The opposite sex exists to boggle us, I'm convinced. I feel the same way you do about girls, except about boys. They're confusing! So I feel your pain on this one.</p>
<p>The other people who posted are right about smart girls- we do like to hear that we're thought of as intelligent, in fact we very much appreciate knowing boys think of us on a deeper level than just something that deals with looks. But also, when a girl is thought of as very smart, it often becomes a consuming identity that we can't break out of. For me anyway I feel like I'm less often looked at as a girl than as the person who sets the curves on tests or takes lots of APs or something. So tell her she's pretty, she'll probably really appreciate it.</p>
<p>Good luck with this girl. You seem like a nice guy, and hopefully you'll find a girl who appreciates that!</p>
<p>Agreeing with vegangirl- When my grades started falling, and I didn't concentrate on school still, people still thought I was smart. It's really hard to break that generalization that I'm only a "geek"..
However, other things started to overshadow it, and most people don't really think of me as smart anymore- but of other adjectives.. If you show that you're something more than just smart, the other stuff will probably stand out more.</p>
<p>Some guys think that if they call girls 'beautiful' 'pretty' 'hot', girls will think of them as shallow losers.
So it's pretty funny when shy guys come up to me to ask me out on a date, they mention that they think I'm 'down to earth', 'smart', 'funny', 'always happy' (etc..) but they don't compliment how I look.
I personally like it when guys compliment my outfit.. i dunno why..</p>
<p>As for your 1st rule, yes.. not very attractive. Some guys look weird when they try to make girls laugh.. I always try to laugh even if it's not funny but it sounds pretty fake: "ha.ha.ha.."</p>
<p>I like it better when a guy makes me laugh not because he's trying to but because he can genuinely be witty. If you can have a conversation and make a girl laugh without telling jokes and looking like you're trying too hard it's a lot better and it takes the pressure off. If I know that every word out of the guys mouth isn't because he wants to make me laugh things feel a lot more natural. I try to follow the same rule, I want to be witty without being funny.
I also agree that you should complement a girl on her looks if you can be genuine about it. Trying to discuss the calculus homework while slow dancing (happened to me) is a pretty big turn off. Like Thisyearsgirl said, intelligence seems to be the only defining factor for a lot of smart girls, it's nice to get a compliment about something else for a change. If you don't want to complement her looks feel free to compliment something else, her taste in movies, her cooking skills, her involvement in the community, anything that isn't directly related to her intelligence as defined by school. It's kind of depressing to think that the only thing people see when they look at you is your brain, rather than who you are as a person. That's why it's so important for a guy to be interested in a girl for something else, it's a delicate balance.</p>
<p>If a girl is being smart or witty, then you can compliment her on that. If she is being "cute", then go ahead and compliment her on that. Compliment her looks every now and then, but not out of the blue.</p>
<p>If you're amusing, be so. If you're not, don't try.</p>
<p>thisyearsgirl: i completely agree, mostly from experience. not to be arrogant, but i hear TOO often that im smart and it seems rarer that i get complimented on my looks (tho it does happen every once in a while
;)</p>
<p>jessetfan: here too, i agree. i appreciate a witty guy who also understands my rather [dry] sense of humor. guys should compliment girls if they said something witty or funny, because it makes them feel good about themselves.</p>
<p>You shouldn't exagerate, though. I have a friend who constantly kept getting complimented by a friend who liked her but she wasn't interested in...he'd say things like "You're the most heartstoppingly beautiful girl I've met in my life", completely out of nowhere. It just made things awkward between them and almost ruined their friendship.</p>
<p>thisyearsgirl: youre rrealllllyyy reallllyyy right. I don't even like the word "beautiful" though. To me, it is a word that drunk guys say when they want to get into your pants. "Gorgeous" would make me think he was exaggerating or being silly. "Hot" makes me think he's horny. I like "pretty" best.</p>
<p>and being witty and clever is THE BEST THING you could ever do to impress a girl. Even better than being hot. 'Cause she will notice you being all clever and wonder why she's never thought of going out with you...then, if she's got any heart at all, she will realize that she was being shallow, and she'll still want you. This happens to me a lot. A nice body doesnt hurt but it isnt necessary.</p>