<p>To someone who has been there:</p>
<p>Info on dorms and the Greek system</p>
<p>My son lives in Burge – it is a very popular dorm for freshmen. Great location and dining facilities right there and the rooms are huge compared to dorms at other schools. That’s about all I know except that Mayflower is FAR and Daum is the honors dorm. </p>
<p>You have a daughter, right? Rush is in the fall and the girls move into the house sophomore year. I don’t have a girl but a good friend of mine has a freshman daughter in a sorority, so I might know the answer if you have questions.</p>
<p>Current freshmen</p>
<p>Hillcrest and Burge are two of the most populated, including upperclassmen. Stanley and Currier are connected, making it one of the most populated dorms. Duam is for the honor students, and Parklawn is mainly transfer or upperclassmen. The lodge is also for transfer and upperclassmen, including few freshmen. Mayflower is known as being the furthest hall from campus. Currently the university has made plans to build a new residence hall and possibly purchase apartments that are near Burge ( these apartments are for upperclassmen though I have heard little about them). Most of the residence hall system is populated by freshmen, and students playing a sport. If I am correct Burge is known for partying as opposed to duam.</p>
<p>My daughter lives in Burge. She loves the location, though in hindsight she wishes that she had requested Currier or Stanley as a first choice because Burge is the party dorm. Coolbreeze’s report on the dorms is exactly how my daughter described the dorms, although he didn’t mention Hillcrest which is located across the river. My daughter has several friends who live in that dorm and they like it, it’s just a long, cold walk to classes in the winter. </p>
<p>DD went through rush this past fall. She hated it. She was popular (lots of boyfriends, always went to prom, etc…) and involved in sports, service clubs, and the arts in high school, she also had a huge group of friends. Let’s just say that she was not used to being judged on such a superficial level or rejected by girls who made her believe that she was one of them. It was a harsh and important learning experience for her. The end result was that she ended up with two sororities at the preference round and “suicided” because she couldn’t see herself in one of the houses. She didn’t get a bid from the one that she would have accepted a bid from, hence, she is not in a sorority. </p>
<p>She learned a lot from that experience and became stronger and more confident because of it, in the end she’s happy that it worked out the way it did. Her major is very demanding and she now realizes that she wouldn’t have had the time to do both as the Greek system constantly has mandatory activities, even during the week, that she would have had to attend. Her focus is on school so she would have ended up dropping out of a house anyway. She has friends who are in sororities and those who are not, all seem to be happy with their choices. Iowa is not a big Greek school and it’s large enough that you can find your friends in classes, clubs, and other activities. You don’t need to join a house to feel included. </p>
<p>If you do decide to rush do yourself a big favor and have recommendations sent to the houses you’re interested in. The Greek counsel members who spoke during orientation told us that they didn’t look at recommendations and that they weren’t necessary. Personally, I think that they do matter because the girls who had recommendations sent in all got into a house that they wanted. My DD could have had multiple recommendation letters sent to many houses as we know A LOT of women who are in or are still members of their sororities. They were all shocked and confused when my DD told them about her rush experience because on paper and in person she’s the perfect sorority girl. Thank goodness she doesn’t care and is not interested in the Greek system, it could have been a disaster. </p>
<p>If you decide to rush and do end up in a house you are able to live in the house your sophomore year, not sure about junior and senior years. </p>
<p>Good luck!</p>
<p>What a sad portrait of the systems, LMK2. And it’s hard for me not to nod my head smugly as it fully supports all my opinions about the system as fundamentally elitist and exclusionary.</p>
<p>My daughter (a junior in HS) was intrigued by the sorority houses she’s seen on a few campuses, what with their brick facades and ivy growing everywhere. That came to an abrupt end this August, when we delivered her brother to Iowa and she saw lines of girls out on the lawn of one of the houses, in some sort of formation and doing rhyming chants and hand claps. All were blonde, straight-haired clones of one another.</p>
<p>Obviously the system has much to be said for it as it’s survived for a gazillion years. But to anyone considering Greek I say, tread carefully, keep your eyes open and be true to your values.</p>
<p>Beastman, thanks for your response. The ironic thing about my daughter’s experience is that she has long, blonde, straight hair and ( at the risk of sounding like I’m bragging), is very pretty. She spent the summer looking at the sorority websites, choosing houses that she would feel comfortable in based on the girls who looked like her. </p>
<p>The wonderful thing about the whole ordeal was that after the pain of rejection wore off she realized that she was much more than a pretty face and that the shallowness that she showed in " choosing" the sorority that she thought she wanted to belong to was just as bad as how sororities choose their members. </p>
<p>She is so much more mature now than she was in August and is happier than she’s ever been. I truly believe that things happen for a reason and that not receiving a bid was the best thing that ever happened to her. </p>
<p>If your daughter decides to go through rush support her, but, make sure she understands that a sorority shouldn’t define who she is or what her college experience will be.</p>
<p>Crete - our freshman D lives in Burge and loves it. Her roommate and many of her best friends are from Chicago and the surrounding burbs. Per our D, Burge’s party reputation is a bit overblown. It certainly is a very social dorm with some floors worse/much worse than others. It all depends on the kids on each floor/wing. She studies plenty in her room and her grades are fine. She has made friends at Hillcrest, Currier and some of the other dorms and they too are very social. The U of IA also has great Honors housing and living/learning community options if you’re interested.</p>
<p>LMK2 - our D also rushed. Mixed bag there. I agree that many of your and Beast’s points are, unfortunately, true. Our D also met the “eye test” for being greek - blond, trim, attractive, very outgoing. However, she didn’t have the classic sorority profile. She was a dedicated H.S. athlete (soccer & lacrosse; two-year captain in each. Sorry, not to stereotype - she was also in band, yearbook, gov’t etc) and she and most of her gal-pals always considering themselves as a part of the jock clique in high school. In any event, she rushed at Iowa mainly because a majority of the gals on her floor decided to test the greek waters. In the end, only her 3rd choice house preference returned the favor and she, like your D, opted out. While she was very disappointed, she wasn’t devastated. In fact, only a handful of gals on her floor ended up pledging. She has not looked back since and has never regretted her choice. In hindsight, her decision absolutely was the right one for her.</p>
<p>I’m probably a little bit more open-minded about greek life than others. For some kids, it’s a fine choice. Many of our older son’s UW-Madison’s friends are greek and truly enjoy it. In the end, choose wisely and choose what’s the best fit for you.</p>
<p>Good luck.</p>
<p>Big10Padre
Our girls sound like they could be sisters. Same physical appearance, both athletes (mine was a Varsity tennis player and participated in other sports), involved in the arts, basically a very well rounded girl. </p>
<p>Thankfully she doesn’t regret not being involved in Greek life because she became involved in several clubs that truly interest her and has made some good friends who share those same interests. She’s not a big partier so I don’t think that the Greek life would have suited her.</p>
<p>Like you, I don’t have any bad feelings toward the Greek system and think it’s a great thing for some young adults. My husband is a lifelong member of his fraternity and my son has hopes of being a member of the same fraternity in 2012. My husband and I both encourage him and pray for the best. </p>
<p>The funny thing is that my husband is still angry about the outcome of my daughter’s experience, even though she’s so over it. Being the protective dad that he is he thinks that the sororities on the Iowa campus must have different standards than his alma mater, because all of his brothers “would have flocked to the house who had girls like his daughter.” In hindsight, he realizes that it’s a good thing that she isn’t in a house! :)</p>
<p>LMK2, your husband’s reaction makes me laugh as I’d feel the same way. Who could not make my darling girl their top choice?? Unthinkable!</p>
<p>And of course, therein is the rub and the ultimate demise of the Greek system for my daughter (who is, again, still in HS). She thought you just sort of joined a house. The idea of going through a process and being chosen or not chosen seemed fundamentally messed up to her.</p>
<p>In any case, and regardless of one’s feelings about the Greek system, I think the great thing about it at Iowa (and UW, too) is that it’s really, really optional. It comprises a relatively small portion of the student body and to live happily outside it is quite easy, as B10P and LMK2’s girls can attest. This is not true of other schools, even in the Big 10, where the Greek system dominates the social structure and to opt out - or be passed over - relegates you to a lower social caste. And taking this to an extreme, browse the forums here on CC for the southern schools. Heaven help the passed-over rushee at Ole Miss or Vanderbilt. Her life is a total failure.</p>
<p>Beastman - My husband, like most dads, thinks his baby girl is the most amazing girl on the planet. Very sweet and I wouldn’t want it any other way. :)</p>
<p>On the second day of rush my DD said she felt degraded, that it was like being in a cattle call, with all of the girls being bussed from house to house to stand in line to be superficially judged. She hated that she was putting herself in a situation that made her feel like she was begging for people to like her. She’s so independent and never had to try to make friends, it always came naturally. It was such a bizarre experience. But, like I said in my first post, she learned a lot about herself and is a much more confident and thicker skinned person than she was before. For that she is grateful to the Greek system.</p>
<p>She doesn’t have bad feelings toward the Greeks and has friends in sororities and fraternities. It’s a good thing for some and not so good for others. In defense of Greeks, they do a lot of good service work and are generally a nice group of young adults.</p>
<p>As a freshmen it’s unfortunate to read your daughters experience. I know a number of people who are in the greek system and also know many who are not in the greek system because they do not think favorably of it. What I hear about the soroties is that it is extremely more elite than the fraternities. When one is not wanted by where they rush typically it is personal reasons. Personally everyone I know who rushed are in the greek system, and the majority of the people I know did not rush and have unfavorable views of it. It is true that the greek system is not as popular as say University of Illinois Urbana Champaign though early in the year articles read that there was a dramatic increase of interest by freshmen.</p>
<p>Big10padre & lovemy2kids - it seems like you are adding to the superficial thinking by saying “my daughter was blond and pretty, why didn’t she get it”. There were probably other reasons - like they didn’t click with the girls and visa versa. If your daughter didn’t like the rushing, that comes through and the girls in the sorority pick up on it. They may think that your daughter doesn’t want to be there or doesn’t like them That being said, my daughter, who goes to another University got her last choice too when she rushed. She was even dropped by my sorority which really hurt. But I know it was because she didn’t really bond with them. She was thinking of rushing again during the second year, but when she asked people who were in sororities in college, she found out that many said their best friends were those that they made outside the sororities.</p>
<p>insightgirl - You’re absolutely right, my comments were a bit superficial. </p>
<p>Now that a full academic semester has passed my daughter doesn’t even think about Greek life. She has made some amazing friends, her grades are great, and she is very happy.</p>
<p>She realizes that her major is so demanding that if she had selected the sorority that would have pledged her she would have had to drop out. Her roommate is in a sorority and is always attending social events during the week and all weekend. She would have had to split her time studying and socializing, which wouldn’t have worked. She spends eighty percent of her time studying and twenty percent socializing. Thankfully, she doesn’t mind.</p>
<p>I agree with you that in her case she probably didn’t bond with the girls during rush. She isn’t one of the rah-rah types and she’s not good at hiding her feelings. If she didn’t like the girls who interviewed her it would have shown, and it probably did. :)</p>
<p>Like your daughter, mine has friends who are in sororities and they say the same thing about finding their closest friends outside of sororities. </p>
<p>In hindsight I think that Greek life works well for those who want to be identified by a group. My son is looking forward to going Greek. But, for more independent people who prefer to schedule their social time as they see fit, Greek life isn’t a good idea.</p>
<p>Insightgirl - point well taken. Much like LMK2’s daughter, its likely that our D’s less than wholehearted commitment to rush (as you noted) probably led to the outcome that she experienced. She now has no regrets about the rush process or its results and is glad she gave it a try. She’s very happy today where’s she’s at. Different strokes for different folks. Hope things work out for the best for your daughter.</p>