Early Action--a nail-biting wait! Help!

Colleges and Universities A-Z University of Notre Dame
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<p>Hi... My son applied to the University of Notre Dame early action, and should be hearing from the admissions office any day now. I meanwhile, am a lot more stressed out about this than he is. Having gone there myself--and having never pushed him to go there--I nonetheless know that it is his dream, and that he'd be a good fit at ND. (Better, most likely, than I was.)</p>

<p>So, tell me what you think of this application profile, and it's chances for acceptance Early Action. </p>

<p>Apparently, ND takes the highest of the SAT/ACT, my son's ACT composite is a 34. He has taken all honors classes available to him, most of which earn college credit from St. Louis University. His GPA is roughly a 4.2 something on a 4.0 weighted scale. This puts him 11th in his class of 128. His extracurriculars are strong, as he runs varsity cross country and varsity track, earning all-district honors in track. He participated in Missouri Boys State this past summer, where he was elected to the State Legislature, served as party caucus chair and had the time of his life. He is currently the sports editor of the school newspaper and a managing staffer of the school's daily video productions closed circuit newscast. He has worked throughout high school, as a referee for the local youth soccer association and a summer at Taco Bell. He has completed 100 hours of Christian service at this Catholic High School. He got an excellent letter of recommendation from his video productions teacher, who spoke a lot about his character.</p>

<p>He is also, I guess, what they would consider a legacy, as I graduated from Notre Dame in 1984. </p>

<p>A few weeks after he sent in his app, the Navy awarded him a Navy ROTC scholarship, through its Immediate Selection Decision program, whereby each of the nation's 35 regional commanders can give 10 on-the-spot scholarship offers at their discretion. Upon receiving this, I contacted the ND Admissions office to let them know of this, not just as an honor, but also as meaning that if selected, he will definitely attend ND, because money is no longer an issue. I know ND is supposed to be need-blind in its admissions, but I didn't think it would hurt. It is now included in his file.</p>

<p>And so, here I am, losing sleep a few days before the fated letter is supposed to come. I've heard SO many horror stories about kids who don't get in--every tale is of some brilliant kid with the world going for him. I don't know if maybe these people don't know the whole story, or if there is a room full of admissions counselors spinning a roulette wheel to see who wins and loses.</p>

<p>My biggest concern about my son's app is that he's had three B's in his first six semesters of high school (out of 48 total classes in that time), putting his class rank lower than the median.</p>

<p>Am I losing sleep for nothing? What does anyone think? Will you help a middle-aged lady get a good night's sleep by interjecting some reason into my sleep-deprived brain? How come I was never this nervous when it was my own admission letter set to come in the mail?</p>

<p>Thanks for your input!</p>

<p>Diane</p>

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<p>Hi Diane! Oh, I remember that feeling so well! My daughter dreamed of going to Notre Dame for what seemed like forever. I remember running out to the mailbox every day this time last year and being so nervous. We knew she would be heart broken if she wasn't accepted and we worried what we would say to her. At that same time, we had a great deal of faith that she would be accepted. Talk about conflicting emotions! I'll never forget that moment of seeing the big white envelope in the mail truck. We couldn't wait for her to open it (but you could see the congratulations through the window on the envelope so we knew!)</p>

<p>It looks like your son has strong credentials, lots of great extracurriculars. Remember, admission counselors don't look at just one area, they look at the entire student. They also know a little something about the high schools that helps them put rank in perspective. He is definitely a legacy since you graduated from Notre Dame which I believe will give him an advantage. I think it was a great idea to let ND know of the honor your son recieved from the Navy.</p>

<p>On a side note, we didn't hear until the 16th. Our daughter's back up school was a private school here in Texas. The deadline for their application was the 15th so she went ahead and applied online. Several weeks later, she received an acceptance letter from that university with a huge scholarship. Her first words were, are you going to make me go there because of the scholarship?? Of course, there was no way we would ever deny her of her dream school. </p>

<p>I don't know how to help you from losing sleep as I did the same thing too. Naturally, as parents, we want our kids dreams to come true. I do think he's got a great chance of being accepted EA. Keep praying and keep the faith. That got us through this anxious time. Be sure and let us know what happens. Your family will be in my prayers.</p>

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<p>Diane,</p>

<p>I would be shocked if your son was not admitted. My son was admitted ea last year. He had a 33 ACT, higher class rank, but equivalent ec's. My nephew who is now a sophomore at ND had a lower gpa, scores, etc... and was accepted rd.(no legacy in the family) Waiting is awful and next year I will be hoping for the fat letter for my current junior student. Good Luck, lose no sleep and book your hotel room for orientation.. good luck and I will be waiting to hear the great news in a few days.</p>

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<p>Thanks so much, theirish and anonymom7! I wish I could be as calm about this as my son is--I feel like his pinch-worrier! Having been there, I know that ND isn't utopia, but it is a good place. I remember a lot of classmates who were legacies and had literally had the university shoved down their throats for years, who were quite unhappy to be up there, and discover that they hadn't quite made it to heaven. So I've always been cautious about pushing the idea too hard on the kids. Once I realized though, that Eric wasn't just enamoured with the idea of Notre Dame, but the reality of it, I want his dream to come true for him. I guarantee you I never cared this much when I was a high school senior, I was happily oblivous. Of course, that was a different day and age.</p>

<p>Your responses mean so much to me! Mainly, they tell me that, no, I'm not nuts--a little neurotic maybe, but not nuts <g>... I appreciate your good wishes and your prayers and I will definitely post online, whichever way things turn out. I don't know if I have the stomach to stick out five more months of deferred!</g></p>

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<p>Diane, if he's not in I'd eat my hat. His stats are above range, he's in the top 10% (and that's the figure reported to USNews), and great ec's. He'd be in without the legacy factor, I believe, and <em>with</em> legacy I'd be completely shocked if he didn't get in or even was deferred. Actually, as I think about it, with those stats there's no way he's denied EA, so you can rest easy.</p>

<p>This must be your first. I can already feel how much calmer I am about the second one. We felt the same was about our son getting into ND as you do - my brother and father-in-law attended there and we loved Our Lady's university. Our son made ND his first choice but just never acted overly excited about going there...until he actually got there, and he's been extremely enthusiastic about ND ever since!</p>

<p>Good luck - in my mind he's a domer but you'll know soon enough.</p>

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<p>Doc Mom, you don't know how much I want you to avoid eating your hat! :)
I'm also racking my brain to think of the Class of 84-er with the golf cart--the story does ring a bell...</p>

<p>Seems there is a whole world of new terminology out there, with early action, early decision, "deferral reversal" (the guy charges 600 bucks--I'm in the wrong line of work!), multiple tests, and now the SAT thing changing that I still don't get. With the Internet, there are all these people posting saying things like "I'm ranked first in my class of 900, have already completed half my dissertation in astro physics, have a 1600 SAT, a 36 ACT, All-State football and basketball, drama lead, debate team captain, Student Body President and, in my spare time, I take homeless children bowling--do you think ND will accept me?" </p>

<p>Kind of like the supermodel staring in the mirror, pinching a centimeter of skin (after great effort) saying, "do I look fat in this?" It's enough to make anyone feel inadequate--and I'm just the mom!</p>

<p>This forum is keeping me sane! Today, I broke it to my son that the letters aren't going out until next week some time (I'd told him the same 14th date I'd gotten from an admissions counselor). He started towards the mailbox anyway, when I told him I'd already checked. He STILL went to the mailbox, just in case, I suppose, the letter fell into the Bermuda Triangle of the USPS...
Thank goodness he has finals, that should keep him busy...</p>

<p>I tell you, I've grown to appreciate and respect ND much more in the years since I have graduated. I never go back for football games (but will if my son gets in), but we go up every summer and stay on campus. I get a real sense of calm and peace there. For many years, I thought I wasn't the type of student they wanted or expected, but, come to find out, I think I am. Because I really do believe that, bottom line, push comes to shove, they believe in the values they purport to espouse. And somehow, by osmosis, those values set in to the students, to be there later in life, whenever they are needed. I never pushed my son to go that direction, but now that he's interested, I'd like to see him there, because I honestly respect the place and believe in what it stands for. I could have gotten an education anywhere, I suppose, but at ND, I really got a foundation for living.</p>

<p>And the football ain't bad, either :)!</p>

<p>Thanks all of you for your words of encouragement. I'm assuming you've got kids applying too, in which I case I'll be praying for all of them! </p>

<p>Diane</p>

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<p>"at ND, I really got a foundation for living"</p>

<p>I've said something similar before: Notre Dame just makes good people.</p>

<p>I have no one applying now - (eldest is a soph at ND), but spent hours on these boards two years ago and still visit the boards occasionally; especially interested in what's going on at ND for admissions so with EA results coming in, I'm here daily for a couple of weeks. </p>

<p>My second son is a sophomore in hs, and he didn't believe me when I told him freshman year grades would matter for college admissions - or else he just felt it was so far away it couldn't possibly matter - and he got A's <em>and too many B's</em> freshman year. He's now in the top 20% of his class, but taking the hardest load you can as a soph - four honors classes that are weighted (no freshman classes are weighted) - so he's hoping he can claw his way into the top 10% over the next four semesters. I know he'll test well on the SAT and ACT so if he can just work up in class rank...</p>

<p>Anyway, he's talking about trying to go to ND just like his brother. I have to admit, the idea of paying for ND again makes me sweat :) but we love that place so much (it has been great for our eldest) that we would just find a way to make it happen for him, too.</p>

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<p>Hello,all-
I have been reading your posts regularly over the past month as my daughter also applied early to ND, but I've never responded until now. I just wanted you all to know that I am so glad to see that there are other parents who are equally as anxious as we are. The anxiety in our house right now has reached record levels that we never knew existed. How can I one day feel certain she will get in and the very next day feel that it will not happen? I, too, am weary from listening to people tell me horror stories about this neighbor who was a valedictorian and that cousin who was a valedictorian and neither of them got in. I think that is what contributes to the anxiety of waiting for "the letter." One good thing I've learned from these posts are the size of "the letter." At least now I know to look for the BIG envelope as I gingerly open the mailbox! Thank you all for your candidness in sharing your feelings. I feel like you've been my confidantes over the past month, (especially you, docmom and theirish) without you ever knowing it. I keep praying that my daughter will get in because just as you all are saying, "Notre Dame just makes good people" and whether or not she believes that right now.....we know it.</p>

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<p>Thank you docmom, theirish, anonymom and marathongirl for all of your support through this nail-biting time--I am SO glad I found this site! :)</p>

<p>Oh, yeah, and by the way--HE GOT IN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) :) :)</p>

<p>Last night, my stomach was tied in knots and I was, as the kids would say, a stressed-out freak! But my son was very stoic--he and my husband were amused by my anxiety over something over which I had no control. Finally, I ventured a bit and asked, "Eric, have you given any thought to what you'll do, how you'd handle it, if you didn't get into ND (or Northwestern, the backup school.)?"</p>

<p>He looked at me, with total sincerity, and said, "mom, the way I figure it, if I don't get it to ND, then there must be a reason, there must be something else in store for me. So I don't worry about it..."</p>

<p>From the mouths of babes! At that moment I knew that ND was the perfect place for him, so much faith at the tender age of 17. I wanted his dream to come true...</p>

<p>And today it did, when the mail came early, and there was that big white envelope, which just happen to rip open (how on earth did THAT happen? ;)) as I pulled it out of the mailbox. I went up to the school to tell him. As stoic as he was last night, he surely was happy today! </p>

<p>At the top of his Christmas wish list was "admission to ND," so I handed him the letter with a red bow on top. I also told him I had no intention of buying him the Eminem CD he wants for Christmas because it's trash :). He just grinned at me and said he's fine with the acceptance letter... :)</p>

<p>Now that I know the answer is yes, I am utterly thrilled, because I know what Notre Dame is. The people care there, ethics do matter there, the Christianity they espouse is more than just a slogan--it isn't a bang-you-over-the-head thing, and yet it is subtly pervasive, with benefits that last a lifetime. Certainly, my Notre Dame education helped me in my career. But it helped me infinitely more in my life, which can be far, far more challenging.</p>

<p>Thank you again, every one of you! I appreciate your support... May all of you have a wonderful Christmas and New Year... Who knows, maybe we'll see you on campus???</p>

<p>Diane</p>

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<p>Hey Diane, I'm following you around! I left you a message on the EA decision board! I'm so excited and happy for you and your son! :) :) :) </p>

<p>I felt the same way when my daughter was accepted and feel that way even more as I am eagerly awaiting for her to come home tonight for Christmas. (9:05 pm tonight!) I can't wait! ND has been a remarkable experience for her. I don't think there is any place on earth that could have met her needs - spiritually, academically, socially - just everything. Every day there is just bliss for her. It's such a wonderful, indescribable feeling to know your child is exactly where they should be.</p>

<p>I'm sure your Christmas will be extra exciting this year. Although I was nervous, I still had so much faith she would get accepted and had bought a bunch of ND stuff online for her Christmas presents. She was always teasing me beforehand that I didn't think she'd make it because I would occasionally talk about back up schools (the just in case talk). When she got those gifts, she knew we had so much faith in her. It was really fun. </p>

<p>Congrats again! You made my day! :)</p>

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<p>the only question i have dd, and it just comes of this way: do you want ND more than your son does? just make sure you aren't pressuring him to go there and can choose to go to another institution if he wants to. I may be completley wrong and he might be like me and would die to go there! Tell him congrats on getting accepted</p>

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<p>Trust me, it's his dream. And as a mom, it's my most fervent desire to see his dream come true, whatever it might be. Some day, when you have kids of your own, you'll understand what I mean... Fact is, you couldn't be further off... And it's probably a good idea, before you think you understand a situation as complex as the relationship between a parent and a child, to know at least a little bit about it. I remember the miserable legacy kids who hated Notre Dame because it was never their idea and the place could never live up to the expectations their parents put upon it (or them.) I actually spent a long time trying to talk him out of Notre Dame, downplaying it, making darned sure it was his idea... I am, however, very happy to see his dream come true. That being said, I'll pass along your congratuations...and wish you the best of luck in pursuing your own dream...</p>

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<p>i'm sorry, i just read what i said and it didnt come off the way i meant it to.. i was just saying make sure that it's not your dream and not his (which i now know is not the case). The only reason i say that is because some of my friends' parents try to make them WANT to go to the their alma mater or whatever. I think it's awesome you care so much!</p>

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<p>No big deal, andrew. Funny thing about being a parent is that everything they say about maternal instinct--and I'm sure docmom, marathongirl, anonymom and the irish will back me up on this--is that it is everything they say it is...and more. In the animal kingdom, tiger moms will take on just about any predator, and literally scratch a predator's eyes out, if that's what it takes to protect her cub. Not to say I'd do that--I'm not the Texas cheerleader mom or anything :)--but it does give you a glimpse into the kind of intensity the maternal instinct has. You may notice there are no dads (at least that I've seen) lurking or posting in this forum. It isn't that they don't love their kids or care any less that their kids get their dream...it's because they aren't programmed the same way moms are; they aren't endowed with quite as many "worry genes." Again, I'd think that the other moms on line would agree that we wouldn't mind if we had fewer worry genes!</p>

<p>I'd honestly say that I was so conscious of not wanting to duplicate the legacy experiences of some of the kids I went to ND with (I was not a legacy myself), that I virtually went the other direction with my son, trying to sell him on the merits of the state university. The fact that ND costs $40,000 a year, give or take, and we are very middle class, made it very easy to get used to the idea of a state university. I was very squeamish, too, when my son started pursuing the Navy ROTC option--until I realized that he wanted to do it not just to pay for something we couldn't, but because he really wanted to serve his country, see the world, and get the kind of leadership experience and training the Navy provides.</p>

<p>Once it became apparent to me that this was his dream--and that it had, in fact, been his dream for years of his own downplaying it because he figured he probably wouldn't get in and we couldn't afford it (this is something he has only revealed recently)--it was so obvious that he wanted ND more than anything he ever wanted in his life. So, at that point, I wanted it for him just as fervently. Believe it or not, that's the first time the alumni emotions started kicking in, and I realized just what a good fit the school would be for him, and, more than anything else, just what a strong, supportive environment the place has.</p>

<p>On the latter point, I have a lot of experience. You see, I wasn't the prototypical Domer. I had the stats and the leadership, and was even admitted as an ND Scholar. But I wasn't a rich kid, I wasn't preppy, I didn't own plaid. To top it off, I was agnostic (then, not now). I wasn't happy there--or didn't think I was--the first two years, and I hung out with some other people who were similarly unhappy. I drank too much, did stupid things, it's amazing I survived. It wasn't until later in my life that I realized it was a lot like the Footsteps Prayer--my problem wasn't with the university, it was much deeper than that. And the University didn't abandon me, God didn't abandon me; in fact, they carried me through.</p>

<p>In hindsight, now that I'm 40-something, I realize that the most lasting thing the university gave me had nothing to do with the things I learned or the doors an ND diploma opens (although those things are definitely a plus), but the sense of peace I get when I walk on that campus, and realize that, as screwed up as I was, ND didn't let me fall through the cracks, didn't give up on me. The Catholicism of the school was never forced or shoved down my throat in any way, and yet the spirituality of the place was pervasive. </p>

<p>One story I must tell, to give you a glimpse of ND most people don't get. I chose to spend the early years of my kids' lives at home with them, even though my husband didn't have a high income. Things were tight. But I volunteered a lot at my church, and especially working with youth--with a special eye out for the "troubled" kids that some coaches like to shove aside, but I tried to reach. Meanwhile, all my fellow alumni were in incredible jobs, making huge amounts of money. And ND's development office sent out a letter, chastising those alumns who hadn't contributed, questioning their commitment.</p>

<p>I was livid, so I fired off a letter, quoting my ND Scholar certificate: "May this scholar be granted continued success and brought to fullness of life." And I asked them, point-blank, just what they considered success and fulfillment meant. Was it something on a 1040, a hefty portion of what could be given to the university? Or was it all those countless hours given for free to the community--and especially to kids from tough family situations--what I believed to be the values the university espoused.</p>

<p>Much to my surprise, one day the phone rang. It was Chuck Lennon, head of the national ND Alumni Association, calling with a personal apology for the tone of the letter. Apparently, they'd hired on a new person to write their fund letters, and they'd messed up. He assured me the campaign was being redesigned (which it was), and told me in no uncertain terms that the university considered what I did to be just as much a contribution to the university and its mission as any cash that anyone ever sent in. He was sincere, not blowing smoke.</p>

<p>Fact is, they could have blown me off easily. There was no reason to respond--I was no major benefactor. But they did, and in a major, major way.</p>

<p>That's the kind of thing I'm talking about. When they say they care about every student in the place, they mean it.</p>

<p>I've known for some time that I love the university, in the way an unruly teen comes to appreciate such things after they grow up and settle down. And obviously, I love my son. It wasn't, however, until I realized that he was seriously interested in the university did I begin to understand the implications of having two things I love so much paired together. </p>

<p>I write this not so much to elaborate on my own situation, but to give a glimpse of the University as more than just a Top 20 institution...</p>

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<p>Thank you for that, Diane. You are such an eloquent writer and I feel like I've come to know you and share so many of your thoughts and beliefs! You truly have echoed the thoughts in my heart---the thoughts of wanting your children to succeed and be happy. I wanted my daughter to get accepted more than anything I've ever wanted in my life.....because of how Notre Dame will affect the rest of her life. I keep telling her that I don't know if she truly realizes the magnitude of becoming accepted at Notre Dame, but we, as parents, do! I haven't posted since yesterday because we've been sick with anticipation awaiting the arrival of "the letter" but I am thrilled to say, it's here and she's in! This is going to be the greatest Christmas ever! I just got home from buying about every single ND hat, mug and mouse pad I could find!
Good luck to all of you, and hope to meet you some day at orientation!</p>

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<p>Congratulations, Marathongirl! Worth the wait, wasn't it? I think it's going to be a Domer Christmas around these parts, too :). Congratulate your daughter for me, and I hope that maybe we'll meet one of these days... Now the next big wait is for dorm assignments, a much more pleasant wait, to say the least!</p>

<p>Merry Christmas!</p>

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<p>Diane, I have met so many 40-ish Domers who have a similar story - they liked it there, but didn't really appreciate it until years later. </p>

<p>I am not an alum but feel that same overwhelming sense of peace on that campus. My husband works at the university level and every so often I wonder if he should pursue working there. We actually love the community, and not to mention tuition would be free. Of course, the way we run our lives we would wait until son is graduated and <em>then</em> he'd work there!</p>