We’ve all been on the short end of some bluntness. The important thing is to learn what one can.
The problem is that competitive privates like to see “get up and go.” You presented your friend as having none of that, “total lack of commitment,” and that you came up with this 11th hour idea.
Now it turns out she does have some clubs and tutoring, plus a sport…but you’re looking for “wow” that compares to others. Of course out antennae went up.
Why can’t she engage meaningfully now?