Essay Grading? (Practice SAT)

<p>Hi! I just took a full length SAT practice test for the second time and I don't trust myself to grade my own essay. I wonder if someone could help grade this? I'm going to include all the embarrassing misspellings as well. </p>

<p>Prompt: Can knowledge be a burden rather than a benefit?</p>

<pre><code> When you know something and it affects your mind in the most negative way, yes, it is a burden. While I agree that knowledge has helped us over the years, in the wrong hands, it can be stressful and dangerous.

For example, in Les Miserables by Victor Hugo, Javert, the police officer, attempts to arrest the bread theif, Jean Valjean. However, when Valjean saves Javert's life, this knowledge burdens Javert to the point that he frees Valjean but drowns himself. Another instance where knowledge can be a burden is in the movie, Flyboys. After witnessing a fellow pilot killed out of the bounds of honorable military methods by the Black Falcon, Rawlings knows who to hunt down. Ironically, when the Black Falcon spares Rawling's life, Rawlings is tormented by this knowledge. Should he avenge his friend's death or return the spare-of-life back? Even in my own experience, I feel that knowledge is a mosquito, a nuisance that wants to suck the blood of logic out of me to keep me in confusion. For instance, when I witnessed a friend allowing someone else to cheat of their answers, it makes me irascible inside. However, the person is a friend, and the question whether to report or not hangs in the air.

Knowledge can also be a danger. In recent times, WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange has been under spotlight for revealing confidential secrets of the government. Hillary Clinton, as secretary of state, condemns Assange and proclaims he has put many lives in danger. After the "Leak", foreign countries started meeting more often. While we have yet to witness the long term effects of the "Leak", it is evident that foreign tensions are rising; putting the U.S. in a precarious position.

All in all, knowledge can be just a danger of a burden as wonderful of its benefits.
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<p>=( ick.. now that I have typed my essay and reread it.. gosh.. there are many things I want to change... Last sentence.. eww!</p>

<p>Ahh well.. any benevolent individual who wants to help score my essay? =D</p>

<p>Please? =) Or just give me some pointers on how to improve… I read something in another thread about including examples, making up personal experiences… so that is what I did… xD</p>

<p>

use “finally” instead.</p>

<p>this is a very good essay. I give a 8-9/12.</p>

<p>Thank you! =D Your response is very much appreciated!</p>

<p>

As much as yours.</p>