I’m really nervous that my common app essay falls into the category of “someone important in this person’s life died, so what”. I think my essay is really honest about how much family means to me, but I really would like someone to tell me if it says enough about me. Please let me know if you’d be willing to read it!
Don’t do it.
I’ll look at it
It’s not that it’s ‘so what’, it’s that there are so many applicants who have had a devastating loss (really, you would be surprised), that making your story of loss stand out is just very very hard to do well. If you do it, you need to take it a step beyond what your family means to you, to another level.
I’ll read it. The most important thing with these types of essays is you aren’t following the mold. Like the infamous “mission trip” essay you have to make sure this essay doesn’t fall into the trap of cliche. The death of family is devastating to you, but it’s also devastating to the 20 other applicants your reader will look at. Really try to stand out here.
You can write about loss- but they aren’t reviewing you for “how much family means” to you. In some cases, kids make it seem they’re so connected they can’t leave home. Or it turns out to be about that person, not you. Or it happened ages ago and is really about you in lower school, etc.
The essay needs to be relevant for those colleges, show the attributes they want to see. So if this can show how you were touched, but resilient, inspired and went out to do some good, that’s different.
But remember, “Show, not just tell.” Not, “And so I will blah, blah, I’m a better person…,” but some real actions or evolution.