Executive Function Coaching

Parents Forum
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<p>I've seen people mention this term here on this forum and I'm curious about it.</p>

<p>Can someone describe for me your/your child's experience with executive function coaching? What issues led you to seek it out? What are some specific examples of tasks/skills that the coach addressed? Was it helpful?</p>

<p>Does anyone have experience with working with such a coach during the last year of high school to prepare for the challenges of managing the tasks of college? Or is this something one arranges on-site at college and continues while in school?</p>

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<p>I’ve only heard of this in the context of autism-spectrum and Asperger’s Syndrome type cases. Some schools might help arrange this, depending on the depth of their disability services, but other places might say that that is a service parents need to arrange for and pay for privately.</p>

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<p>Executive functioning relates to such aspects of someone’s day as planning ahead, learning how to advocate for oneself, speaking to the professor if s/he doesn’t understand, and knowing who to call/work with/where to go if there’s a myriad of problems (course sign-up–Registrar or advisor or professor, financial aide question–FA, can’t get to lunch on time concerns–food services, dorms issues–RA or residential Director, computer problems–IT, wanting a campus job–Career Services, etc.). It is a catch-all phrase that can fall under a description for Asperger’s, but very often used to describe areas of weakness for kids with ADD as well as just a general deficit.</p>

<p>A specific example that plays out in college is when students do not get consistent feedback about how s/he is doing, mostly because many times, there isn’t anything but a midterm and final. It’s also very difficult for kids who have this weakness when they have a paper due in 3-4 weeks. That paper may not get the appropriate level of research needed, may not get started until the last minute, and may not include some specifics in the assignment that the professor is expecting. These kids also often lose things (books, notebooks, coats, calculators, etc.) And have lots of trouble with all that paperwork to graduate: requirements, etc. </p>

<p>One main component that helps is a daily planner. The student automatically (you wish!) checks to see when assignments/exams are due/scheduled. The student is also strongly encouraged to break down an assignment, especially a long paper. (get bibliography, create notecards, make an outline, write a thesis statement, get approvals and guidance from the TA or professor, etc. and especially keep on schedule!)</p>

<p>It is especially hard for kids to keep focused on the school routine. Classes are missed because they have terrible sleep patterns. And that’s just the beginning. You see, in HS, the school was always 7:30-3:00 (or whatever) five days a week, plus clubs and sports and homework at night. College is completely different: classes are helter-skelter, crazy hours. There are mostly long-term assignments, and those parents who used to tell you when to do things and could follow-up? They’re 300 miles away!</p>

<p>What to do for your child who struggles with executive functioning when college is looming? It depends on your child and the school. S/he might benefit from some scaffolding at first. That’s having support services of some sort that helps A LOT at first and pulls back over time. That would be ideal. You do want your kid to manage on his/her own, eventually, but having some kind of support initially is very helpful.</p>

<p>PM me if you need other ideas to help.</p>

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<p>Son’s new psychologist used that term - I’d never heard it in that context before.</p>

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<p>Just be careful out there. Someone gave me the name of a company that does “executive function coaching.” I googled them and found that they are one of the for-profit franchised college admissions counseling companies. Our local franchisee is a high school football coach looking to make some money on the side. I guess he could be competent, but obviously check out the coach before you pay any money.</p>

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<p>Ideally, executive “coaching” is done at school throughout his school career: his homeroom teacher reminded him/her to bring such-and-such home, and they use planners. At home, you’ve probably done lots to help too: picked up clothes where they didn’t belong, made sure your child went to bed at a decent hour, and up and out to school, etc.</p>

<p>Personally, I do not trust someone who claims to be a executive functioning “coach”. I think that’s a contrived word. Get a tutor instead! And just make sure that tutor knows how to help with this area of weakness. By the time college rolls around, your child would benefit more from context-driven help (such as learning how to plan and write a major paper), rather than such basics as, “keep such-and-such in the same place and you won’t lose it”.</p>

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<p>Scaffolding is used to describe the level of help a student needs. Often, especially in a new setting, the student needs A LOT of support and services. That support may even include physically walking with the student to find the Registrar, the Advisor, the Classroom, the RA, the FA office, the Bursar’s office, etc. But, does s/he need to have this level of support all the time? Not likely. Over time, the student is much more comfortable with many of the routines, but still needs help with a specific area, like writing a paper.</p>

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<p>limabeans nails it in #3!</p>

<p>:)</p>

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<p>The funny thing is, a good football coach <em>could</em> be a good executive function coach. The coaching skills are similar-- ability to motivate kids, a strong personality, patience, attention to detail. Check out before you spend any money, but by no means should you write off the football coach. I’d hope for some training so the coach knew what is reasonable to expect from a person with executive function deficits.</p>

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<p>I’m not sure where lack of executive function overlaps with ADD (inattentive type), but it definitely does. My son always made up for his lack of planning, lack of concentration, procrastination, disorganization, etc. with just working twice as hard as everyone else until the work just got too difficult for this strategy. I too worried about his ability to survive in college. His pediatrician and a psychologist we talked with recommended that we try a small amount of Ritalin to see what effect it had.</p>

<p>Well it really changed his life, his attitude, his self esteem and his ability to free up some time for fun and socialization. Of course, now that he is 17 he doesn’t like to take it but that’s fine too. He is figuring it out bit by bit.</p>

<p>That’s my story.</p>

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<p>Except that in this case, as the franchisee, the same guy also does college admissions counseling, ACT and SAT prep and would probably wash your car if the price was right.</p>

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<p>We had a tutor to help with EF issues back in 8th/9th grade while D was getting diagnosed (ADHD-inattentive & NVLD) and what Soomoo said too; the meds have been very helpful. You can definitely tell the days when they are forgotten :slight_smile: And, more importantly, D recognizes it too. </p>

<p>Planners of some type (what ever works for the student) are a must. Limabean gave a really good overview.</p>

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<p>If at all possible the leveling off of support, and movement of responsibilities should be started gradually during high school. This must be a cooperative effort between student, parent, and teachers/resource aide. Make goals every quarter of things that the student will become responsible for. Even things as small as brushing their teeth without reminders, learning to do their own laundry, open a checking account, and less reminders on homework submission. Make a plan that works for your student
The planner is a great tool, as is an electronic calendar on a celphone (iphone is awesome for this!). Each student is different so the level to which you can do this is totally unique to them, however the more you can shift before college the less severe the transition will become.
Many schools offer services for students who have had IEP’s in high school. I would assume they offer assistance in transitioning from highly structured environments to becoming more independent.</p>

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<p>The issue comes with the peope whose executive function disorder is so severe that they will always need a highly structured environment. Like CardinalFang has said before, the person in a wheelchair isn’t ever going to outgrow needing a wheelchair ramp, and some people with executive function disorder may never outgrow needing a “coach” figure. (I imagine that in the past, many of these had the title of “Executive Secretary.”)</p>

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<p>^Yes. Exactly. </p>

<p>Some of these behaviors are just a result of how the brain works in a particular individual. You will see some growth in executive function skills as a child grows, but believe me, if you’ve ever met my dad, you would agree that for some people it is not a matter of being coached out of these patterns.</p>

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<p>I did not mean to insinuate that people would ever simply grow out of a disability. This thought process has been very frustrating to me coming from family members who mean well but just don’t get it. I do think that certain coping skills can be learned to make the transition easier, and that services that are offered at universities to support should be explored (not simply to say hello and goodby in a week, but provide ongoing support). If I did not explain myself properly, than that was my error. </p>

<p>For my oldest, we have chosen to make the transition by going to community college first. He is responsible for his schedule, work, laundry, assignments, etc. We are here to help if he asks, assist with registration, help make drs appts, etc. We were close by when his tire went flat at 10pm after a night class, on hand for help when he filed taxes, a perpetual open dining hall. He tanked his first semester. Literally tanked. Back up, start over, what didn’t work, where can you get support, try again, doing beautifully. It may take him an extra year to get to university to finish his four years, but he will get there with confidence that he can succeed and care for himself. Baby steps. It is the path he chose and what appears to be working for him.</p>

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<p>You have made wise decisions. Please share your story with everyone you know who might be in a similar situtation. I think one thing that bothers CardinalFang and I a lot is that we were given the absolute wrong advice from everyone, and were given no reason to believe that going away to a 4 year university right away wouldn’t work out.</p>

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<p>One of the BEST things we ever did was have S1 evaluated by a neruo-phychologist. Insurance paid so it was a viable option. Through this we were told the very part of his brain that was effected, that he was working like a CPU with the printer cord severed (this was before wifi, lol!), that the very things that made him so gifted in one area, made things so challenging in others. There was a lot of stuff about the prefrontal cortex, but to be honest I don’t remember at this point :). All of a sudden, these grey areas became tangible and we felt like we could grasp how to help him. We also had a much greater idea of the areas he should be accountable. With a student who is gifted and learning disabled (which many high functioning autistic children are) that area can be so blurred. Teachers think they are lazy. It is hard to advocate. We couldn’t even get an IEP before this study.</p>

<p>I would highly recommend it for anyone who has this resource available. We found it, along with testing done at Johns Hopkins, among the most beneficial things we have done to assist in advocating for our son. Also, our son is very analytical. It was very helpful for us to have this information to help explain his disability to him. It’s not some mysterious, made up thing. It’s a very real, medical issue and here’s where you are affected. When he got older and used excuses ‘I have trouble…’. ‘No my friend, sorry. You are responsible for this. Not that part of your brain buddy.’. I am anxious for the day there are better diagnostics (don’t we all). This helped us.</p>

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<p>I agree that a sports coach could be a good “life” coach. </p>

<p>I loved it when my kids took taekwondo…someone else ragged on them about being responsible, getting good grades, or just told them to drop and give them 10 pushups…and they had to say “yes sir” and they listened and I wasn’t the one doing the nagging! Loved it.</p>

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<p>^ Agreed on martial arts! All of my boys (and husband) are black belts in Taekwondo. It was awesome for all, but S1 benefited from the structure, activity, focus & accomplishment.</p>