Our son is currently applying to colleges for next year. The following are some details about him:
GPA 3.65
WGPA 4.35
SAT 1500
AP USG&P 5, Phys1 5, CalcAB 5, MicroE 5, EngLang 4, MacroE 4, Chem 3, Psych 3
Current APs are PhysC, EngLit, Stat, and EnvSc
Internship + strong recommendation from Govt lab with selective admission
Good extracurriculars
Asian
He is not looking at Ivies and equivalent, so most of the colleges on his list are large publics with good engineering programs.
We are concerned about his executive functioning issues and lack of support at large schools. While he is very capable of intellectual rigor, especially in STEM, his performance may be compromised if does not improve in planning and organization.
What kind of support can you expect for students like him at private colleges (e.g. Rice)? We donât expect to get any aid, but paying full tuition at a place like Rice is going to be a stretch for us. And if he does go to a private, and still does not receive adequate support, that would be terrible.
Would appreciate suggestions for places that would be a good fit for him.
RIT has a reputation for providing a supportive environment to those who are neurodiverse, including those with executive function issues.
RIT offers 1:1 coaching, though Iâm not sure if there is an extra fee for that.
You should contact the Disability Services Offices for details.
Program emphasizes skills building and transitioning to less supportive (i.e. work) environments.
Try googling âoffice of accessibility (or disability) servicesâ for each college youâre considering. Support seems to vary from college to college.
On one end, you have support programs, like RIT, University of Arizona SALT, University of Denver. Some support programs are fee-based. Offerings include more structured supports like weekly meetings, professional coaching, EF training.
Other colleges provide less structured support to all students, from peer EF coaching to workshops to individual or group tutoring. Again, this varies by college, but all colleges will have some baseline support to help students deal with the increased rigor of college.
Does your son receive accommodations in high school? 504/IEP? Some accommodations will carry over to college provided you have adequate documentation.
Executive functioning support should be offered by most schools through their disability office that accommodates students with an IEP. Some schools will not accept a 504 accommodation and will require an official diagnosis and the supporting paperwork to be filled out by the doc. Your best bet is to research their websites and email questions you have.
Agree with the other suggested schools. Also look at (1) UConnâs Beyond Access program. Fee based.; (2) William & Mary, which has support for the neurodiverse; and (3) Virtual Hall, an outside academic coaching service for college students. Fee based. https://virtualhall.org/.
The elephant in the room- does your son have a realistic view on what he needs?
To me this is more critical than what the college provides. And is he aware of how much scaffolding/support the family has been providing (if indeed you have been providing this?)
The kids Iâve seen crash and burn were either the kids who did not avail themselves of the excellent and abundant sources of help, OR the kids who didnât understand that alarms are used to wake up on time, that if a dining hall closes at 9 am it means you canât show up at 9:30 and expect a cafeteria worker to whip you up waffles so you wonât be hungry during your two hour chem lab (since Dad always dragged the kid out of bed, and Mom was pretty much a short-order cook).
What % of that is your (natural, parental) anxiety about having your young adult child move away from the home where you can supervise things to a place where he is largely on his own; what % is demonstrated inability to organize, and (to the extent you can guess); what % would the experts who know your son say is likely to be resolved (or meaningfully ameliorated) by the maturing that his brain is/will be doing over the next few years?
does your son have a realistic view on what he needs?
He does not, and we donât expect him to at this stage. But we have seen him do better in the last couple of years, so we will keep our fingers crossed and hope that he will continue to grow.
Good questions. You are right in detecting anxiety in my words, so thatâs part of it. But he has needed help, so we will certainly arrange some support in the beginning wherever he goes. We hope that he will figure it out gradually, but will reassess periodically.
Thanks for all comments and suggestions here. I am going to think aloud below.
I think these are some options that we have:
Arrange EF support through the school or privately. I have less confidence in what public colleges would offer. We will wait till he gets his offers to decide what to do.
Public colleges where he is applying are all large where he will have to compete for prof and TA time. Same would be true for advising. I think a student like him will benefit from this. We will have to make a call on whether that is worth the additional cost.
Another option is to have him go to a school that is easier (if that is acceptable to him).
You forgot option 4-gradually reduce the support you are offering to him now so that he begins to experience the consequences and find work -arounds to compensate for his EF issues.
I think this is very important! All students need to figure out where and how to get help, and also need to develop a network of friends with whom they can work together.
Just a word of caution. Some parents expect too much from college roommates and friends to support their childâs mental health issues or learning differences. It is kind if they offer, but it really isnât their job
I have been so impressed by colleges embracing and understanding we all have learning differences and some need additional supports. I have had both public and private colleges discuss their accommodation approval processes for students with anxiety and/or depression to executive functioning needs to other learning differences. Collegesâ websites will post their processes and each accommodation plan if it gets to that point is unique. Call and talk to staff.
I love to hear about students thriving in college who I know struggled at times.
I do love RIT, as mentioned above, they are exceptional in this area.
IME âeasierâ is not a helpful metric for somebody with EF challenges, and can actually aggravate the situation: âeasierâ work is easier to dismiss as less urgent (b/c you know it wonât be hard / wont take very long), less interesting and less meaningful.
ETA:
IME, the challenge for many students isnât figuring out where/how but when THEY should go get help (in general, the answer is âbefore you think you need itâ- aka as the first time something doesnât go to plan (first time you realize that you forgot to do an assignment in time, first time a quiz/test didnât go as well as it should have, etc.).
Other options to think about:
Look into Honors Programs at large unis. Many times they act as small schools within big schools and the profs really know their students.
Check out their Academic Coaching options and their Supplemental Instruction programs.
If youâre considering Rice, have you looked at Baylor?
