I know both are great schools. Can anyone provide any insight into the two? Parents or students who visited both?
@TexasGold , Phillips Exeter has a “bigger name”. It is known for great academics. Also, the campus is great!
For Exeter, I believe you might find this website helpful: http://theexonian.com/interactive/tios14/
What is your kid like? What are the factors that matter?
Deerfield is significantly smaller, so it may be a better environment for kids who want to try things that are completely new to them vs specialize or double-down where they already excel. Dress is formal, if I recall correctly.
Exeter is larger, more diverse, and dress is casual… it is especially well known in Math, so if your kid wants to be surrounded by the best and brightest Math kids, Exeter would be a clear choice.
It really depends on your kid…
I would recommend visiting both schools once more.
My DD was accepted and revisited both. I think it all comes down to fit. All of her pros were in the Deerfield column and that’s where she ended up. She enjoys academic dress and sit down meals. She likes the smaller footprint and number of students. She is happy that she’ll have a single room after this year yet will be surrounded with friends (there’s a request system).
As a parent I agree with all of her thoughts. When revisiting Exeter I saw many students studying alone in corners and in the dining hall as well. I wasn’t enamored with the athletic facilities which are all concrete nor the Elm Street dining hall which felt too 70s to me and put out place. I know the library is an architectural marvel but it felt super cold and uninviting. I did love the quad area where the modern languages building was and other buildings that were super historical. The class I sat in on had students that were clearly not engaged at all but that could have just been a miss.
All that being said it’s about fit and we really left it up to our daughter to tell us where she felt she might have the most impact during the next four years.
Thank you all. @MAandMEmom thank you so much for the thoughtful response. I will walk into the revisit days with all these things in mind. Thank you.
@TexasGold in response to @MAandMEmom , I have had a completely different experience when visiting Deerfield as an Exeter student. To me, Deerfield has always felt like somewhere where I didn’t belong, where anyone who was not part of the elites did not belong. I mean, their motto is “Be worthy of your heritage.” At sporting events, Deerfield athletes are always incredibly rude to Exeter athletes. Other schools aren’t like that- Andover, SPS, Choate- the kids at these schools have great sportsmanship, and it’s nice to play against them, but with Deerfield it’s always been different. I’m sure that there are students at Deerfield who are great, accepting people, but that has not been my (or many other Exeter students’) experience.
As for Exeter, of course there are students going to be studying alone in the corner, and if you look to another corner there’s a group studying biology together. And a dud class is definitely just a miss. Out of all my classes at Exeter, 40 so far, I’ve had one class that was “dud,” meaning that we were quieter and didn’t do great Harkness. They happen, but it’s not common.
But listen to what everyone has said- go to your revisit days and really take both campuses in.
Also, at Exeter, the concept of an “Exonian” is really important. Alums say that they can be talking to a stranger in some random place around the world, and all of a sudden they’ll say “Hey- you’re an Exonian.” There’s something about Exeter, about Exonians, that we can recognize complete strangers if they went to Exeter. Many of the qualities of an Exonian are developed while a student, but admissions’ goal is to admit people who already feel like an Exonian, so since you were offered a place at Exeter, they saw that Exonian quality in you, and that means something. If you feel that kind of connection when you revisit, then Exeter is the place for you.
Trust me I have no elite heritage or blue in my blood and my daughter most certainly does not (try to figure that one out). I was simply giving MY perspective for MY visit. I also agreed that the class I visited was simply a miss. I mentioned fit several times in my post and the OP asked for insight and that’s my insight.
Exeter vs Deerfield is pretty much like stridently arguing over the best color for the DB11 you are ordering. If you didn’t have the choice between Exeter and Deerfield and were forced to go to either one, it would in all likelihood be beyond fabulous, so come up with a completely specious reason why one is the best for you and the other is the worst thing in the whole world and sleep the sleep of the just.
I agree that both are great but very different, so it’s worth it to visit them if possible. Friends’ kids who attend either one say that Exeter is more diverse yet larger and maybe less “cohesive”. DA is more traditional, formal. Both are great options and I agree that the revisit days will be very helpful. Ask a lot of questions, keep an open mind and have fun!
Mom of 4 Exeter kids here- feel free to pm me with questions. In our experience Exeter is a very diverse and yet tight knit community. Our kids have formed amazing friendships and the kids are very supportive and kind to each other. They have friends from all over the world and the academics are challenging.
My son preferred Deerfield over Exeter.
I am a current Deerfield student but got into both Exeter and Deerfield and was choosing between the two, so keep the bias in mind. Here is my read on the two.
Deerfield is obviously a lot smaller than Exeter, and its strengths are in the humanities as opposed to STEM which Exeter excels at. At Deerfield, the community feel is very strong - we share meals together 5 days a week, and have many events that bring the school together. Exeter seemed to me too large to have that, and was a fairly large part of my decision. Athletically, dependent on sport, the schools differ. Deerfield excels in lacrosse, crew and squash. Exeter excels in the larger sports (except football). Both music programs are similar, but Deerfield’s orchestral program is particularly standout, if that’s also an interest. I don’t know if Exeter has Saturday classes, but Deerfield doesn’t and that is a huge plus.
On a more social side, I’ve never really liked the exeter kids when we play them in sports. In my experience they seem full of themselves and act like they are better than everyone, opposed to other schools like Taft where the kids are always chatty and fun to be around.
PM me if you have any other questions.
@academylivin I would say that you are 100% on point and my son attends Exeter. (didn’t apply to Deerfield due to distance from home)
Hi
Thanks for sharing your experience at Deerfield. My child is considering to except deerfield over Exeter. But we would like to get into architecture or computer science. If exeter is a stem school then we should probably consider exeter over Deerfield. But in terms of culture, I think we prefer Deerfield. Please share any other thoughts you may have knowing that we would like to get into architecture or computer science. Athletically she is in varsity badminton already in her current school. I don’t think either school offers that Minton. Wondering what other Sports she could switch into. She also plays the saxophone and currently is in concert band and jazz band and she seems to be enjoying it quite a bit.
@hpmindo I’m a stem oriented student at Exeter, and there are a lot of students who are also stem oriented, but not all. I took my first computer science class this past fall, and I absolutely loved it, so much that when applying to colleges, I put it as my second major option and I took another class in the winter. The computer science department has a cool policy about advanced classes: they send out a survey each spring to all students who have taken advanced classes, and they decide which electives are offered the next year.
Regarding architecture, there are a bunch of architecture students from around the world who visit our library. For Exeter students, there are two different architecture clubs, and both are relatively new but they also have cool futures ahead of them.
As for sports, most JV teams at Exeter are a mix of students who want to try a new sport and who got cut from Varsity, so she could definitely try out squash or tennis.
Finally, I play saxophone too! I ended up dropping band for other commitments my upper year, but I loved playing in concert band at Exeter! We also have a talented jazz band, and there’s also many small groups that include different instruments including saxophone that perform for various events, like the Exeter rock concert or the student soloist concert.
When you revisit, you can definitely talk to the computer science department teachers or anyone else that you feel would help with your decision. Just ask your guide!
@hpmindo had some experience the concert band and jazz band programs at deerfield - they are both really great and the teacher is one of the greatest guys you’ll meet. Deerfield doesn’t offer Badminton, but does have other racquet sports like squash and tennis, as well as a dedicated racketball club that plays through the winter. There architecture classes as well as AP and post-AP computer science. Just because a school is “better” in STEM or humanities doesn’t mean it is weak in the other - these are elite prep schools and all of the subjects are incredibly strong and have talented members.
If you have any other questions let me know!
Excellent options - congratulations. Obvious statement, but I do think it’s about instinct, feel, and fit for your child, which, with these two schools in particular, would likely feel palpably clear on revisits.
FWIW, one of our children was accepted with nearly full aid to Deerfield – really painful to pass up. I hesitate to offer generalizations or the words our child actually articulated because I don’t mean to offend anyone and we do have dear friends at Deerfield, but since others are being forthright: she personally found it a bit clubby, remote, and small. There was an overrepresentation of Nantucket Reds (guys) and UGGs (gals) the day we visited and, as silly as that perhaps sounds or as pervasive as that is at many NE B schools, it was the kind of thing that registered with a 14-year. S/he is kind of a hybrid kid – chose Exeter for STEM (is an engineering major now) but also for its vast athletics, music, and leadership offerings. S/he deeply loved the experience at PEA and thrived, has sent tiny, personal donations each year since graduation, and remains extremely close to friends and teachers alike. It’s a genuine family. We also have a humanities/“artsy” type of kid attending who happens to play sax BTW. We are told the jazz scene is “legit.”
Just a final note: if true diversity matters (ethnic, religious, socioeconomic, and beyond) we have never experienced a more diverse community than Exeter. We’ve been a part of many schools with mulitple kids. Oftentimes, we were disappointed to find that “diversity” simply meant inclusion of a few extremely wealthy kids from overseas and perhaps some athletes who don’t mix as much as you’d hope (sorry, it is absolutely what we’ve experienced at certain schools). At Exeter, diversity is the real deal. The kids are from all backgrounds and really do blend nicely.
Best of luck - both great schools. I do think they are quite different and that one or the other will surely emerge as a better, more logical fit for your child.
@Valdog very interesting stuff to here, I guess Deerfield does give that vibe to some people.
@waterpololover you’re experience with deerfield athletes is the same as I have had with Exeter athletes. Guess we don’t represent ourselves well to each other. huh.